False Alarm

"Diamonds and the rings are her fantasy

She chase hearts with the Hennessy

You love her, but you'll never be

Enough, enough

She loves everybody

Can't you tell by the signs?

She loves everybody

She gets off all the time

It's a dark philosophy

And it haunts her constantly

She's a false alarm to me

She's a false alarm
False Alarm (Hey Hey Hey Hey!)." False Alarm by The Weeknd

Ethan trailed me to the hospital in Lewisville. His presence behind me was the only reason I didn't break every traffic violation on the way. Lewisville was not where her doctor practiced from, so I automatically assumed the worst. It was a couple weeks before her due date, but still, anything could happen... I calmed down, banishing those thoughts from my mind. I told myself everything was fine and Rocky was going to deliver a healthy baby.

We parked in the parking garage before we hurried to the labor and delivery department. I pulled out my phone to call Brandon as Ethan headed to the nurse's station. Brandon didn't answer so I was calling again when Ethan waved at me.

"She's in room 312." Ethan said.

The nurse advised us to let the doctor finish the examination before we went in. I paced nervously by the door. Ethan was on the phone with his mom when the doctor came out. Ethan told his mom he would call her back as I went into the room.

"Rocky!" I said, immediately picking up on the tension in the room as I rushed to her side. Forrest was sitting in the chair next to her and gave me a nod. Brandon didn't even look up; he just stared at the monitor. Rocky looked drained, and I felt absolute dread. "What's wrong? Is everything ok?"

"Everything's fine. I'm not in labor. Just a few contractions. I tried to tell him." Rocky assured me, sending Forrest a look.

"Rather safe than sorry." Forrest said, giving her a small smile.

Brandon crossed his arms, rigidly.

What the fuck? Was he mad Forrest brought her? I would have too!

Ethan finally joined us in the room and Rocky explained it was a false alarm. Ethan must have picked up on the same vibes I was feeling because he asked Brandon to step out so he could call their parents. Brandon did, not saying a word, but glaring at Forrest as he left. If looks could kill, Forrest would be dead.

"Ok...what was that?" I declared as soon as the door closed.

Forrest shook his head before Rocky sent me a pleading look. "Not now. I just want to relax so I can go home."

"Ok." I said, taking a seat in another chair.

Rocky looked over my outfit and make-up as I checked out the monitor.

"Where were you at all dressed up?" Rocky asked me.

I blushed, thinking about what transpired at the bar with Ethan...

"Q's last day happy hour." I said simply.

Rocky's phone went off and she sighed. "My mama. I wish he didn't text her."

I took Rocky's phone and sent texts letting everyone know it was a false alarm. Ethan and a more calm Brandon returned while I was talking on the phone with Mama Smith. She was going off and asking if she needed to drive out to help Rocky take it easy. When I relayed that to Rocky, she immediately shook her head no. When I told Mama Smith we had it covered, she demanded I put her on speaker phone.

"You need to be on bed rest! I don't care what no doctor says, that baby needs 40 weeks. You came a month early and you've been running me ragged every since. You want that?" She ranted.

"No Ma'am." Rocky said, keeping the annoyance out her voice but I could see it on her face.

"You're damn right you don't. What did you do today?" She interrogated her.

"Nothing." Rocky said flustered.

Brandon's calm left the window and he killed Forrest a second time with a glare. Forrest looked unbothered as he took Rocky's hand in his. I looked over at Ethan; his face was completely neutral, but I knew he either knew or at least suspected what was going on.

"Nothing my ass. You betta stop messing around and rest, you hear me-" Mama Smith continued. When I could tell Rocky was losing patience, I cut her off.

"That's the doctor Mama Smith. I'll call you back when she's released." I lied.

"You tell that doctor-"

I hung up before she could finish. "Jesus. She must have been born 3 months early." I muttered.

Ethan smirked, but other than that, no response from anyone else.

After another hour, Rocky was cleared to go home. Rocky asked Forrest to meet her at the house, but opted to have Brandon drive her home. Forrest clearly wasn't happy with her choice, but respected her decision. After saying bye to Ethan, I walked out with Forrest who parked at the ER entrance.

"What the hell happened?" I asked, thinking I already knew the answer.

"Rocky started having contractions so I brought her here." He started.

"Ok..." I trailed off, knowing that wasn't the full story.

