Comfortably Numb

"There is no pain, you are receding

A distant ship, smoke on the horizon

You are only coming through in waves

Your lips move, but I can't hear what you're saying

When I was a child, I caught a fleeting glimpse

Out of the corner of my eye

I turned to look, but it was gone

I cannot put my finger on it now

The child is grown

The dream is gone

I have become comfortably numb" Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd

The letter confirmed my deepest fears: That I was a mistake that needed to be forgotten. I tried to remind myself of all the talks I had with Dr. Pereira about my mom and the likelihood that she wouldn't want to reconnect or respond. Not even those discussions could take away the sting of my mom's- no, the woman who gave birth to me- words. I read the letter over and over again. I got phone calls, but I let my phone ring. I got texts, but I left them unread.

Sunday, I was sitting outside on my deck reading the letter again as Justine chased after squirrels. I was so engrossed in the letter, I didn't realize someone was knocking on the fence until Justine started barking and running to the fence that lead to the front yard. I got up and followed her, looking around my backyard for stray balls. Sometimes the neighbor's kid had balls go over the fence, but I didn't see any.

"Who is it?" I asked, cautiously.

"It's Ethan."

I opened the gate and looked at him in confusion.

"I heard Justine from the front door so I figured you were out here too." He explained. "Can we talk?" He asked.

I nodded and let him in. I quickly walked to the chair I was sitting in, grabbing the letter and tucking it into my pocket carefully. I sat down before he sat beside me, clearing his throat, his nervous tick, before starting.

"You were right Lily; it wasn't fair you were put in the middle of Megan's and my disagreement. I'm sorry." When I didn't say anything, just watched him, he continued. "I can't say my feelings weren't involved when we- when I- came up with the rules, but they were only for EJ's protection. The rules were to keep Megan honest not control or punish her."

"Are you sure? Because that's what she made it sound like and the fact that you don't feel a need to follow them makes it seem that way too." I pointed out, bluntly.

He looked me directly in the eye. "You are the only person I didn't follow the rules with. That's only because I know whatever happens between us, you will always be a part of EJ's life." 

When I nodded in agreement, he continued. "It was never just about the cheating with Megan. It was her using EJ and leaving him with a stranger to cover up her lies. I didn't trust her to do the right thing with EJ anymore after everything happened."

I pursed my lips at the stranger comment, but because I lived the danger of being left with someone my dad thought he could trust, I let that part go.

"You told me you trusted her when we talked about having the right timing for a relationship. If you trust her now, why do you still need the rules?" I questioned him.

"We don't. After I dropped EJ off today, we eliminated them." Ethan replied.

"Ok."

"And so we're all on the same page, I made it clear that she has no right or reason to approach you anymore."

"Oh, so she's not allowed to talk to me?" I huffed, rolling my eyes.

He waited until I looked back at him to answer. "About things pertaining to our parenting? No. I've never done that with Dave; she shouldn't have done it with you."

"Fine." I replied, looking off.

"Lily." He said. I turned back to him.

"I understand we're going to have disagreements, but I don't want to break up or not hear from you because of them. What do I need to do to ensure this won't happen again?" He asked, sincerely.

"Don't try to exclude me. I get it if you don't want Megan talking to me about you two's parenting, but you need to keep me informed like I asked." I leveled with him.

"Done." He said, reaching over for my hand, squeezing it in his. His slight touch had my whole body responding. I quickly stood up, dropping his hand.

"I need to get Justine inside. Can we catch up another day?" I asked him.

"Sure." He stood up too. He brought me close for a hug. I hugged him briefly before calling Justine to go inside.

After he left, I climbed in bed and reread the letter. I don't know why: the woman who gave birth to me was brutally blunt in her letter. There wasn't anything to dissect, no double meanings, no hope. My phone rang, breaking my trance from the letter. I saw it was Trevor, and I answered.

"Hey."

"Hey. Are you ok?" He asked me.

"I'm fine. Why?" I sat up, forcing cheerfulness in my voice. 

"Do you know about Christian?"

I winced, thinking about Christian and his drug use and what could have possibly happen to compell Trevor to call and ask me about him.

"No. No idea. What happened? Is he ok?" I asked.

"Um, yeah. He's ok. He's dating your friend. Mia Morris." Trevor informed me.

I felt disgust, and then anger. "You really called to tell me that?"

"I figured you already knew or were going to find out since they were pictured together. I wanted to check on you."

"Why?" I scoffed.

"What do you mean why?"

"Why do you care?"

"Because you're my friend." He said, matter of factly.

"Was I your friend when you told Christian I slept with Richard?" I confronted him.

He was silent for a minute.

"Exactly. I find it odd that you talked shit about me to Christian and now you want to see if 'I'm ok' over Christian. Sounds like you're just trying to rub it in." I accused him.

"I'm not Lily. I fucked up a lot and I thought you forgiven me for it. I'm not going to lie, I hate Christian. I hate that you were with him. I hate that I have to even talk about him, but I'm trying to be a good friend to you now."

"You don't have to talk about Christian or be here for me. I don't care about him or who or what he does. I'm good."

"Good. I'm here for you if you need me."

"I don't need you." I told him, curtly.

"Fine Lily. I'll let you go." He said, just as curt. He hung up before I could say anything else. 

I put my phone on my night stand and stared at the letter again.  I finally got up and put it away in my closet in a storage container. I buried the letter, and any feelings or emotions associated with it, deep and forgot about it. I refused to give anymore time and energy to someone who didn't give a fuck about me. I decided right then and there not to care anymore. I was good: I didn't need anyone.

Monday morning dragged by as I went grocery shopping. When I got to work, Dr. Clayton was holed up in the team lead office and Q told me he had been for majority of the morning. I suppressed my annoyance and spent my time observing and coaching our interns until he left. When I got off, Ethan text me about going out sometime this week. I told him I would get back to him before I went home and took Justine out for a run.

Tuesday morning, I got up, fed Justine, and headed to the gym. Dino was there, but I ignored her and went to her dad's class, partnering with a random guy who I never seen at the gym before. As I left after my workout, Dino approached me.

"Hey Lily. Can we talk for a minute?" She asked me.

"I really don't have a minute." I said, continuing to walk faster.

"It'll be quick. We can talk on the way out." she said, following me.

I sighed heavily but stopped to look at her, waiting for her to rub it in that she and Jake were engaged or expecting-

"Mia is seeing Christian. I hope you believe me when I say I had no idea this was going on until he invited her to his album release." she informed me.

"I couldn't care less about what hoe Christian is fucking."

She blanched. "If I was you-"

"You're not me." I cut her off. "I don't concern myself with my ex or my boyfriend's ex. Are you done?" I asked, my voice dripping with disdain.

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Yeah, I'm done."

I turned on my heel and continued my march to my car and went to work. That day, Amber text me and asked if I was ok. I replied that I was fine and didn't respond to anymore of her texts bashing Mia or wanting me to call. I focused on my work, staying late to work out the schedule for 4th of July. Ethan called me, but I told him I was working late and would call him back later. 

Wednesday morning, I got a call from Rocky asking me if I had time to talk. When I agreed, she invited me over after I got off. On the way, I called Ethan and we made plans to have dinner Thursday night. I suggested a Thai restaurant I went to when I needed to get out the clinic. It was close and fast and I knew we would be in and out. I already had in my mind what I was going to order to make the date even quicker. 

When I got to Rocky's house, she was holding Ace. He was wrapped up in his blanket, wide eyes taking in everything. I took him and cuddled him close, loving his smell and rubbing my fingers over his soft curls. 

"I'm sorry. I've been a major bitch to you and you don't deserve it." Rocky apologized.

"So why have you been acting like a bitch?" I asked her, looking away from Ace to her.

"A combination of hormones, lack of sleep, and the break up. I'm barely holding it together."

"You're fine with everyone else. You have Peyton throwing you girls nights and sending me away. Why are you taking it out on me?"

She fidgeted uncomfortably. "It might be a little jealousy. You have a successful career, a supportive family and an amazing new boyfriend. You're doing so great while I just had a kid and my life is... A mess." She admitted honesty.

Her words set me off. "Your life is not a mess because you have a kid! You have a career! You have a supportive family! You had an amazing boyfriend! Really, you had two: Brandon and Forrest but you sabotaged them because you don't know what you want! That has nothing to do with Ace and everything to do with you! Figure out what you want!" I said, harshly. While she blinked back tears, I handed Ace back and I got up and left.

I didn't sleep that night. I tossed and turned. When I did finally fall asleep, I felt like I slept maybe a few hours before my phone ringing woke me up. It was Bianca, but I ignored it and tried to go back to sleep. Restless and unable to sleep, I got up and went to the gym before going to work.

After work, I headed straight to the restaurant to met Ethan, not changing my clothes nor fixing my hair or make-up. I had no desire to look in the mirror, so Ethan was just going to have to deal with wrinkled scrubs, haphazard ponytail and dry, bare face me. When I arrived, he was already sitting in a booth, waiting for me. He stood up, greeting me with a hug, not making any comments on my appearance.

"Do you want to order the sampler to share?" Ethan asked me.

"No. I want the Thai spicy soup."

"That's it?" He said, surprised.

"Yep. Not very hungry."

"Ok."

He ordered my soup and noddle stir fry and coconut curry from himself. As I fiddled with my stir in my tea, Ethan called my name.

"Yeah. What's up?" I responded.

"Did you hear me?" He said.

"No. Sorry. What did you say?"

He watched me for a moment before speaking. "Your friend Jordan tagged us on Facebook about going out." 

I sighed. I hadn't been on any social media all week. I barely responded to texts. "I told everyone we are together. Is that a problem?"

