Here I come, but I ain't the same
Mama, I'm coming home
Times gone by, seems to be
You could have been a better friend to me
Mama, I'm coming home
You took me in and you drove me out
Yeah, you had me hypnotized
Lost and found and turned around
By the fire in your eyes
You made me cry, you told me lies
But, I can't stand to say goodbye
Mama, I'm coming home
I could be right, I could be wrong
It hurts so bad, it's been so long
Mama, I'm coming home
home" Mama, I'm coming home by Ozzy Osbourne
Saturday, I was supposed to join Corey and Sammy at EJ’s soccer game, but it got rained out. I spent the day at home updating my resume and sending inquiries about jobs to a few people I went to graduate school with. On Friday, Nathaniel emailed me the formal grievance. Reading through it made it real for me. It also made me realize how much I didn’t want to go back to the clinic, so I needed to start looking for a new job.
I took a break around 2, when Trevor came over. He spent the morning working on the website and his coding videos. When he was done working, he kept distracting me with Vine videos. I instructed him to do something more productive with his time: like look up places to live.
The next time he distracted me was to show me a picture of a huge pool in a backyard home in Plano.
"Do we want a house?” I asked.
“Why not?”
“Are we ready for that commitment?”
“Of course I am. If you have doubts about us-“
“I don’t!” I stopped him. “I meant a house is permanent. We’re not just committing to each other, but to a location, our jobs, and a house. ”
“Oh...”
“I don’t have doubts about us. It's just hard for me to think about it when I don't have a job. I would love to live with you in a house.” I explained.
“With a mouse?” He smiled
“Yes.” I smiled too.
“In a box? With a fox?”
I laughed. “Yes, in a boat, with a goat. On a train, in the rain. In a tree, now let me be!”
Trevor laughed too. “We have time; let's just keep our options open."
"My lease is up at the end of June, we don't have time."
"Mine is up in August."
"Oh, so we get to stay at your place? With your rules?"
Trevor smiled. "Temporarily until you have a job and we find our place: whether it's an apartment or a house."
"Ok." I agreed. "I guess there's no harm in looking at houses."
"Exactly. Justine needs a backyard.”
I grinned. “Yeah, she does, but if I get kitchen duties, you get backyard duties.”
"Ha. Duties. Poop.” Trevor joked.
“You’re so lame.”
“You want to live with me, what does that make you?”
“Generous.” I replied.
We spent the rest of the day looking at realtor website and houses. Nothing specific considering we didn’t know our price range; just things that we liked. Like the fact that I wanted one story and he wanted a pool. Or I preferred an open floor plan, and he preferred a below the ground pool. I thought at least 3 bedrooms would be nice and he thought at least 6ft of water in the pool would be nice. I knew we would have to get serious about it soon, but it was fun to imagine our house and life together.
We were planning to drive to Wichita Falls that night so we didn’t have to wake up early Sunday, but they were under a tornado watch and I did not want to risk it. I promised to drive if we left early in the morning, so we did. I played my Mother’s day playlist, featuring the classics “Stacy’s Mom” and “Mother Lover". Trevor stayed up and sang with me. I sang Justin Timberlake and Trevor was Andy Samberg. When "Mama Said Knock You Out" came on, Trevor shook his head at me.
“Why is your playlist so dark?”
I gave him a look, temporarily taking my eyes off the road.
“Really? What else would it be, considering the relationship I have with my mom?” I asked.
“You don't have a relationship cause you refuse to find her.” Trevor answered.
"Yeah, well I know enough to know it wouldn't be good."
"That's not fair. I might not be bad."
“I doubt it.” I sighed, but changed the song. “This is the relationship I hoped for.” I admitted, playing Spice Girls “Mama”.
Trevor rested his hand on my leg as we drove, stroking comfortingly.
We arrived at Trevor’s mom’s house around 9am. The only bad weather we ran into was rain. I woke Trevor up and we made our way into his childhood home. It was quiet, so we crept into Trevor’s old room.
“This is where the magic happened.” he said, letting me into his room.
“Lies! Your Uncle already told me about you. The only magic you had was online.”
“He doesn’t know what he's talking about.”
I smirked as I looked over his room. His room consisted of a twin bed, his computer, games and gadgets on a desk against the wall, and an entertainment center that held a TV. It was pretty plain, but I expected that from Trevor. He wasn't a bells and whistles kind of guy. He was a minimalist aka lazy. “No girl ever gave you any in this room.”