Forrest sighed, heavily. "The doctor asked what she was doing before the contractions started. She just had an orgasm."

 If I wasn't so mortified, I would have laughed. "Ugh-" I started.

"Save it. What Rocky and I chose to do behind close doors is our business." He said, sharply.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean it like that. Well, a little because your like my brother and she's like my sister." I clarified. "I'm just putting myself in Brandon's shoes. He had to hear that?" I questioned.

"Should she have lied to the doctor?" Forrest asked, rhetorically.

"Couldn't she have said like yoga? Same thing right?"

"Yoga?"

"Yes... She's with child. All sexual activities should be like yoga anyway." I joked with a smile.

He cracked a smile too. "It is. We're saving the decathlon until after Ace is born-"

"Ohmygod, stop." I covered my ears and ran away.

Forrest laughed as he followed me.

I was glad Forrest was able to find the humor in the situation, but Rocky didn't. Saturday morning, I headed over to check on her and see if she needed me to do anything. After Forrest left, Rocky told me she tried to apologize to Brandon for worrying him on the ride home. He told her he didn't want to talk about it, but requested her to stay in Dallas close to her doctor instead of out in Lewisville where Forrest lived. She agreed, but was talking it to the extreme by not wanting to see Forrest at all until the baby was born.

"I get it. It's hard, but that's not really fair to Forrest." I argued.

I know but Brandon is-"

"Going to have to get used to you two being together if this is going to be long term." I finished for her.

When she got quiet, I looked at her. "Do you see a future with Forrest?" I asked her seriously.

"If I didn't I wouldn't be dating him." She answered right away before she sighed. "I don't know what that looks like with Ace and Brandon. I really need time to think about everything. Forrest is already planning to be here every night with me so I'm not alone." Rocky explained.

"I can be here instead. Have you thought of a nice way of telling Forrest to back off?" I thought out loud.

"No. That's the problem. Anyway I say it he's going to take it wrong. You think I can still get a bitch pass with pregnancy hormones?" She stated, sarcastically.

I frowned until I got a great idea. "Your mom has an all year bitch pass!" I exclaimed.

"Oh, so I'm going to turn into my mom?" Rocky sneered at me.

"No! Invite your mom out here like she wants. How can Forrest get upset at you wanting your mom around? Let her be the bitch while you relax!"

"One problem: I can't relax with her around. You heard her on the phone."

"I think that was her way of trying to bully you into asking her to come out." When Rocky gave me a crazy look, I quickly explained."Think about it. Her baby girl is having a baby. Her youngest child and only daughter, who is single and lives alone, is about to give birth. What mother wouldn't be concerned? And she's probably a little hurt you haven't wanted her with you. I bet she would chill if you invite her out here."

Rocky thought about it, still looking skeptical. "Maybe. I'll talk to her. See what she says before I invite her."

I spent the entire weekend with her, only leaving to go grocery shopping and to check on Justine. Forrest was over every night as promised. I did convince him to take Tuesday evening off to go to the playoff watch party with me. Amber, Will, their kids, Staci, her daughter Cherish, Gigi, Megan, EJ, and Jayden already planned to go to the watch party too. Ethan was supposed to come, but something came up at his job that required him to cancel.

A small part of me was relieved he wasn't coming. We hadn't talked since the night at the bar. I had no idea where that conversation was heading and the uncertainty terrified me. I was good with the way things were between us. Maybe I was misreading the signs, but I didn't want to misinterpret anything else between us. At Rocky's urging, I gave his ticket to Forrest.

After work on Tuesday, I changed into dark skinny jeans and a blue top for the game. I got an Uber from my job to the arena instead of driving and having to parking there. Forrest drove and he was going to take me to my car after the game. On the way to the watch party, I put my hair in a neat top knot and freshened my makeup. I already had texts from Monica and Amber by the time I arrived. The game already started and was being broadcast on the huge televisions above center court. I called Monica as I found my seat.

She invited me to the press box and I told her I would stop by sometime during the game. I found my section and Amber spotted me first, waving a foam hand at me. I made my way and took the empty seat between her and Forrest. I greeted everyone before settling in to watch the game.