"Not at all. She posted about us all going out together on a group date."

"Just ignore her. She wants a group of people to show off her engagement ring to." I said as our food was placed in front of us.

"I got us Gary Clark Jr tickets. I mentioned it to Will already: we can make it a group." He told me.

"We'll see." I said, noncommittally.

"Are you ok?" He asked me.

"Yeah. Just hungry." I said, grabbing my spoon to eat.

"I thought you weren't that hungry." He studied me closely now, scanning my face before looking into my eyes.

I focused on my food. "I am now."

I ate my soup, barley tasting it. As we ate, he talked to me about EJ's birthday party. He told me they were going to stay at the hotel over the weekend and he rented an extra room if I wanted to stay. I declined, saying I would see him at the party on Saturday. I finished my small cup of soup and waited quietly for Ethan to finish.

"Do you want to try anything?" He motioned to his plate.

I shook my head. "No. I'm ready whenever you are."

"Is something wrong?" He stared at me, inquisitively.

"No. I'm just tired." I said, looking away when his gaze got too intense.

"Ok." He said simply, signaling the waiter for the check. After he had his food packed up and paid the bill he walked me to my car. I went in for a brief hug, but he locked me into his embrace.

"Goodnight." He said into my hair.

"Yeah. You too." I pulled away and got into my car. By the time I got home, I got a new texts from him.

Ethan: If tonight was really about you being tired, I hope you have a good night sleep. 

Ethan: If it wasn't, let me know what I can do to help or fix whatever is wrong. I understand if you're having second thoughts about us. I want you to be happy and if that's not with me, we don't need to be together. Let me know what you want to do.

The tears I been fighting all week flooded my eyes as I read the text. I didn't know how to be happy when I was trying not to feel anything at all. I didn't know what I wanted to do. I didn't even blame him for wanting to leave me, but the thought of losing him when I just got him broke me. I got into bed and cried myself to sleep. 

When I woke up, my eyes were red and puffy and I looked a complete mess. I pulled myself together the best I could and got ready for my appointment. I grabbed the letter from the woman who gave birth to me before I left. 

When Dr. Pereira ushered me into her office, I handed her the letter before she could ask what was wrong. As she read it over, I recalled the letter in my head. By now, I had it memorized. I knew every letter, word and punctuation. The words were now branded on me, like a tattoo, reminding me I was a mistake and I would never be good enough. My eyes filled with tears again as the emotions I thought I buried inside me built up. I took a deep breath, trying to bury them again.

Dr. Pereira  sat the letter down, and looked up at me, her eyes full of worry. "How are you dealing with this Lily?"

"We talked about this being a possibility. I knew she may not want to talk to me." I replied, trying to convince myself and her.

"Just because we talked about it doesn't make it any easier. How do you feel about her response?"

"Nothing." I supplied.

"Nothing at all?" She questioned.

"That's right. She made it clear she didn't want to be my mom when she decided to give me up. I've gotten along 23 years without her." I said, as anger tears fell from my eyes. I wiped them away, quickly. "I know I'm just a mistake, but don't I deserve to know why?"

"You are not a mistake. Her decisions then and now are not a reflection of you." Dr. Pereira told me sternly.

"I know that! I understand if she was too weak or had no choice about raising me, but why won't she just talk to me now? I don't need her in my life. I'm not asking her to be in my life. I just want to know my past. Why aren't I worthy of a conversation?" I cried, bitterly.

"For whatever reasons, she can't face her own past. That has nothing to do with you. You, and only you, determine your worth. Do not give anyone that power." She advised, handing me a box of Kleenex.

"I know that too! I don't know why I care. Why can't I get passed this?" I muttered, taking the Kleenex to clean my face.

"You can care. You can be angry or sad; be whatever you're feeling. Acknowledge your feelings so you can heal and move on. What you can't do is take her problems and make them your own. Her choices do not define you. That's how you get passed it."

I nodded. Once I calmed down, she handed me back the letter, asking what I planned to do with it. I shrugged and tucked it into my purse. I wasn't going to let the letter or the woman who gave birth to me define me anymore, but I did need to mourn it and the death of the childhood dream I had of reconnecting with her. Dr. Pereira asked me if I shared the letter with anyone else. I told her I haven't and admitted that I've been internalizing, lashing out, and pushing people away instead.

"What does that accomplish besides hurting the people that care about you and yourself?" Dr. Pereira asked me.

"Nothing." I took a shaky breath, finally understanding I couldn't continue to push people away and expect them to stick around. Tears threatened to fall again as I thought about Ethan's texts last night but I told myself if he gave me a chance, I would make it right.

When I left, I called Ethan. He didn't answer, so I left a voicemail to give me a call back. While I was in my team huddle, he returned my call. As soon as I finished, I tried to call him again with no answer. On my lunch, I saw that he text me he was off and to call when I had the chance.

"Hello?" He answered on the first ring.

"Hey Ethan. Are you busy tonight?

"I still have that extra room at Great Wolf Lodge. I was getting ready to head up there."

"Oh. Ok. I want to talk to you, but we can wait until tomorrow, if you have time after EJ's party."

"I'd rather talk to you tonight. I can meet up with you once you get off."

"As long as it's not an inconvenience"

"Talking to you is never an inconvenience. I'll meet you at your place?"

"Yes."

I got off the phone, relieved he was willing to hear me out, but debating whether to show him the letter. Part of me just wanted to apologize and tell him I had a rough week, but he deserved an explanation not an excuse. Another part of me was embarrassed and ashamed the woman who gave birth to me wanted nothing to do with me, but I reminded myself that her actions were not a reflection of me. I decided to start with an apology and then go from there.

When I got home, he was already out front, waiting for me. I let him in and we sat on the living room couch.

"I'm sorry. I don't want to break up. I should have never threatened it. I've been having second thoughts about myself, but never about you." I started.

"Why are you having second thoughts about yourself?" He asked me, concerned.

I retrieved the letter from my purse and handed it to him. When he finished reading, he looked up at me, compassion in his eyes.

"When did you receive this?" He said, holding up the letter.

"Last Saturday." I admitted.

He moved closer to me on the couch. "I was giving you space because I thought you were having second thoughts. I'm so sorry Lily." He said, wrapping his arms around me.

"No. I'm sorry I pushed you away." I said, feeling warmth and comfort in his arms as he held me.

"You know you can come to me about anything." He rubbed up and down my shoulders.

"I know. It just... hard. It's bad enough my mom didn't- couldn't raise me. The fact that she won't even talk to me-" I broke up, the grief hitting me all over again. I let it come this time, crying on Ethan's shirt as he held me even tighter.

"It's her lost not having you in her life." He said simply, but so genuinely, I believed him.

I nodded, sobbing softly. He rubbed my back as he held me, stroking my hair, occasionally pressing a kiss against my forehead as I cried. It was more comforting than talking. After awhile, my tears stopped and I dozed off in his arms, exhaustion finally catching up with me.

I woke up early the next morning, still in Ethan's arms. I untangled myself from his embrace, which caused him to wake up.

"Hey. Good morning." I said, sitting up. "Did you sleep ok?"

He nodded as he studied my face. "How'd you sleep?" He asked in a deep raspy voice.

"Honestly? The best sleep I had all week." I admitted, smoothing out his dress shirt that I cried all over. "I have a t-shirt you can borrow."

"That's ok. I have my clothes in the truck for the party." He said as he stretched out.

I looked up at him, suddenly. "Great Wolf Lodge. Didn't you have a room last night?"

He shrugged. "We can check in anytime today. You can stay tonight if you want."

"EJ may not put it together, but your family is definitely going to notice if I spend the night with you." I pointed out.

"They're traditional, but I don't think they'd be scandalized if my girlfriend spends the night with me."

I smiled. "So you told your parents about us?"

"My dad had an idea and he told my mom."

"How'd your dad find out?"

He blushed, his light skin redden. "I went to him for advice on how to get you to change your mind about dating me."

I gasped. "What did he say?"

"I rather not say." He smirked.

"Did it work?" I grinned at him.

"So far."

"So good." I responded before leaning in for a kiss.

Masterpiece

"I still fall on my face sometimes and I
Can't color inside the lines 'cause
I'm perfectly incomplete
I'm still working on my masterpiece and I
I wanna hang with the greatest gotta
Way to go, but it's worth the wait, no
You haven't seen the best of me
I'm still working on my masterpiece and I
Still workin' on my masterpiece" Masterpiece by Jessie J

"Lily!" Monica waved at me as Sammy, Amanda and I searched for their table in the back. I waved back before heading over. Staci had already made it and was chatting to a girl sitting next to Monica.

Monica introduced her sister Deanna, and two of her friends Tori and Michelle.

"Happy Zaddy day!" Deanna greeted us.

"Zaddy?" I asked, with a raised eyebrow.

"That's right. All the guys with kids should be at home with them, leaving only zaddys at the club." Monica explained. "I'm playing your wing women to find you one." She said, scooping out the lounge.

I laughed. "I don't need a wing women. Amanda?" I turned to her, offering her Monica's services.

"I'm her wing woman." Sammy grabbed her arm. "I already have Alvarez on the way."

I looked at Staci. "Daniel is picking me up in a few hours." She smiled.

"Tori's got a boyfriend, Michelle has too many men, and my sister is a lost cause so you get my expertise." Monica said as I sat beside her.

"I have a boyfriend, so I have to decline." I admitted to her. When Sammy and Staci turned to me, surprise all over there face, I took a deep breath.

"Ethan and I are dating. We made it official last weekend." I declared.

"I should have known you liked him! You got way too pressed when I said he was fine." Staci laughed.