“You’re about to…” He smiled, coming closer to me.
“No Trevor!” I warded him off. I giggled as he tackled me to the bed.
“Get off of me.’ I shrieked, but then remembered to keep my voice down. “Now, or I will-“
“You’ll what?" He said, cutting me off and tickling my sides. I busted out laughing, trying to get out of his embrace.
“Stop!” I laughed, bucking against him.
"Never!" He said, tickling me harder. I couldn't stop the laughter as it erupted between us. I tried to squirm away, but he followed, laughing just as hard as me.
"Please!" I begged, gasping for air. He stopped tickling and laid beside me. He pulled me into his arms and was moving his lips to mine when his bedroom door opened.
"Trevor?" His mom said, from the doorway. Trevor quickly pulled away from me, smiling.
"Hey mom. Happy Mother's Day," he greeted her warmly, giving her a hug. I stood up quickly and straightened out my clothes and hair.
When they broke apart, I smiled at Trevor's mom.
"Happy Mother's day Mrs. Tobin."
"Thank you Lily. I didn't know you would be joining us." Mrs. Tobin said giving me a small smile.
"Apparently, I'm a surprise." I said, looking over at Trevor.
"A welcomed surprised." Trevor smiled at me.
"I'm going to go get ready for brunch. You two should do the same. You know how your granny is." Trevor's mom finished, giving Trevor another hug before leaving us.
As we changed, Trevor asked, "Why do you still call my mom Mrs. Tobin?"
"'Cause she never told me to call her anything else." I said, as I played with my hair in the mirror.
Trevor came behind me wrapping his arms around me, looking me over in my floral dress.
"You look amazing." He said, kissing my cheek.
"Then I'm ready to go." I said, with a smile.
We were in the kitchen waiting for Trevor's mom. I was trying to explain what a breakfast nook is to him.
"At Rocky's house, that little corner in the kitchen with the small table? That's a breakfast nook." I explained
"If my mom put a table right here-"
"No! It's not a nook!" I cut him off.
"I don't get it." He shook his head.
"Get what?" Mrs. Tobin said, joining us.
"You look great mom." Trevor complimented her.
"Thank you."
"I'm trying to explain to him the concept of a breakfast nook." I smiled.
"What for?" Mrs. Tobin asked.
"Apparently, Lily needs one in our house." Trevor told her.
"A house?" Mrs. Tobin, exclaimed.
"Yeah, we're looking at buying a house together." Trevor told her, proudly.
"We're thinking about it." I added quickly, giving Trevor another look. It was bad enough he didn't tell her I was coming, now he was springing on her we may be buying a house? He really didn't think things through. At all.
"Well, hopefully y'all have plenty of time to think that over. Let's go." Mrs. Tobin said, chirpily.
We all got into Trevor's car to go to brunch. I sat in the backseat and gave them time to chat. When we got to the restaurant, we were the first ones there. We got a table for 9 and sat down. We ordered coffee and water before Helen, Trevor's granny, 2 of her daughter's Cathleen and Barbara, and their kids Lisa, Reese and Elizabeth showed up. It was tradition that the adults went to brunch before separating and having plans with immediate family.
I felt a little out of place because no one else's significant other was there, but Lisa smiled at me.
"They're at home with the kids. It's Mother's Day, meaning we get the morning off." Lisa explained.
"I like that tradition." I smiled back.
"You would." Trevor teased. We looked over the menu and I asked Trevor what he recommended.
"You've never been to Cracker Barrel?" Barbara asked me.
"No, this is my first time." I said.
"I'm sure they don't have them where she's from." Mrs. Tobin commented.
"They're everywhere." Helen disagreed.
"I've never seen one in California, but I see them all the time in Dallas. Trevor's just never taken me." I answered, diplomatically.
"Every time we went out to eat growing up was at Cracker Barrel." Trevor stated.
"So you've outgrown Cracker Barrel huh? Too big for your britches?" Helen said, disapprovingly.
"No, just when you ordered everything twice, it's time to try something new." Trevor joked.
The waitress came back and took everyone's order. When the menus were cleared, Trevor pulled out the gifts and handed them to his mom and granny. "It's from Lily and me."
His mom opened hers first to reveal a wooden jewelry box. Inside, was an earring and necklace set that Trevor normally bought his mom.
"Thank you son. This is beautiful." Mrs. Tobin gushed.
