Life is a Highway

Life is a Highway- Tom Cochrane/Rascal Flatts

***Flashback of EJ's 5th birthday party***

June 2012

I spent 40 minutes looking in my mirror, trying to fix my hair and makeup. For me, that was 2 times as long as it normally took me. I wanted to look nice, but not like I was trying too hard. Megan was going to be at the party of course and I didn't want to look frumpy compared to her. EJ's grandparents were going to be there as well and it was going to be my first time actually meeting them. It will also be the first time seeing Ethan after he confessed his feelings for me...

That thought made me put my make up away. I didn't want to encourage him. This was EJ's day: One of the last chances I have to hang out with him before I moved to California. I put my straightened hair back with a checkered headband and got dressed in black capris and a white fitted tee.

When I get to Ethan's house, I was 30 minutes early. I applied a cherry red lip gloss before I made my way to the house. I saw Brandon's car, so I knew I had at least one ally. He was still trying to get Rocky to go out with him, so he had to be nice to me. EJ's grandmother opened the door. She is a few inches shorter than me, with few extra pounds on her frame, but she carries the extra weight well.

"Hi Mrs. Carter. I'm Lily. I don't know if you remember me-"

"Of course Lily! Even if I didn't, the way EJ talks about you, there's no way I wouldn't know who you are. Come on in!" She smiled, friendly at me.

I stepped into the house. The living room is filled with black and white racing decorations, Lightning McQueen posters, and Cars themed balloons.

"My best friend Lily!" EJ exclaimed, running from the couch to me. His smile warms and breaks my heart at the same time. 

How am I going to say goodbye to him?

"My best friend EJ! Happy birthday little man!" I said, pushing those thoughts away. I gave him a huge hug. He latched on to my neck, so I was forced to pick him up. I didn't mind, I held him tightly in my arms.

"You're 5 years old now- Getting too old to be picked up." Megan said to EJ, giving me a tight smile.

"Oh, it's his birthday. He should get whatever he wants." Mrs. Carter declared.

"I want to play outside." EJ complained.

"Let's go see if your daddy is done out there. The grill should be cooled down by now." Mrs. Carter said. I followed her out, carrying EJ.

Outside, there was a Cars jump house and orange cones with red balloons scattered throughout the backyard. There was a happy birthday banner and racing flags covering the fence. A battery operated Chevrolet Camaro ride-along car sat by the door with a red bow on it. Now I saw why EJ was so anxious to come outside. It was a 5 year old dream.

"Hmph, great timing Lily. Get here when all the work is done." Brandon grinned at me from a patio chair.

I smiled. "Looks like you didn't need my help. It looks great out here." I said, putting EJ down. Mrs. Carter took him around the backyard to look at all the decorations.

Ethan nodded at me. He was securing the pegs on the bounce house. I waved back.

Okay. We can get through this.

"Coulda used your help with the food. Or at least setting it up so no one gets food poisoning. " Brandon complained.

I scoffed. "Whatever. I'm officially a doctor now. I don't need to know how to cook." I said, playfully.

"You Baylor girls like to throw your accomplishments around. Congratulations by the way."

I laughed. "Thanks. How is it going with Rocky? Can I congratulate you?" Out the corner of my eye I saw Ethan approach us. I watched him touch the grill.

"Still working on it, but soon." Brandon said, with a cocky grin.

"Good luck with that. You're gonna need it." I warned him.

"Stranger things have happened..." Brandon looked at me and Ethan, knowingly.

I blushed.

"Help me move the grill to the garage." Ethan told Brandon, ignoring his comment.

"Lily! You're flushed. C'mon inside and get a drink before you dehydrate!" Mrs. Carter commanded, leading me to the kitchen.

Once the party got started, there were no more awkward moments with Ethan. Mostly because Brandon was on his best behavior and I spent most of my time with EJ and the other kids. They had a blast, jumping in the bounce house and taking turns driving EJ's new car.

Everyone gathered inside to sing happy birthday and cut the cake. After that, EJ opened his presents. Nothing compared to the race car he already got from his parents, but he still got excited over every new toy. I got him a V-Tech digital camera. As his friends began to leave, I could tell EJ was starting to tire out. He sat beside his mom on the couch, leaning against her, fighting to keep his eyes open.

"Come on babe. Let's get ready for bed." Megan told him.

"Can I have a minute with him before you do that?" I asked her. It was now or never: I had to say goodbye. Megan nodded and went to the kitchen. I sat down next to him.