"Yeah, I like him. He likes me. We're together now. Say whatever you want to say now because this is the last time I'm gonna hear any shit about us." I said, warily.

"Um... Congratulations." Monica said, perplexed as she looked between us. "Is there a reason we shouldn't like him?"

"I don't think so, but let's see." I said, looking at Sammy specifically.

She put her hands up in mock surrender. "I have nothing bad to say about Ethan. If you like it, I love it."

"Thank you." I nodded, gratefully.

"What about Trevor?" Amanda spoke up, meekly.

I stiffened. "What about him?"

"He wants you ba-" Amanda started.

I stopped her. "He just wants to be friends again."

Sammy and Amanda shared a look. "Have you told him about Ethan?" Sammy continued.

"I just told you. I told my brother and my dad this weekend. I tell him next time I speak to him." I defended myself.

"Ok." Sammy said.

Pop Lock and Drop It came on and Deanna did a little dance. "This is my song!" She cheered with a grin.

"Shot!!!" Monica, Tori and Michelle yelled grabbing a bottle of vodka.

"Wait? What?" Staci laughed.

"Anytime someone comments on the music, we have to take a shot." Monica explained.

"Ok..." I trailed off, thinking how hard could it be to not mention the music.

"It's hip hop dance party. Believe me, you'll comment." Tori promised me, reading my mind.

She was right. The DJ played new and classic hip hop dance songs. Monica declared Juvenile's Back that Azz as her inner hoe song and we all took another shot before getting up dancing to it. I was dancing with Monica and Sammy when Alvarez and Richard showed up.

Richard grinned while recording us with his phone. "Is that really your dad's jersey Lily?"

"Yeah." I said.

"So you're up here twerking in your dad's jersey on Father's day?" He grinned.

"Yep, so you better not post that online." I smiled at him, dancing to the ground before dancing back up.

"This is live. Make your daddy proud!" Richard laughed. I made a move to snatch his phone away, but he ducked, running around the table. Sammy cut him off and grabbed his phone from him. She sat down with Richard's phone and he sat beside her, a sheepish smile on his face.

"I will never put you on live without your consent again." He said, apologetically. "Can I get my phone back?"

"Hell no. Let's see what else you've been up to." Sammy grinned at him.

"Nothing." He laughed at her as they looked over his phone.

I turned away from them and watched Alvarez and Amanda. They were huddled up too, talking over the menu.

"You wanna invite Ethan?" Monica asked as she sat next to me.

I frowned up as I thought about the earlier scene with Megan and EJ. "He's a dad so he's spending time with his son and his son's mom."

"You hate his kid!" Her friend Michelle gasped at me.

"No. His son is awesome. We hang out all the time." I shook my head vehemently.

"So you hate his baby momma?" Tori guessed.

"No, although I think she doesn't like me." I said before I told them what happened this morning.

"So she didn't know you two were dating, but you are already hanging out with her son?" Deanna jumped in.

"No. I mean yes, but I knew EJ before I even knew Ethan. I used to babysit him for her." I explained.

"What?" Monica gasped.

"No. Not like that!!!" I interjected.

"Please explain, because this is sounding like a bad porno." Deanna smirked.

Flustered, I detailed how I came into EJ's and Ethan's life through Megan and how Ethan and I recently decided to date. 

"He already told his friends about us, but apparently not Megan and definitely not EJ. I don't get why it's a big deal to tell them." I finished.

"Because you're not a parent." Deanna said bluntly.

I was taken aback, and Monica sent her a look.

"Neither are you, so hush." Deanna pointed at her before turning to me. "Telling his friends is a lot different than telling his family, especially his kid. I don't even introduce my kids to the man I'm dating until I'm sure he's going to be a permanent part of my life. Y'all only been dating a week."

I turned to Staci for confirmation and she nodded. "Cherish hasn't meet any guy that I dated." She started. "I know it's different because you already have a relationship with EJ, but your relationship with him is going to change."

"How?" I pouted.

"From his babysitter to potential stepmom." Deanna scoffed.

"Shut up Deanna." Monica glared at her. Deanna grabbed her drink and sipped on it, rolling her eyes.

"You won't just be his friend, but his dad's girlfriend. Think about it." Staci pointed out, gently.

"Fuck." I said, grabbing my drink and rubbing my temples.

"Just give it some time and follow Ethan's lead on this one." Staci comforted me. "And get his key back from her. My ex doesn't have a key to my place." Staci said with a teasing smile.

I nodded and downed my drink before pulling out my phone. I wanted to text Ethan, but I didn't want to intrude on his father's day. I focused on my friends and dancing and drinking instead. We challenged each other on difference dances as we took shots. I did the jerk, the Dougie and Sammy and I did the Juju dance on Richard's Snapchat.

When the dance floor started spinning as I did the ChaCha slide, I decided to call it a night. Or day considering it was only 6pm. On my Uber drive home, Trevor tried to video call me. I ignored it, saying I would talk to him when I was sober. When I got home, I fed Justine and collapsed in bed, still fully dressed.

When my phone beeped I grabbed it, thinking it might be Ethan. It was Trevor: he sent me a picture of him with a big, beautiful dog. I video called him back right away.

"Wow. You look awful. Too much turning up for daddy?" Trevor asked me, with a grin.

"Shut up!" I exclaimed pulling my hair back. "You got a dog?"

"I got a dog." He confirmed, with a smile as he turned the phone around. I got a quick glimpse at his apartment before it focused on the dog.

"Ohmygosh. He's adorable! Is it a he? What is he? How'd you get him?"

"It's a he. He's a border collie lab mix. His name is Thor-"

"Thor?" I laughed.

"Yes. Chris's son is a hardcore Avenger fan. He always makes me the bad guy when we play action figures."

"Sounds about right." I laughed.

"Anyway..." He smiled before continuing, "Chris got a dog for his son and turns out his daughter is severely allergic. I took him so his son can still see him and play with him from time to time."

"And you have someone to cuddle with." I joked.

"He's not a big cuddler. He won't even get in my bed. Chris had him in training for weeks before he brought him home. Watch this. Lay down.... Stay... Sit....Watch me... Good boy." Trevor commanded and complimented him before petting him and giving him a treat.

"He's too cute." I gushed as Thor sat at Trevor's feet. "And laid back. The complete opposite of Justine."

"I can't wait to get the two of them together. It should definitely be interesting."

"Aww, weren't you in Wichita Falls today? You should have swung by on your way back to Austin."

"I wasn't in Wichita Falls this weekend."

"You didn't go to your dad's grave with your mom?"

"No. You know why I stopped doing that." He said matter of factly.

I sighed. "You need to get over it."

"Get over it?' He asked, his face marred with anger.

"Forgive her." I cleaned up, tiredly.

"I have. Forgive and forget. That's what I'm doing." He said.

"That's your mom Trevor. You can't forget her."

"So far so good. My feelings haven't changed because we're not together. I can't believe you're defending her."

"I'm not defending her. I'm defending you. Sometimes people just do the best they can. You cutting her off doesn't change anything but you not having a relationship with her. Can you live with that?"

"Yeah I can. If that's her best, I rather not have a relationship with her."

I decided to let it go. I thought about Amanda questioning me if I told him about Ethan. I should have but it was awkward between us and I was exhausted. I begged off the phone instead to get some sleep. He told me to take some Tylenol, drink some water and wished me a good night. I was too tired to do anything but place my phone on my charger and I passed out.

I woke up at 5am the next morning, wincing at my phone as I checked the time, my head throbbing.  I had a missed call and a few texts from Ethan. I text him back that I was up and to call me when he was up too. I was still laying in bed when my phone rang. It was Ethan so I picked it up.

"Can I come over so I can make you breakfast?" He asked.

"You don't have to. We can just talk." I said, the thought of getting out of bed to let him in daunting.

"I want to see you." He said simply.

"Sure." I grumbled, sitting up.

"Be there in 20 minutes."

I rolled out of bed and into the shower, hoping the hot water would help me feel better. I changed into sweatpants and a shirt and went into the kitchen. I brewed some coffee, dry swallowed 2 Tylenol before letting Justine outside. My headache had lessened considerably as I got Justine breakfast and the door bell rang.

"Hey." I squinted at the sun as I let Ethan in.

"Good morning." He said, walking in with an identical box that EJ carried to his house the previous morning. He was already dressed, looking sharp in a black suit.

"More like shitty morning." I said, despite being intrigued by the box. "Did you bring me EJ's half a scone?"

"I got you two of your own. I prefer the cinnamon, but peach is a favorite." He told me as he walked to the kitchen. "I figured it'll be good with breakfast."

"I don't have much food. I normally grocery shop today." I warned as he sat the box down on the kitchen table and removed his suit jacket. I took it from him to hang in my hallway closet.

"You have eggs and cheese. How about an omelet with the scone?" He offered.

"Or a scone before the omelet." I said, sitting at the table and ripping open the box. The smell of sweet bread instantly made me feel better and I reached for the peach one first. It was incredible- light and tender with a delicious almond glaze. I normally didn't like scones but the peaches burst with flavor and made it more moist than scones I had in the past.

"Rough night?" He asked me, getting two coffee mugs from my cupboard.

"Rough day. Sunday Funday." I said over a mouthful of scone. I already had half of it gone.

"I never understood that concept. Technically, Sunday is still a work night. Why go out and drink, even if it's in the day?" He pondered, handing me my cup of coffee.

"Now you tell me after I fell into the trap." I said, sarcastically. "Can you pass me some cream? In the door." I instructed him.

He did and I thanked him.

"I don't have half and half, but there's whole milk." I told him.

"Thanks." He said, cracking eggs into a bowl. I know I should have offered to help, but the coffee and scone was making me feel better and clearer: I needed to talk to him while my mind was still clear.