"Thank Lily too. She picked it out." Trevor smiled.
"Thank you Lily." She said, closing the jewelry box.
"You're welcome."
Helen opened her bag and pulled out the cardigan I picked out like Trevor instructed. Then, she pulled out the throw blanket I picked out myself. Stitched in the corner was the green Tobin crest she had displayed in the front walkway of her home.
She ran her fingers over it and looked at me in surprised. "You made this?" She asked.
"No, I can't sew at all. I found someone who stitched it on for me." I admitted.
"I know you picked this out. Trevor been buying me sweaters since they stopped making him make noodle art in school." Helen remarked while we laughed.
"Hey!" Trevor butted in. "You said you loved my sweaters."
"Not much thought behind it." Helen quipped. She turned back to me. "That crest was one of the few things I took from our home. My husband was so proud of it and the Tobin name. Every time I look at it, I think of him. Thank you for that."
"My pleasure."
"Trevor, did you tell granny your news?" Mrs. Tobin asked.
"What news?" He asked.
"About buying a house. In Dallas. With Lily." Mrs. Tobin announced.
The food was brought out before Helen could react. The shock was apparent on her face. I stared down at my coffee until Trevor grabbed my hand, reassuringly on top of the table.
"We're looking. As soon as I can figure out what a breakfast nook is and why Lily needs one, we might actually buy." Trevor said lightly.
"Doesn't Uncle Jimmy's house have one? I always thought it was a great place to raise a family." Lisa smiled.
Mrs. Tobin gave a little laugh. "I'm sure Lily doesn't want to live in the country."
I looked at Trevor, speechless. I didn't know what to say. Did he want to live in that house?
"In my day, you didn't move in until you were married but I'm happy that you're settling down. Wherever that may be." Helen told Trevor.
I nodded and we began eating.
"Once y'all get settled in, you can get me the coconut cake recipe. I'm still waiting on it." She informed me.
"What? I sent it to Mrs. Tobin." I said, turning to Trevor's mom.
"I didn't receive it." She bristled.
"I'll get it to you as soon as possible." I promised, apologetically.
We finished eating brunch and headed back to Trevor's mom place. We watched classic movies, like the kind that came on TCM. I felt like a complete intruder as they watched and laughed at movies they've obviously seen plenty of times, but I was so glad Trevor included me. The last movie we watched together was called "The Apartment". It ended with the main character confessing his love to a girl and she told him to shut up and deal.
When the movie was over, Trevor turned to me. "That's one of my mom's favorite movie. Probably why I fell for you, you tell me to shut up all the time."
"Shut up Trevor." I said, with a smile.
"I love you too darling."
"Ready for dinner?" Mrs. Tobin asked us.
Trevor nodded and I stood up too. Mrs. Tobin went to her room to get ready. I headed to Trevor's bedroom to do the same, but stopped.
"Can you log on to the computer so I can print out that recipe for your granny?" I asked.
"I'll do it. Just resend the email." Trevor offered.
"Thank you."
I was working on my make-up when Trevor joined me.
"Lily, do you mind if I take my mom out tonight? Alone?" He asked.
"No, not at all." I said, putting my make-up away.
"I just need to talk to her-"
I stopped him. "Babe, you don't need to explain anything. I completely understand. It's mother's day. Spend some time with your mom."
Trevor leaned in close and gave me a kiss. "I love you Lilypad."
"I love you too T-Rev."
They left for dinner and I ordered a pizza. While I was waiting, I posted a Mother's Day status on Facebook. I posted the video for MotherLover and captioned it:
Happy Mother's Day everyone! #MotherLover #EveryMother'sDayNeedsAMother'sNight! #ImmaBeTheSyrupYouCanBeMyWaffle
I watched Casablanca when the pizza arrived. I barely made it halfway through when Trevor returned to his room.
"That was quick." I commented, searching for my phone to see what time it was.
"Yeah, I have to work tomorrow remember?" He said, shortly.
I got up quickly. "That's right. Sorry." I said, getting ready to go.
We left without saying goodbye. When I asked Trevor about it, he said his mom went to bed. I had a sickening feeling in my stomach that something was wrong. Trevor tried to hide it, but I could feel it.
I pushed it away and followed him to the car. He sped all the way home. His quietness just confirmed my thoughts. I used the drive to finish watching Casablanca and to give Trevor some time. When we got to Trevor's apartment, Trevor went straight to bed.