Oklahoma pulled ahead early, but between the Mavs dancers, ManiAACs (male hip hop troupe), giveaways, and DJ, we still had so much fun. The kids had me laughing as I Snapchatted them dancing and cheering the Mavericks on. Our efforts came up short; by halftime Oklahoma just extended the lead and I knew Oklahoma was going to win and end the series.

Will and Megan agreed as they both decided to take their kids home. Cherish, Staci's daughter, was ready to go too so they left as well. Forrest wanted to leave, but I made him stay, reminding him he was my ride and I wasn't ready to go until the end of the game. After I called Monica; Amber, Gigi, Forrest and I made our way to the press box.

The mood in the press box was a lot more somber than the arena seats. There was plenty of food and booze to drown sorrows in, but majority of the group was still watching the game, hoping somehow the Mavericks would pull it out. Uriel was one of the hopeful; he had has arms crossed, watching every second of the game. He spared me a passing glance before turning his attention back to the game. After I introduced my friends to Monica, Trent and a few others I knew from volunteering and hanging with them, we sat down and chatted.

"It looks like you were having more fun down there." Monica stated, after we posted a video to my SnapStory.

"I was. The ManiAACs were lit. There was one guy, with a beard and a bandana-" I started.

"Big Rob." Monica supplied.

"He killed it!" Gigi agreed.

"Yeah, he's hilarious."  Trent added.

"Do you know him? Can you introduce us?" I asked, playfully as Monica laughed at me.

"I don't know. Let me see how Uriel feels about that." Trent smirked at me.

"Feels about what?" Uriel asked as he joined us at the end of the 3rd quarter.

"Lily wants to meet Big Rob." Monica informed him.

"Oh? What for?" Uriel asked, eyeing me.

"He's lit. Seems like he would be a good person to turn up with." I answered.

"Sure. I don't know how Mrs. Big Rob would feel about that, but shoot your shot." Uriel grinned at me.

"Maybe he can give you a ride to your car." Forrest muttered and Gigi laughed.

"Shut up Forrest. The game is almost over." I smiled at him.

"It's been over." Uriel shook his head, sadly.

I looked at Uriel, shocked.

"What?" He asked me.

"Nothing... I'm just surprised you admitted it considering how pissed you got at me for saying they were going to lose." I commented and everyone laughed.

"I wasn't pissed... And you said they were going to get swept. Not lose. We weren't swept." He corrected me with a grin.

"Barley."

When the 4th quarter started, Uriel returned back with his colleagues to watch the ending. As soon as he left, Amber asked me who he was and I just waved her off. I wasn't going to explain our relationship in front of everyone.

When the game finally ended with the Mavericks losing, the guys in the box were making plans to go to a strip club to mourn the end of the season. I was surprised when the women planned to go too. I tried to get Forrest to stay out later with the allure of strippers, but he declined. Gigi had work in the morning, so instead of catching the dart rail with Amber, Forrest gave her a ride. Amber was used to staying up all night for her job and was wide awake so we got a ride with Monica to the club.

I imagined the strip club would be a dark, grimy, hole in the wall seedy place. I was pleasantly surprised to see it looked like any upscale sports bar. The only difference was a main stage with 2 poles and topless women working them over. We were escorted to a table across from the main stage. A waitress came over to take our order and after a quick glance at their extensive wine and signature cocktail menu, I stuck with Merlot since I had to drive home and work the next day.

While I wasn't attracted to the strippers, I definitely was drawn to the feminine vibe and empowerment they exuded. I always had the idea of women being objectified by dirty old men, but the strippers had all the control at the club. They commanded the room as they pranced around, partially nude, soliciting dances for guests of all ages and genders. It was fun watching them, imagining what it would feel like.

Amber looked uncomfortable, constantly checking her phone and looking around nervously. I asked her if she was ok, but she put her phone away and nodded. I got her to come with me to tip the dancers on the stage. While we were watching, she got a call and left me to answer it.

I was watching a blonde gracefully spin around a pole when someone stood next to me. I tore my eyes from the stage and saw Uriel.

"You enjoying the show?" He asked in my ear.

"She's alright. Not really my type." I smiled up at him.

"What's your type?" Uriel asked me.

"Umm... Her." I discreetly pointed to a girl across the room. She had long raven hair, a deep bronze tan, smaller, firm breasts and a plump round ass on her petite, tone frame. I would kill for her abs and was debating taking up strip aerobics classes as I watched her dance for a guy.