"Did you have to tell Megan about us yesterday?" I asked, putting the other scone away.

"She already knew about us." He said, beating eggs.

"Oh. She seemed surprised to see me at your house."

"We established rules for dating when we broke up to protect EJ. We decided to keep our dating life separate from him until we were in a committed relationship for at least 3 months." Ethan explained, turning away from me and to the stove to cook the eggs.

"How separate?" I asked, thinking about how he did not want to be affectionate in front of EJ.

"Completely separate. No meeting him. No home visits whether he's there or not. No contact with him at all." Ethan answered.

"Oh wow. We broke all those rules. A lot." I sighed, rubbing my temples as my headache came back.

No wonder Megan looked so pissed. 

"I know but that rule is not relevant to us because you're already a part of EJ's life. I'll convince Megan the same." He said as he flipped the eggs and added cheese.

"So in the meantime, do we need to just... follow the rules?" I asked, my appetite gone thinking about missing EJ's games and his birthday party and not being able to see him for 3 months.

"No. I'll handle it." He said, confidently as he grabbed a plate from my cabinet.

I waited until he was placing the omelet in front of me to look him in the eyes. "Ok. Keep me updated. Let me know what you need from me, ok?"

"Always." He said, leaning in for a chaise kiss on my lips. I deepened the kiss, his mouth all minty and fresh. I pulled back abruptly.

"What's wrong?" He asked, looking me over, concerned.

"Um, nothing. Do I have gross coffee breath?" I asked.

"Not at all. You taste like peaches and cream." He complimented me.

I giggled. "That's Staci's inner hoe songs"

"Staci's inner hoe song?" He asked confused.

"Yep. It's a song that makes your inner hoe come out."

"Do you have one?" he smirked at me.

"I have like 7." I smiled as I pulled him in for a kiss.

"What are they?" he asked against my lips.

"I'm not telling." I said, kissing him.

We spent 5 minutes making out in the kitchen until he pulled away to let me eat. We shared the omelet and the rest of the scones before he had to head into work. I got up and finished my laundry before I went to work as well.

Although I had a rough morning, the rest of the week went by smoothly. Peyton invited me, Amber, Sammy and Jordan to a girls night in at Rocky's house on Friday. I hadn't spoke to Rocky or Amber since I told them about Ethan, but I agreed to go figuring it'll be good to see them both and clear the air.

EJ was spending his week out of school with his grandparents until his basketball camp started next week, so Ethan and I were able to go on a date Wednesday night. Since he mentioned his grandfather told him he was a good drawer when he was younger, I decided to take him to art studio that had  instructor led BYOB classes. It was my first time doing anything outside of art class in school and I was super excited. At the studio, after 2 small plastic cups of Pinot Grigio and one sorry attempt at recreating a bouquet of summer flowers, my excitement waned.

"I suck at this." I complained to Ethan, eying his perfect painting. He looked over at mine and gave me a little smile. "I wasn't going to say anything but-"

"Ethan!" I cut him off, narrowing my eyes at him.

"What? I was just agreeing with you."

"That I suck?" I said, in faux outrage.

Our instructor, Holly, joined our conversation as she made her round around the room. "I have so many people that come in, underestimating themselves and make the most wonderful paintings."

"No. She overestimated herself and couldn't even paint a straight line." Ethan commented as Holly took in my poor painting.

I took my brush and made a white line over his flower arrangement.

"Is that straight enough for you?" I taunted him. He chuckled and Holly frowned at me as she left.

I gave up on my painting and poured my third glass of wine. I watched him as he turned the white streak into a lily in the arrangement.

"Aww, is that for me?" I smiled, pleased.

"No. It's because of you. I had to incorporate your vandalism somehow."

"Vandalism is a little extreme." I laughed. "You could have turned it into anything, but you choose a lily. My name."

"It couldn't be anything. It had to be a white flower."

"White roses, tulips..."

"Daisies, carnations, baby's breath." The woman who was clearly ease-dropping next to us listed with a smile.

"Out of all the white flowers, you choose a lily. Why is that?" I teased, lightly.

"Because your constantly on my mind." Ethan said, looking over at me. I couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but it took it as a compliment.

"You should call it 'Lily: The prettiest flower of the bunch'." I said dreamy, finishing my wine.

"You should finish your painting."

"Nah, I'm a true artist! Instructions stifle my creativity. I must freestyle. I can't do this paint by number, step by step bullshit." I declared, as Holly walked by, shooting me a look. Ethan gave her an apologetic smile and the lady next to me and I giggled.

"Do you want to pick up a sandwich at Subway? Be around your type of people?" Ethan asked as we left with our paintings.

"Huh?" I asked, confused.

"Sandwich artists. You can freestyle with them."

"Shut up Ethan!" I laughed, grabbing his arm.

We did end up going to Subway and I showcased my artistic abilities in crafting a delicious Subway melt. Had to admit, the sandwich I created was much better than my painting. When Ethan dropped me home, I grabbed his painting from the backseat instead of my own. He walked me to the door and I turned the painting around so he wouldn't notice it was his. I sat it down to give him a kiss goodnight. We held each other close, kissing each other hungrily.

"You wanna come inside?" I asked him between kisses.

"I can't."

"Yes you can. 10 minutes."

"We spent 10 minutes out here already."

"5?" I bargained. When he pulled away I sighed. "Fine. 30 minutes."

"You're horrible at negotiations."

I ran my hands up his chest. "I know. Come inside and teach me." I brushed my lips against his, seductively.

"Lily..." He moaned and I grinned against his mouth, feeling sexy and powerful. I gave him one last kiss before I pulled away instead of testing his resolve.

"Alright. Goodnight Ethan." I said unlocking my door.

"Goodnight. Enjoy 'Lily: The prettiest flower of the bunch'." He smiled at me.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." I smiled back, grabbing his painting before I went inside. I took the painting upstairs to my study where the print he given me hung on the wall. I put the painting up before I went downstairs to get ready for bed.

Friday night, I headed to Rocky's house after I went home, fed Justine and changed. I was the last to arrive and Peyton let me in, leading me into the den. She had 4 different station set up: Pedicures, manicures, facials and mediation.

"Hey everyone." I smiled and waved at the girls. Everyone was wearing robs and were split up among the stations. I changed into a rob as well and grabbed a glass of champagne and joined Rocky and Peyton at the facial station. I gave Rocky a smile before looking over the 3 different facial mask.

"What is all this?" I asked, stirring the brown colored goop.

"Ace's poop." Rocky deadpanned. I threw down the brush immediately.

"It's avocado and cocoa for moisturizing, honey and yeast for acne, and banana for sensitive skin." Peyton explained with a smile as Rocky hid her smile.

"Nice Rocky." I grinned at her as I grabbed the honey and yeast mask. I painted it on my face carefully.

"I was telling everyone we need to do a group outing with the men folk next time." Jordan filled me in.

"Yeah?" I said, sipping my champagne.

"I know it's pretty new with Uriel-" Jordan started.

"I'm not seeing Uriel, but I'll definitely invite Ethan. We're dating now." I corrected her.

"Really? That's Awesome!" Jordan gushed. "So it'll be you and Ethan, me and Blake, Rocky and Forrest, Sammy and Corey, Peyton and Chris, Amber and Will-"

I looked over at Rocky and she heaved a heavy sigh. "Forrest and I aren't seeing each other anymore." Rocky confessed.

"What? Blake thought something was up with Forrest. When did you break up?" Jordan gasped.

"When he went to Shreveport." Rocky confirmed. I shook my head, but keep my mouth shut.

"Did you want to say something Lily?" Rocky asked me, challengingly.

"Absolutely not. In fact, I want to say sorry to you and anyone else who's relationship I interfered with. I'm now realizing even if my intentions were good, it was none of my business. So I apologize and will only offer my support from now on." I promised.

"Real subtle Lily." Rocky snorted, getting up to go to her bedroom. I got up to follow her, but Peyton waved me off. I  thought about following her anyway, but I sat back down. I had no idea what was going on between Rocky and me, but I couldn't solve it unless she came to me to address it. Until then, I couldn't worry about it.

"You're right Lily. I'm sorry." Amber spoke up. "I wish you and Ethan the best. And since Will and Ethan are besties, we should double date."

"Hey, don't forget the group date!" Jordan blurted.

"That too." Amber laughed.

They began to discuss different date options as I washes my face. Rocky eventually came back with Ace and I focused on him and the girls.

As we began to head out, Jordan pulled me aside and asked if we could get together. I told her Staci, her daughter Cherish and I were going shopping at the boutique where Bianca's clothes were finally hitting the shelves on Saturday. She agreed to come and we all meet up the following morning.

"Blake felt Forrest wasn't telling him everything." Jordan sighed when I explained what I knew regarding the break up.

"Yeah, I know. It just sucks because Forrest is basically cutting me off and Rocky is lashing out at me. It's hard but I have to stay out of it. People meddling in my relationship made me see how annoying and frustrating it is when I do it." I explained.

"I hear you. I completely understand." Jordan nodded. "So tell me about Ethan!"

As we picked out and tried on clothes, I told her we made it official 2 weeks ago so it was brand new but I enjoyed being around him so much. I also told Staci about Megan and Ethan's 3 month rule and how Ethan was trying to get Megan to exclude me from it.

"I wouldn't. Especially since he already broke the rule." Staci said.

"I get that, but if the rule is to protect EJ, I'm already in his life. What's the point of making me wait 3 months?"

"To be petty. Which, I am." Staci grinned.