"EJ, you know why I bought you a camera?" When he shook his head, I continued. "I'm moving away. I won't be able to see you all the time, so I need you to take a ton of pictures so I can see how you're doing."

"Where are you going? Are you coming back?" He asked, looking up at me.

"I'm moving to California for my job. You have to ride an airplane to get there. I will come visit you, just not as much as I want to."

"Do you have to go? Who's going to watch me?" He whined. Tears welled up in my eyes.

"Uncle Brandon will. He already said he'll show you how to send me pictures on the computer. And I'll send you any cool toys I find in California, okay?" I promised him.

He nodded. "Ok."

"Alright. Goodnight best friend EJ. I love you."

"Love you, best friend Lily." He said with a yawn.

I hugged him, picking him up. I gave him a kiss on the cheek before I turned my head, looking for Megan.

"I got him." I looked up to see Ethan. He gave me a small, knowing smile, letting me know he heard our conversation. I handed EJ over, hiding my face. I couldn't take how he was looking at me. I don't want him to see the tears in my eyes. When Ethan took him to his room, I hurried to the hallway bathroom, but someone was in it. I decided to just leave and get far enough away to cry in my car, when Mrs. Carter stopped me.

"Use the bathroom in the bedroom." She said to me, softly.

I nodded. I knew it was Ethan's room. As awkward as it was to be in there, I was sure being a blubbering mess at a kid's birthday party was worst. I went into his room and into his private bath. I let the tears fall silently. I quickly splash cold water on my face, ruining the little make-up I had on. 5 minutes later, I got myself together enough to say goodbye to everyone.

When I stepped out of the bathroom, Ethan was standing in the bedroom.

"Your mom sent me in here." I blurted out.

 Great, blame his mom.

"She told me." He said. I nodded and tried to get past him to leave the room, but he stopped me, calling my name.

"Lily-" he grabbed my hand.

"Ethan-" 

The next thing I knew, we were kissing. I didn't even know who kissed who. The only thing I knew was that it had been so long and he felt so right. There were so many reason why it was wrong:  The birthday party. His mom. EJ. Megan. All valid reasons to why we shouldn't be doing this here or right now. 

"Ethan. We can't." I said, breathlessly, moving my lips away. He just kissed my face instead. "I'm still moving. Nothing has changed." I gave him the reason why we shouldn't be doing this at all. His lips on mine and his arms holding me close almost made me forget I was moving back to California. Almost.

He stilled, and I thought I got to him. Then, he continued, rubbing his hands over my ass and crushing his lips into mine again. "I know." He breathed against my lips. "We didn't know last time was the last time. Just one more time. For fun."

I stiffened at his last word, but he kissed my neck. He knew that was my spot. Sparks ignited all over my body as he kissed me there and I clenched between my legs and moaned. He took that as my consent, because he led me to the bed. Instead of laying me on it, he leaned me against it, so I propped myself on my hands at the end of the raised bed.

I gave him a questioning look over my shoulder.

"Sorry. It's my mom's room tonight." He explained.

I was nervous as he tugged down my capris and panties, but my wants overshadowed my nerves.

"Arch your back for me baby." He said, huskily.

I did and he groaned as he grabbed my hips. After a moment, I felt him rubbing against me before he pushed himself deep inside of me. We both moaned when he was all the way in. He rocked into me slowly, his hand sliding around my waist to reach between my thighs. He found and rubbed my clitoris in lazy circles. I bit my lip to stifle my groans and pushed back into him, wanting, needing him to give me more. He didn't. He kept up the excruciatingly slow pace, edging me closer and closer to orgasm, just to stop, pull me up close to kiss me, before he started all over again. I was close to tears of frustration as he kissed, touched and grinded into me just the way I loved, only to stop and drive me crazy. It felt like forever until he finally brought me over the edge, erupting inside of me at the same time.

Afterwards, he drew me close and held me against him. He kissed my shoulder, again and again, just like he did in the kitchen on the day we decided to be friends with benefits.

"I'll explain it to him. You don't have to keep in touch. I promise, he won't feel like you left him. He'll get used to you not being around anymore." He said, letting me go. "Have a safe trip. Good luck with everything." He backed away from me. Without another word, he left the room.

I spent several minutes trying to comprehend what happened, then what he said hit me. Hard. I got dressed and left the room. I couldn't stand saying goodbye to anyone else. So I left, letting the tears fall freely as I raced to my car and drove away.