Uriel watched her as well. "She's alright." He mimicked me.

"Alright? She's gorgeous." I said.

"She's tiny."

"Yes, and?"

"I'm not attracted to small women. I don't like feeling like I could break them."

I smirked and tilted my head. "And you don't have to worry about that with me?"

He looked me over, appreciatively. "No. You can handle whatever I give you."

My body clenched in arousal. Before I could think of a response, Amber came back and we headed to the table. Uriel ordered us another round of drinks and we toasted to the end of the season and getting ready for next year. We drank and chatted with everyone, in between watching the show and getting dances. The dancer I pointed out earlier came over and introduced herself as Desiree to Uriel.

"She would like a dance." Uriel nodded over to me, handing her a twenty.

"Of course handsome." She put the bill in her g-string before dancing in front of me. I watched her as she worked her body seductively to the music. Her confidence and playfulness made for a very sexy dance. After 2 minutes, she turned back to Uriel.

"How about a private dance for you and your girlfriend?" She asked with a flirty smile.

I blushed, about to decline and correct her that I wasn't his girlfriend when Uriel smiled at me. "What do you think?" He asked, challengingly. I had no idea what went on in private rooms, but I couldn't turn down a challenge. I nodded and stood up. His smile widen as he stood up too.

"Lily-" Amber looked at me, eyes wide.

"I'll be right back." I told her as I took Uriel's hand and followed Desiree. We went into a private room that had a couch and a pole.

"How long have you two been together?" She asked us, closing the curtain.

"We're not." I said, sitting on the couch, crossing my legs, anxiously. Uriel sat next to me.

"Why not? I feel chemistry between you two." She smiled, flipping her hair.

"She doesn't want a relationship." Uriel replied, leaning back with his arms draped on the couch.

"Neither does he." I looked over at him.

She laughed at us. "Ok. Any ground rules before we get started?"

"Ladies' choice." He replied with an easy smile at me.

I looked over at her. "Um...No?"

"First time?" She asked.

"Yes."

"I can give you a lap dance instead of the air dance you got out there. I normally don't allow touching, but I'll let you slide." She winked at me. "How bout I dance for you first, then your friend?" She smiled at Uriel.

"Sounds good."

She went and pressed a button and Body Party by Ciara started to play. She did a few spins on the pole before dancing over to me. She pushed my leg aside to uncross and spread them. With a smile and still holding my thighs, she danced between my legs, swiveling her hips to the music. She dropped down low, all the way to the ground before dancing back up, pulling off her top. When she rubbed her bare breasts against me, I felt Uriel's arm over my shoulder. I looked at him and his eyes were glued to the both of us, a pleased smile on his face.

"His turn." I told her.

She quickly complied, dancing over to him and twerking her ass on his lap. I watched him, watching her as his hand crept to the side of my breast. I wasn't sure if he was allowed to touch her, so I grabbed his hand and moved it over my breast. He groaned in pleasure, fondling me as the stripper danced on him. She then straddled him, grinding into his lap. She grinned at me, placing my hands on her breasts. I studied him, loving the pleasure etched on his face as he watched me caress her. I leaned in closer to nibble on his ear.

"Stop." He moaned throwing his head back, his eyes closed shut as he took deep, calming breaths. The girl quickly hopped off his lap and I saw his erection making a budge in his pants. Desiree and I smiled at each other before I motioned her to me. I had no idea what the private room cost, but I wanted to tip her for a great first time private room experience.

I handed her a couple of $20 and thanked her. I was asking about what product she used on her skin, when Uriel recovered, smiling as he shook his head at me.

She laughed but told me the name of some body butter and body spray. Uriel handed her a stack of 20s. When she escorted us out the room, Uriel was still chuckling at me.

"What? She smelt amazing. And her skin was super soft." I said as we made our way back to the table. "You didn't get to touch, but I did." I bragged.

He stopped me before we got back, holding me against his body. "I'd rather touch you. Can I take you home?"

"Amber. I can't just leave her. We came with Monica and she was giving us a ride to my car." I breathed.

"I'll get her an Uber." He said against my ear.

If Amber felt comfortable, that's exactly what I was doing. As we rejoined the table, Amber and some dude sitting next to her in dark glasses and a fitted cap watched us. Amber looked nervous again, and when I got close enough to make out the dude's face, I knew why.