I laughed at her and we checked out and went our separate ways. I called Bianca, raving over the clothes and she immediately chastised me, saying she could have sent whatever I wanted.

"Girl, you have to make sells so they will keep ordering your clothes. Don't give freebies to anyone!" I ordered her.

"Not even family?" she chuckled

"Especially not family! They'll bleed you dry first! But don't send any to celebrities either. I never understood that- they have the money to buy it!"

"What did you buy?"

I gave her a run down of everything, including a black skort romper that looked even better on me than the hanger.

"I'm totally thinking where I can get Ethan to take me so I can wear that romper-" I plotted, excitedly.

"Ethan? He would be taking you out why?" she asked, knowingly.

"Because he's my boyfriend, so unless he wants me to get another one, he should stick close to me in that romper." I revealed, playfully.

"I'm so sick of you I swear! How are you going to have a boyfriend and I didn't even know you were dating him?"

"Because I wanted to figure things out for myself first. I did, and we're together. Now I'm sharing with you." I explained.

"The only reason I'm not upset is at least I somewhat know him and you are giving me all the details."

I detailed all the dates we've been on so far. "I know he comes off as cold or taciturn, but he's really not. He's just reserved until he gets to know you and then he's so sweet and kind and funny. You'll see it."

"I don't have to see it if he has you gushing like that. It's kinda gross Lily."

"Aw, shut up. Nobody's gushing." I laughed before she had to go and we said our goodbyes.

That afternoon, I asked Ethan if Megan changed her mind about the 3 month rule, and he said she would. I offered to stay home or to talk to Megan to assure her our relationship wouldn't effect EJ in any way, but he shut both down, reminding me that he would handle it.

I headed to EJ's basketball game, separately from Ethan and EJ, even though Ethan offered to pick me up. I didn't want to rub it in that we were breaking the rules anymore than me being there would, so I tried to keep my distance. Ethan did no such thing, moving from his spot next to Megan and sitting next to me instead. He was wearing the hoodie I ordered for him and handed me mine too.

"You don't want to put it on?" Ethan asked me.

"No. It's kinda warm." I lied, seeing Megan watch us in my peripheral vision. Ethan put the hat on my head, and I turned to focus on the game and not him. EJ's team had a better game than last week. Ethan told me the coach clarified at practice the comments he made after the last game and urged the team to communicate with one another more. Apparently, the talk worked because they beat the other team, 44-37.

"We'll see how they look when they play a better team." Ethan cautioned when I mentioned how much better they played.

I told Ethan I had some errands to run so I could duck out before EJ was done with his post game meeting. I was in the parking lot, pulling my keys out of my purse when Megan approached me, saying she wanted to talk.

"You should really talk to Ethan about anything." I backed away, not wanting to be in the middle.

"You obviously don't know Ethan very well if you think you can talk to him once he thinks he's right about something." Megan spoke up, confidently.

I smarted at the notion that she knew him better than me. She knew him longer, but better was debatable. "You think you're right? How do you think EJ will feel if I drop of the face of the earth and come back as his dad's girlfriend?"

"Confused. You two are already complicated enough. I don't want that." Megan replied

I frowned up, confused myself. "What? So you don't want me to wait 3 months?"

"No. I want Ethan to admit he was wrong and get rid of the rules altogether."

My face must have shown my confusion, because she asked if we can grab coffee. I nodded and followed her out the parking lot. We met up at a Starbucks. We didn't even get a drink- just grabbed an empty seat on the patio.

"Dave and I went to college together. We actually dated before I got back together with Ethan. Dave was there for me throughout my whole pregnancy while Ethan was still in school. He went to more appointments than Ethan did. When Ethan and I broke up for good and I started dating Dave, Ethan came up with the 3 month rule. He was trying to control me with rules."

My lips formed a grim line, not liking how she was painting Ethan out to look. "It's not about controlling you. It's about protecting EJ." I argued.

"Dave and I were friends for a long time, just like you and Ethan were. It was never about protecting EJ, it was about controlling and punishing me. I went along with it and his other rules out of guilt" Megan stated.

Going down memory lane with my boyfriend's ex was something I felt very invasive about. I was starting to regret meeting up with her. "That may be your perspective, but it's not Ethan's. He thinks it was about protecting EJ. You said you can't talk to him once he thinks he's right; so what's the resolution?"

"It's not fair that he gets to pick and choose what rules he gets to follow and impose on me. Maybe you can help him realize he's wrong so he can get rid of all the little rules he put in place to control me- No, sorry, protect EJ." She finished.

"I'll talk to him." I said, standing up and leaving.

"Good luck." She called after me.

I drove home, Megan's words ringing in my ears. I didn't know what all transpired between them, I never got into the details of their relationship or break up with Ethan. The control and punishment comment was a little too close for comfort for me. He already admitted when he couldn't control his feelings for me, he decided not to date me so control was important to him. He definitely tried to cut EJ off from me when I left for California and when he thought I had an abortion. I couldn't help wondering if it was for EJ's best interest, or my punishment...

I couldn't let those thoughts fester in my head. I called Ethan as soon as I got home.

"Hey Lily."

"Hey, can you talk?"

"Yes. EJ is filming a video with Jayden so I have a good 30 minutes before I should check on them."

"Good, because I talked to Megan after the game." I admitted.

"You did what?" He asked, slowly.

"Megan approached me, wanting to talk about the 3 months rule." I began.

"I told you I was handling it. Why would you talk to her?" He questioned me.

"I told her to talk to you, but she just started talking about how she wanted to get rid of the rules altogether."

"You asked me what I needed from you. I told you to stay out of it. You have a bad habit of concerning yourself with things that have nothing to do with you." He cut me off, frustration evident in his voice.

"I tried to stay out of it, but you did involve me when you have me breaking rules that you established with her!" I argued, heatedly. "She's telling me how you placed these rules to control and punish her, and she has to follow them while you pick and choose which ones you want to follow. I can't even argue with her or defend you because that's what it looks like."

"You don't know the full truth." He said, sharply.

"Exactly, because you want me to stay out of it right? From now on, I am!" I declared.

"What does that mean?" He replied, coldly.

"It means I'll decide if I want to cut off EJ for 3 months to continue dating you or if I should just stop dating you. And just so you know, I'm leaning towards the latter." I threatened before hanging up the phone.

I knew when I said it I took it too far. I didn't want to stop dating him. I just wanted to work it out. Him pointing out my weakness of over-involving myself hit a sore spot and I snapped. I knew I needed to call back and apologize, but I decided to give myself some cool down time to collect my thoughts. I was doing just that, playing on my phone when my door bell rang. I got up, anxiously, thinking it was Ethan. Instead, it was a certified mail carrier. After I signed for the certified letter, I brought it inside. I opened it up curiously and read it.

Dear Lilian,

I received both of your letters, via email and postal mail. While I am the woman that gave birth to you, I am not your mother. I do not mean to sound cruel or unkind, but I made that decision many years ago, and it will be best for everyone involved if we kept it that way. I wish you and your family the best, but please do not reach out to me again.

Paula

I re-read the letter over and over again, before I sank to the floor.

Father Figure

"Because all I ever wanted

It's in your eyes, baby

And love can't lie, no

(Greet me with the eyes of a child)

My love is always tellin' me so

(Heaven is a kiss and a smile)

Just hold on, hold on

I won't let you go, my baby

I will be your father figure

Put your tiny hand in mine

I will be your preacher teacher

Anything you have in mind, baby

I will be your father figure

I have had enough of crime

(So I am gonna love you)

'Til the end of time" Father Figure by George Michael

Me: Happy Monday. May the force be with you!

Ethan: I still can't believe you fell asleep during the movie last night.

Me: I can. I probably would still be knocked out if you hadn't woke me up. Star Wars is like my Nyquil.

Ethan: We'll try again some other time. I'll call you tonight.

Me: ok. Ttyl

I put my phone away before getting ready to go to the store to shop for my groceries for the week. As I was shopping, I got a text from Forrest. He let me know he was heading to Shreveport and was planning to spend some time with his dad. I thought about calling him to see how he was doing, but I just sent him back a text that said to let me know when he made it. I was tempted to check on Rocky, but she hadn't reached out to me so I let it go and finished shopping.

When I got into work, Dr. Fahri was in the team lead office. I barley got logged in on a tablet before he asked me to watch the floor and send Dr. Clayton in. I did what he asked, giving Dr. Clayton a questioning look which he ignored before joining Dr. Fahri in the office. I did a quick walk around the center, greeting and checking on everyone before I pulled Q aside.

"Ok, so I'm definitely picking up on the vibe between Dr. Clayton and Dr. Fahri now." I commented.

"I think it's more than that now." Q commented.

"What do you mean?"

"As someone who recently left their job, I get that vibe from him."

I frowned, the thought of Dr. Clayton leaving inconceivable. It was his 19th year with the clinic. I really hoped he wasn't letting this pettiness with Dr. Fahri force him out. After Dr. Fahri left, I approached Dr. Clayton, asking if everything was ok. He assured me it was, and changed the subject.

On the way home, I talked to Ethan about it. He advised me that until Dr. Clayton put in his notice, I shouldn't be concerned about it. He told me I should hope for the best, that maybe the two of them were hashing out their problems, but prepare for the worst. The worst for me would be losing Dr. Clayton, but Ethan made me start thinking about being the morning team lead. Not only did he suggest I negotiate a bigger salary, but also start taking notes of who I should recommend for my role.

After I felt better about the drama at my work, we made plans to hang out Wednesday with EJ and Justine. He told me he would pick us up after EJ's basketball practice. When I got home, I told Ethan goodnight and got off the phone.

When Wednesday finally arrived, I got up and decided to spend some time at the gym.