I took Justine outside and fed her before joining him. He watched me intensely as I joined him.
"Are you ok?" I asked him, as I laid beside him.
"I'm fine." He said, unconvincingly as he pulled me in his arms. He kissed me deeply, his normally soft lips forced my lips apart roughly as he pressed against me.
"Trevor-" I moaned, breaking away to catch my breath.
"I love you-" He started, stroking my hair. "I want you so much. I need to be inside you."
I nodded my consent before kissing him again. He rolled on top of me and made quick work of removing my clothes as his lips and hands explored me everywhere. He pinned me down as he made love to me. I didn't try to break his hold. His aggressiveness surprised me, but I never felt trapped or afraid.
Afterwards, he leaned his sweaty forehead against mine and brushed his lips over my face.
"I'm committed to Dallas, my job, and you. I'm ready to buy a house and start a family. Let's get married." Trevor said softly.
I stared at him, stunned silent.
8 comments:
Oh Trevor....clearly something went down between him and his mom....I could totally see Trevor and Lily getting engaged in the near future but not like this...a proposal shouldn't just be a reaction or an attempt to prove your relationship. Hopefully they are able to have a rational discussion about this, it would suck if Lily hesitates and Trevor gets really offended and they ended up in a big fight. Great writing though, as usual!
Oh my I couldn't deal with that mom! She's got some issues..how uncomfortable for Lily.
I just found this blog a few months ago and I have been reading for hours every day to catch up. I love it so much. Your writing is amazing.
I'm so glad for your character guide b/c the person I had in my mind for Trevor was nothing like your Trevor and I like your Trevor so much better. I watched One Tree Hill so he is one of my favorites. His personality in your blog matches his personality in One Tree Hill.
I love Lilly and Trevor together. I love reading a blog with a true love story.
I just hope Lily and Trevor don't rush into anything. I know they have known each other a long time and they are vested in their relationship. But getting married? Buying a house? They need to slow down (er, Trevor needs to slow down). A wedding should not be had out of spite. Even if he has felt that he wanted to marry Lily before now, I feel like now if he would propose (properly) it would not feel as genuine. They need to relax a little bit, life is not a race!!
PS: Can I say how awful it must be to have BOTH sides of parents against your relationship? That would be the worst; but even still, it would not even cross my mind to get married just to spite them lol just saying!
Trevor has said countless times he wants to marry her. But I do agree that this isn't the way if it is rushed at all. I think it's clear they both see a future and it makes sense they both talk about future. I also think this isn't how Trevor really wants to propose, he's more of a romantic, example justine.
Hoping he talks to her about what happened, but he also might not want hurt her feelings. One thing she has to know is she is not marrying the mom, my mother in law drives me nuts sometimes but I'm happily married to her son and can care less. With time she got better so hopefully his mom will. looking forward to the next post hoping they will talk about what's going on and not fight.
I know Lily said she would take any type of proposal from Trevor, but I'm hoping she doesn't take that one. I would've liked it to be more romantic. I don't like the way he didn't ask her to move in with him wither, it was like it was understood and they just started looking for places together. I need him to be more romantic!
Maybe the mom is upset because Lily has managed to get the grandma to like her and she's just jealous. That does suck for your relationship when the parents don't like the partner. I sure hope someone comes around.
Luita
I agree with him needing to plan a more romantic proposal and things like the dog and the clues to taking her to Japan and even things like way back when her bought her and sammy that house warming gift and it was really tailored to her and other things make me think he would normally have proposed more romantic.
But in regards to the moving in together I thought it was adorable how she mentioned she needed a new lease and then was mad he didn't say anything. Then he sneaks in a comment about when she moves in and she can't help smiling excited.
This proposal (if we call it that) did feel weird because clearly something happened. if the thing with the mom didn't happen I could see him saying it out of love ,like "let's do this!"
It sounds like something Trevor's mom said rattled him pretty badly. Ironic that it is his mom. When His family was first introduced I would have thought his Grandma would be the problem, but now she seems to accept Lily and it's him mom who is being a pain in the neck. Trevor is normally Mr. Happy, so whatever his mom said must have been bad. I hope he can open up to Lily, but I expect if what his mom said was bad, he might keep it in to protect her. Although I think it's good that Lily and Trevor have been discussing marriage and their future together, I agree with the previous comments that a hasty engagement as a reaction to something a family member said is not a good idea. They should move forward, but take things one step at a time.
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