Dino was at the front of the gym when I got there. She didn't greet me, but I waved and asked if she wanted to be sparring partners. She turned me down and hightailed it out the gym. I watched her leave, a little confused, but went about my work out.

After my workout, I called Forrest to check on him. He said he was settled in at his dad's place and doing good. Again, he didn't bring Rocky up so I didn't either. I told him the phone works both ways and I expected to hear from him or I would be taking a trip to Louisiana to talk to him, after I kicked his butt. He promised he would call and let me go.

On my break, I made plans to meet up with Monica on Sunday. Her husband Trent was going to be out of town so she was doing a day party with some of her friends. When I asked her if Uriel was coming, she said no and told me she wouldn't set me up like that. I agreed to come and sent a group text to my friends that I knew didn't have father's day plans to see of they wanted to join. Sammy, Amanda and Staci all agreed and we planned to met there on Sunday.

After I got off work, I rushed home to get ready for my outing with Ethan and EJ. I changed into skinny jeans and a black tank top before I grabbed Justine's leash and clipped it on her collar. When Ethan arrived, I met him at the door with a hug before we got in his truck.

"Hey EJ! How was practice?" I smiled at him as I got in the front after putting Justine in the backseat with EJ.

"It was alright." He shrugged as we took off.

"Just alright?"

When he shrugged again, I looked at Ethan.

"His coach had him practicing setting screens when he wanted to handle the ball." Ethan started.

"You stole the ball like 50 times last Saturday. Every time you steal the ball, just drive it to the basket. Show off your handling skills then." I hyped him.

"It was only 8 times." EJ corrected me. "And coach wants me to set the play up."

"By passing to his son?" I quipped.

Ethan gave me a sideways glance before answering."I don't think if you have an open lane your coach would want you to give up an easy layup. If you can lay it up, take it. If not, set up a play." Ethan told him, diplomatically. I smiled at him; that was much better than the advise of ignoring his coach and his ball hog son that I wanted to give.

"Ok dad."

"And when you make that lay up, look at your coach and go "Balling!!!" I sang, making the universal jump shot hand motion.

"Don't do that." Ethan smiled back at me.

"Balling?" EJ smiled.

"Yeah. Like the song and dance." When EJ looked confused, I turned to Ethan. "Help me out Ethan."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He chuckled.

"Yes you do. That song was huge. I didn't even play basketball but I shouted out balling. I know you know that song E-quator"

"Equator?" EJ piped up.

"Oh yeah. That was your dad's nickname when he played basketball. Hottest place on earth." I revealed with a smile.

EJ laughed. "That pretty lame dad."

"I agree." I grinned.

"Are you going to play that song no one has heard before?" Ethan asked me.

I played the song and we spent the rest of the drive making a basketball play list and coming up with EJ's nickname until we arrived at a deck park located in the heart of Downtown Dallas. They were a lot of people around the huge park that feature a great lawn, pavilion, botanical garden, walking trails, dog park, children’s park and splash pad. We found a parking spot and walked to the great lawn.

"Can we get ice cream dad?" EJ asked as we past a line of trucks as we walked around, aimlessly.

"Did you eat dinner yet?" Ethan asked me, grabbing the leash from EJ.

"No, but I'll just grab something from a food truck."

Ethan led us to the line of food trucks. We walked down once, viewing all their offerings. Once we figured out what we wanted, we split up.  Justine, EJ and I went to Coolhaus for ice cream and Ethan went to a taco truck.  EJ got a smores ice cream sandwich, I got myself a soda float and with EJ suggestion, we got Ethan an Affogato. Once we got our food and drinks, we found a little table to sit down and eat. After he devoured his ice cream, EJ ran to play at the children area.

"How's your drink?" I asked Ethan with a grin. He took a sip and thanked EJ earlier for picking it out for him, but hadn't drank anymore

"Terrible." He grimaced at the ice cream floating in the coffee. "What made you think I would like this?"  

"EJ said you liked coffee." I said, innocently.

"With half and half, not a scoop of coffee ice cream." He said, dryly. 

"I told EJ that might be over kill, but he said you really like coffee." I giggled before taking a bite of my taco. We ate in companionable silence as we watched EJ play in the splash pad with a few other kids.

"This park is pretty cool." I said.

"This entire area used to be a concrete hole over the freeway. The engineering and construction was very cool." Ethan explained.

"I was talking more about the playground and food trucks, but that too." I smiled, pulling off a piece of my tempura shrimp taco to share with him. "What made you interested in studying architecture?"

"My grandfather. He worked his way up to a construction manager and wanted to open his own construction or general contracting business. He used to compliment my drawings, and lego buildings. He would say how I would come work for him once he had his business started. Watching him is what made me interested, even though he never got his business up and running." He explained, holding his brisket street taco out for me to take a bite.

"Were you really close to your grandfather?" I said, after chewing.

"Very. My mom and dad both worked, so I spent a lot of time with him, especially during the summer. We were close until he passed away during my second year of college." Ethan answered.

"I'm sorry for your loss. Is he the reason you want your own business?"

"Partially. Mainly so I could hire minority and small businesses like the one he wanted to open."

"Oh.... Ok. Can't you do that as a partner?" I questioned.

"There are 4 other people who get a say in the decisions that I make."

"And you want to be the head honcho?"

"Yes. That's actually what I want my title to be." He dead panned as I grinned.

I remembered him telling me it was too risky to start his own company with EJ. I wondered if he wanted more kids in the future. I opened my mouth to ask, but stopped myself, rethinking how that question could come off. We hadn't officially been together for a week: was it too soon to be asking about kids?

"What's on your mind?" He asked me.

"I was just-rethinking my question." I admitted.

"You don't have to do that with me. Ask." He urged me.

"You mentioned before you didn't want to start your business until EJ was older. Hypothetically speaking, do you want more kids in the future?" I spoke frankly.

"Yes and no." He smiled at me when I pursed my lips. "Hypothetically speaking, if I were to get married in the next 5 years, more kids would definitely be an option." He answered.

"Why not after 5 years?"

"EJ would be 15, 16- preparing to go to college. I wouldn't want to start all over again."

"I understand." I nodded, thinking about where I hoped to be in the next 5 years and if I would be ready to start a family. I could definitely see it: Basketball games, park outings, another kid or two...

"Ok, let me have your drink." I asked, changing the subject and my train of thought. I tried a slip... Then another.

"Ohmygosh, I'm never drinking coffee without ice cream again!" I declared as I sucked it down.

After we finished, we called EJ before walking over to the dog park. We let Justine off the leash before we found a spot on an empty bench inside the gated area to watch her. She chased around other dogs up a hill and through jumping waters.

"I can't believe she went in the water." I shook my head as I got in the back seat with her. I didn't want to subject EJ to her jumping her wet body on him as we rode to my house. "She's going to give me a hard time tonight when I give her a bath."

"I can help you." Ethan offered, looking at me in his rear view mirror.

"No." I shook my head. "I got it. Thanks for inviting us."

"Yeah, thanks dad." EJ said.

When we got back to my place, I gave EJ a brief hug before Ethan walked me and Justine to the door.

"What do you have planned this weekend?" I asked him as we approached my door.

"EJ's game on Saturday. Not sure about Sunday; We normally go fishing with my dad, but since Brandon's going to have Ace, we'll probably watch the final game at his place." He informed me.

"Brandon's going to have Ace? At his place?" I asked, eyes wide.

"Apparently." Ethan confirmed.

"Ok." I nodded, before asking, "So we can hang out Saturday night?"

"Yes. I'll plan something after the game." He offered.

"No. You're always planning stuff. I appreciate it, but let me plan our next date."

"Ok." He said before we hugged goodbye. I tilted my head to receive a kiss, but he just looked at my lips, regrettably.

"EJ." He said, glancing at his truck, and stepping back.

"Oh... You don't want him to know about us?" I asked, confused.

"Not until I tell him." Ethan said, hesitantly.

I nodded understandably, even though I didn't really understand. We just all hung out together, when did we tell him? Justine strained on the leash, and I knew this wasn't a good time to get into it. "Ok. I'll see you Saturday."

I went inside and wrestled Justine into the bath before taking a shower myself. The next morning, I decided to treat Ethan with a homemade meal and a massage for our date. I figured it would be the perfect date to cater to him, get him full and relaxed and talk to him about telling EJ about us. I was obsessing over what to cook him when Amber called me.

"Hey, what's up?" I answered brightly.

"I don't know. You tell me. Are you dating Ethan?"

"Who told you that?" I asked, caught off by her accusing tone.

"Will. Ethan told him y'all were together and he just told me. I told him there was no way!" She said.

I grinned at how Ethan followed through with telling Will about us, then frowned at Amber's words. "There is a way. We are dating."

"Why?" She bemoaned.

"Why?" I asked, confused by her question and tone.

"Yes why? Why would you want to date him? Why would you put yourself though that again?"

"Technically, it's the first time and I want to date him because I like him." I responded.

"I don't understand Lily-"

"You don't have to. I need a recipe off my phone. I have to go." I said, before saying goodbye.

I didn't think I could make Amber understand even if I tried. I barely understood it myself. I just knew that his texts and calls filled me with joy. His smile lite up the darkest parts of me. Being in his arms made me feel safe and desired. I was trying to enjoy the feeling, not explain or defend it to others.

After another 30 minutes, I decided to keep dinner simple with pasta, salad, stuffed mushrooms and garlic bread. As I put the grocery list together, I called Jenna for the recipe for her Bolognese sauce.

"Of course Lily. I'll text it to you right now." She agreed.

"Text her what?" I heard my brother in the background.

"None of your business!" Jenna replied, smartly.

"I'm mad at her. Don't tell her anything."

They bickered playfully for a while before I asked Jenna to put me on speaker phone.

"You mad bro?" 

"Yeah. Thanks for making me look bad with your father's day gift." Cam said, sarcastically.

I sent my dad a framed collage of pictures of our family. In the center was a picture of me, my brother, Jenna and Beatrice surrounding my dad in a picture in front of my bar. Inscribed in the wood frame was the quote:

The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams and aspirations he sets not only for himself, but for his family.

"It's not a contest!" Jenna exclaimed to him. 

"Yeah. I'm sure dad will love yet another bottle of fancy cognac." I taunted.

My dad had a special made wet bar that he keep stock with fancy expensive alcohol that he only opened for guest that he liked or was trying to impress. Once he was in the Airforce, my brother always gifted him with something for his collection. It's something they shared so I never gifted him with alcohol, even though it was an safe, easy gift.

"I told you she was trying to outdo me." Cam declared.

"I really wasn't." I laughed. "If it makes you feel better, I really got it made for me. When I saw father's day shit at the store, I made another one for him."

"That does make me feel better. I'll feel even better when I tell him the truth." Cam revealed.

"You better not punk! I told you that in confidence!" I exclaimed.

"Sure you did. What were you calling my wife for?" He asked.

"A recipe, nosy ass." I answered.

"Which one, big mouth?"

"Bolognese sauce. Now give Jenna back her phone so she can text it to me." I demanded.

"Bolognese sauce? You trying to impress someone?" Cam pressed.

"No!" I exclaimed. "Why do I have to be impressing someone? Maybe I just have a taste for it?" I backed up.

"Because I know you. You're impatient: if you had a taste for it, you would have brought it or gone out to eat. So who are you cooking it for?" Cam interrogated me.

I took a deep breath, equal parts of wanting to get this over with and curious about his reaction. "Ethan. We're dating." I said simply.

There was a moment of silence before Cam exhaled sharply. "Fuck."

My heart sank, disappointingly until I heard Jenna cheer loudly with a laugh.

"I told you!!! You're coming with me to Denise's birthday weekend." She squealed excitedly.

"Not the whole weekend. They're all pretentious assholes. Can't we just do dinner and leave?" He pleaded with her.

"Nope. The bet was one weekend of whatever the winner wants. That's what I want, loser!"

"What bet?" I tried to interrupt.

"She told me she wasn't dating her friends. Told dad that too. I'm a loser for believing her lies?" Cam argued.

"You're a loser for not listening to me. I study human behavior, I told you there was something between them, But nooooo.... You didn't want to listen. You thought you knew better than me which makes you a loser." Jenna reamed him as they continued to go back in forth.

"I didn't. I just trusted my lying sister."

"Alright. The liar is getting off the phone. Bye!" I exclaimed.

Jenna laughed. "I told Cam that you seemed more interested in Ethan than Uriel but he didn't believe me. We made a bet and he lost and now he's mad."

"Thanks to you." Cam added, bitterly.

"No, thanks to you betting on my love live. Who does that?" I scoffed.

"I will never do it again. Believe me." Cam promised.

"Besides you losing the bet, what do you think about Ethan and me?" I asked, cautiously.

"I think, if you're happy, I'm happy." Cam stated.

"Really?"

"Really."

"Even with y'alls past and everything?"

"We squashed that when you first moved back to Texas."

"What happened?" I asked, curious. Neither one of them let on that they had a conversation back then.

"We talked." He answered vaguely. "I'm serious Lily. I want you to be happy. If he makes you happy, that's good enough for me."

"He does." I smiled warmly. "And have fun at your pretentious asshole weekend. You should fit right in." I laughed at him. Jenna joined in and Cam groaned loudly.

Saturday morning, after Justine and I ate and went for a run, I started to cook for dinner with Ethan. I figured I should have the sauce and mushrooms done so when I got to his house after the game, all I would need to do was cook the pasta, put the salad together, and heat everything up.

I finished all my prep for cooking before I packed a bag and the food in my car and headed to Ethan's house. I planned for us to meet at his place so after the game we could head back and have dinner together. As soon as I had everything put away in the kitchen with Ethan's help, I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him the way I wanted to on Wednesday night. He wrapped his arms around my waist, drawing me closer as he kissed me back.

"We should get going." Ethan murmured between kisses.

"Ok." I breathed, still capturing his lips on mine, kissing him deeper.

"Lily-" he groaned, returning my kisses before I finally pulled away.

"Ok. Let's go." I smiled at his face, flushed with desire.

We arrived at the gym and sat beside Megan who was was sitting by Jayden's and Alex's parents. Alex's mom Tatiana was asking Megan if she wanted to order team attire for herself and Ethan, but she declined.

"Can I order that sweatshirt?" I asked, nodding to her Penguin hoodie.

She nodded and turned around, flipping her hair to show off the back. Her last name was stamped across the back. "$17.50."

"What size do you want?" I asked Ethan.

"I don't need one."

"I didn't ask that. Give me a size or I'll pick one." I said flippantly.

He turned away from the court to study me for a moment. "Extra large." He reluctantly said.

"Extra large and a medium hoodie. And 3 t-shirts." I ordered. "2 medium. Same size Ethan?" I asked.

When Ethan gave me a questioning look, I shrugged. "Just in case you think it's too hot for a sweatshirt."

"3?"

"Justine." I said matter of factly.

"Large." Ethan said.

"You should get the hat too... Just in case." Tatiana grinned at me, jokingly.

"Right. Add it." I smiled. "3."

Ethan said nothing, but shook his head, defeated. I bumped my leg against his and smiled. He smiled back before focusing on the game. It was tied until the last 20 seconds of the game. The coach's son forced a wild jumpshot that was rebounded by the other team. They made a fast break and EJ got called on a foul that caused them to make a game winning free throw. After the game, the coach briefly lectured on with better decisions, they could have won this game. His ball hog son glared at EJ. When I saw how visible upset EJ was,  I crossed my arms, livid.

Ethan placed his hand on the small of my back, reassuringly and I fixed my face. EJ joined us after the team meeting and Ethan gave him a fist pound, saying he played a great game. I seconded him, running down his stats and saying "balling!" He didn't look convinced, but at least he smiled. Megan handed out invitations to EJ birthday party at Great Wolf Lodge to his teammates as they grabbed their after the game snacks.

When we got back to Ethan house, I headed into the kitchen and started to get dinner ready. Ethan followed me into the kitchen, asking if he could do anything to help.

"No. I want you to relax. This is your date slash father's day gift until your penguin hoodie comes." I grinned.

"I told you I didn't want one." He said as he washed and dried his hands.

"But you're getting it. And a shirt. And a hat." I said as I placed the mushrooms in the oven.

"You let that woman hustle you. Besides, EJ might not even be a penguin after this season." Ethan replied.

"Why do you say that? You think EJ won't want to play anymore?" I said, adding a pinch of salt to the boiling water.

"If he does, I might find a different club. EJ needs a coach that's going to teach him the fundamentals." He mentioned.

"Thank you! Smart decisions my ass. He should have been lecturing his son about setting up a good play and not taking selfish, wild ass jumpshots!" I exclaimed, pissed all over again.

"That's the one thing I hate about club sports: they let parent's coach their kids. It never works." Ethan explained.

"Right. My dad coached my brother's peewee team for a season and he was the hardest on Cam." I shook my head at their blowouts that led to Cam quiting all sports. I couldn't imagine Ethan being that tough or giving blind favoritism to EJ. "You could do it though. I think you would be a smart, fair coach." I said, adding the pasta to the water and giving it a stir.

"Maybe, but I don't have the time to commit to a team. I'm going to talk to him about his smart decision comment at his next practice. EJ doesn't need to feel like he did anything wrong." Ethan said. 

"Right." I agreed, looking over my shoulder to see him tearing up the lettuce he already washed. "I told you I didn't want help."

"But you're getting it." He repeated back to me.

"Fine. I'll let you do the salad, but after that, you relax."

Ethan completed the salad while I finished up the mushrooms and pasta. I put the garlic bread in the oven as we set the table together. We worked great together and was eating in no time.

"Dinner was delicious. Thank you." Ethan said as he gathered our plates.

"My pleasure." I said as I followed him into the kitchen with our wine glasses. He sent me to the living room with instructions to find something to watch as he loaded the dishwasher. I didn't argue with him as it gave me the perfect opportunity to set up the next part of our date. 

I went to the bathroom, freshen up and changed into comfortable lace shorts and a matching tank. When I returned back to the living room, I grabbed my bag to set up the room. I flipped through jazz music stations and found one playing a George Michael cover and I stopped. The station was jazz covers of top 40 songs: It was perfect blend for the two of us.

When Ethan joined me, his eyes took me in before he examined the blanket laid over the couch, a few candles lit around the room, and the aromatherapy diffuser on his coffee table scenting the room in lavender.

"What's this?" He asked as his eyes racked over me again.

"Part 2 of our date. Take off your shirt and lay down on the couch."

He did what I asked, taking off his t-shirt and revealing his solid, lean frame. I've seen him shirtless before, but this was the one time I let my eyes take him in, unabashedly. His arms and chest were muscular without bulging, his abs defined, stomach flat, skin brown and flawless. He was just amazing- inside and out.

My perusal of his shirtless torso ended as he laid down on the couch like I instructed. I kneeled on the floor next to him, warming my hands by rubbing them together before lightly running my fingertips over his back and neck. He was a little tense, but as I stroked him in a circular motions with my palms, he loosened up. After he was completely relaxed, I got up and straddled his hips. He stiffened immediately, but I worked his back and neck, deeply massaging his muscles until most of the tension left.

"You're very good at this." He complimented me, turning his head to the side.

"You sound surprised. I did go to school for this. Massage therapy is part of physical therapy. It's different from relaxation, but it's good to know both." I said, finding the triangular bone at the base of his spine. "Stimulating certain muscles and nerves can make you feel relaxed, tranquility, even euphoria." I applied pressure to that spot, kneading into his back before tracing up his spine. 

"That sounds about right." He moaned, his eyes shutting as he took a deep breath. I kept it up, massaging his back, focusing on a few more pressure points. When I finished, he thanked me profusely.

"Have you had a professional massage before?" I asked as got up to blow out the candles.

"Once. Nowhere near as good as you." He said, sincerely as he sat up.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it" I said, walking back to the table to turn of the diffuser. He grabbed my hand and pulled me onto the couch next to him. I stared into his eyes, which were even darker with desire as he threaded his fingers through my hair. I closed my eyes as he pressed his lips against mine. He slipped his tongue in my mouth, his kiss demanding complete and total control. I gave in, pressing against him, loving the feel of his skin against mine, desperate to feel more.

He pulled back to catch his breath and I shrugged out of my tank top. I wasn't wearing a bra so I was completely  topless. His hands immediately went to my breasts, caressing me as he watched intently. He fondled each handful, flicking his finger over my nipples. When they harden against his careful touch, arousal flowed through my body, making me ache. I straddled him before my lips found his again for another kiss. When I felt his erection grow against me, I grinded my hips against him.

We continued making out passionately, exploring each other's body. I love that we were on the same page of not taking it any futher than that. My hands were at his waistline after exploring his hard length over his pants. When the thoughts of pulling him out and impaling myself on him kept creeping in my head, I knew it was time to stop.

"I need to get going." I sighed as I pulled away.

"You don't have to. Stay." He said, gripping my ass firmer to bring me back.

"Yes I do. I'm contemplating if you'll fall for the just stick the tip in line." I confessed.

His lips spread in a devastatingly beautiful smile that made me clench between my legs. "I won't, but you can still spend the night. I'll even put a chastity blanket between us."

I chuckled. "A blanket wouldn't stop me."

"Then I'll sleep in the spare bedroom. It has a lock." He offered, planting a soft kiss on my lips.

"I may try to pick it, but ok."

We ended up sleeping comfortably in his bed together. He did place the duvet between us, but we must have breached it because in the middle of the night I found myself in his arms, nuzzling against his chest. The next morning, I woke up well rested and extremely comfortable. I would have stayed in bed if Ethan wasn't missing. I couldn't find my tank, so I put on his t-shirt and left the room to find him.

He was in the kitchen, getting eggs from the refrigerator.

"Good morning. How do you like your eggs?" He greeted me.

"It depends." I replied, joining him in the kitchen.

"On?"

"What's with it." I started. "If it's just eggs, than an omelette. With bacon, then I like them fried. Toast, scrambled softly."

He leaned in and I met him halfway for a deep, soulful kiss. "How bout with toast and sausage?" He smirked at me.

"Over easy." I smiled at him. "I feel like I should be making you breakfast considering it's Father's Day." I said when we pulled apart.

"You cooked for me and gave me a massage last night. The least I can do is make you breakfast." He countered.

"Fine." I said, pulling out his father's day card. "Happy father's day." I said, handing it over.

"Thank you." He said, taking it from me and looking at it, thoughtfully.

"What? There's no money in it." I said, truthfully. There was a gift card for Top Golf.

"Nothing...I still have your card from last year." He admitted, eyes still on the card.

"Yeah?" I asked, waiting on him to continue. He looked up, but instead of looking at me, he looked towards the front room. We both heard the footsteps and Ethan took a step away from me. I turned around in time to see EJ walking in excitedly, carrying a bakery box. Megan trailed behind him. I quickly tucked in Ethan's shirt so my shorts were visible.

"Happy Father's day dad." EJ announced holding out the box to Ethan. "It's cinnamon scones from the Sweet Spot. Mom and I got up early to make sure we got one for you." EJ explained as Megan stared at both of us. A mixture of confusion and disbelief was on her face. Something else flashed in her eyes as she turned to stare at Ethan.

"Thank you son." Ethan said, reaching to take the box from him and giving him a hug. "Thank you Megan."

Megan nodded but I could tell they were having a nonverbal conversation as EJ called out the elephant in the room.

"What are you doing here Lily?Do you want half of my scone?" EJ asked me.

"No thank you. I was just dropping off a father's day gift too." I told him with a smile. "Your dad hasn't opened it yet, but it's something for you too."

"Cool. I still get a birthday gift right?" EJ asked.

"Of course. At your birthday party. How old are you turning again? 6?" I teased.

"9!" He corrected me, loudly.

"Oh... That's right. 9. I'll see you at your 9th birthday party then." I said, giving him a hug goodbye. I gave Ethan a little wave before I retrieved my bag, shoes and tank top that was on the couch before I left. I was pulling into my garage when I received a text from Ethan.

Ethan: I'm sorry our breakfast got interrupted.

Me: It's ok. Enjoy your day. Call me when you get a chance.

It definitely wasn't ok. I had so many questions: had he told Megan about us? Why would she be upset we were dating? Did she have a key to his house and just randomly show up whenever? When was he going to tell EJ about us? All those thoughts swirled in my head until I forced them aside to call my dad.

I wished him a happy father's day. He thanked me for the collage and asked me what was new. I told him nothing much which he responded by saying that wasn't what he heard. He revealed that Cam had told him to put me down for a plus one at his wedding.

"Don't Dad."

"You don't think you two will be together in a couple months?"

"I do but he has a lot going on in his life with his family and he would have to plan for a trip now and we just started dating." I explained.

"So it's not Uriel?" He said, sounding relieved.

"You didn't like Uriel?"

"I didn't say that." My dad stated.

"I know and it's not Uriel. I decided not to see him anymore so you can tell the truth." I said.

"I think he was too mature for you. Very set in his ways. He would have tried to browbeat you into what he wanted and it would have never worked."

"Ain't that the fucking truth." I snorted. My dad would know. He tried it too.

"Language..." My dad said, warningly.

"Sorry. But you're right. It was a bad match."

"Tell me about the new guy."

"He's not new. I mean, I've known him for awhile, but we just started dating. You've met him. It's my friend Ethan." I told him.

"Hmm... The one with the child? Never been married?" My dad asked for clarification.

"That's him." I answered. "He's a great dad and he was engaged to the mother of his son, but it didn't work out. He doesn't try to pressure me into anything, but he motivates and encourages me. He really is an amazing person." I pleaded his case to my dad.

"I'm sure he is if you're dating him. You should invite him to the wedding. If he can't make it, we'll plan another time to get together. I would like to meet him again." He said, simply.

"Maybe. I'll let you know." I promised. We got off the phone shortly after and I sighed in relief. My dad didn't say anything negative and was eager about re-meeting Ethan- that was a good sign. I took my small victory as my door bell rang. I went to answer it and saw Rocky standing at my door, pacing. I quickly let her in.

"I let Brandon take Ace. I'm freaking out a little." She exclaimed.

"There's nothing to freak out about. Brandon is more than prepared and he's 20 minutes away." I reassured her.

"My rationale side knows that- it's being overwhelmed by my momma side that's screaming go over there and get Ace back." Rocky admitted.

"He won't need you. Besides, Ethan and his dad will be there. Between the 3 of them, Ace will be fine."

"How do you know they're going over there?"

"Ethan told me." I told her, a grin spreading across my face. "As Ethan's girlfriend, I can totally spy on Brandon for you. " I joked, confiding in her about Ethan and me.

"Please tell me you're joking." Rocky stated.

"Of course. I'm not going to spy on him. Brandon is more than capable: that's completely unnecessary."

"No. You and Ethan dating. What's the punchline?"

"Punchline?" I asked, puzzled.

"You're joking right? There's no way you can possibly think dating Ethan is a good idea." Rocky began.

"I felt the same way when he asked me out, but we're dating. Taking things slow, but it's good between us. And easy. I like spending time with him and he feels the same way so we're together." I explained.

"What happens if you don't work out?" Rocky questioned me.

"We've been through worse than a break up. We'll be ok."

"You say that, but it might not be. Do you remember how awkward it was with Brandon and me in the middle of you two?"

"We've been dating for almost a month and neither one of you knew. Believe me, you're not going to be in the middle of us. I'm not letting anyone do that." I said, pointedly for her to drop it. Rocky made a face, but didn't comment. "Speaking of being in the middle, have you talked to Forrest?"

"And said what?" She huffed.

"How are you? How have you been? Are you in Shreveport as lost as I am without you-"

"He's in Shreveport?" She asked, shocked.

"Yeah... You didn't know?"

"I haven't talked to him recently."

"He left Monday. Have you been on Facebook or Instagram-"

"Like I have time for all!" She snapped. She definitely had time. We comment on each other's stuff all the time. He had to have blocked her.

"Rocky-" I said, sympathetically.

"I don't want to talk about him."

"Ok. Let's get ready for the day party-"

She stood up. "I don't want to go to a stupid party. I'll talk to you later."

"Rocky-" I called after her as she stormed out. I let her leave.

I got up, changed to my fitted distressed white jeans, a white crop top and one of my dad's baseball jersey. I took a picture of myself and edited it side by side with another picture of my dad wearing a similar jersey and holding me when I was about 5 or 6. I posted it on my page with the caption: Stuntin' like my daddy. #Throwback #Ortiz #HappyFather'sDay.

I shouted out all the dad's on my page tagging them in a happy Father's Day message before heading out to meet the girls at the party.