"Christian? What are you doing here?" I asked him, exasperated already. He had the nerve to look pissed off like I was the one intruding on his life.

"Trying to talk to you but I see you're busy." He spat as he stood.

"I'm not busy, I'm over it. I told you that."

"You also told me you weren't ready for a relationship yet, not that you wanted to fuck around like a slut." He glared at Uriel. "You can have her."

I was heated with embarrassment and frustration as I watched him storm off.

"You should go handle that." Uriel told me coldly, pulling away from me.

I turned to him and met his eye. "I already handled it."

"Doesn't look like that way." When he took a seat at the table with everyone else instead of taking me home, I gave him a dirty look before I stalked away. Amber eventually caught up to me as I ordered an Uber on my phone.

"Lily, he wanted to talk to you and clear the air. That's why he came out here." Amber started.

"I don't want to talk to him. I made that clear to you and to him!" I said, not looking up from the Uber App as I requested a driver.

"Maybe I shouldn't have told him where you were-"

"You think?" I glared at her.

"- but he reached out to me, really hurt and confused. He was giving you time to calm down. He thought it was an argument, not a break up-"

"We weren't together!!! How could we break up?" I yelled at her.

Amber shrunk onto herself, intimated, and I instantly felt like shit. "Sorry. I'm not mad at you. Just the situation."

Amber nodded before speaking again. "Whatever you two were doing, it ended so suddenly that he didn't understand. Talk to him so he can move on and leave you alone." Amber urged me.

The Uber showed up and I told the driver the location was different. Amber looked at me sadly when I edited it to her house. When the car pulled off with Amber, I went through my call log until I found Christian's number.

"What?" He answered bitterly.

"Can we talk?" I said, using all my patience to not get annoyed with his attitude.

"About what? How you'd rather be fucked in a sleazy strip club than be my girlfriend? I get it now Lily; do you. I don't care."

I reminded myself that I controlled my reactions, not Christian. After I calmed, I questioned him. "If you don't care, then why are you talking to Amber? Why did you come out here? Why did you answer my call?"

When he didn't say anything, I tried to understand where he was coming from so he would be receptive to what I had to say. "Maybe I handled things badly because I was upset. Before anything happened, I was planning to talk to you about us. If you want to, we can talk. If you want to leave it the way it is, that's fine. Either way, I'm sorry if I hurt you."

"Fine." He said after a beat. "We can talk. Where are you?"

"Outside the sleazy strip club."

"Wait there."

I did until a black Maybach pulled up. The door opened and Christian held it open for me. I got in, closing the door behind me before looking at him.

He started to give the driver my address, but I stopped him and gave him my work address instead.

"So now you don't want me at your house?" Christian sneered at me.

I looked at him, wearily. "No. I need to pick up my car. I got an Uber from my job."

He got quiet again so I started. "It's hard to have a conversation with you being so hostile."

"It's hard for me not be hostile when you told me you didn't want a relationship because you weren't over Trevor. Not because you wanted to fuck other guys." He said.

I ignored his fucking other guys comment and focused on the real issue. "I'm not over Trevor. That's still true, but there were other reasons I didn't want to be in a relationship with you that had nothing to do with other guys."

He glared at me, pissed. "So what, I was just one of your rebounds?"

"You weren't a rebound. Rebounds are just sex. I was having casual sex with someone else, but I was trying to get to know you to see if I wanted to be with you." I admitted.

Christian scoffed. "Were you having casual sex with Richard?"

I sighed. "No. I never slept with Richard and I never well. The reason I didn't want to talk to you after Rocky's party was because I was trying to figure out how to tell you I didn't want a relationship at all. I was going to thank you for being there for me and let you know if we were ever in the same place in the future that maybe we could try dating again. Then you accused me of sleeping with Richard and posted that picture-"

"And you took the easy way out and flipped it on me." He looked at me, hatefully.

"No. It wasn't easy. It was fucked up. You knew posting that picture would upset me- just like you knew calling me a slut tonight would too. Maybe I hurt you, but I never meant to. You intentionally hurt me. I don't want to date someone who would do that to me. I can't even be friends with someone who can't take responsibility for their actions." I finished.

He didn't say anything, just looked away and stared out the window. We sat in silence until the car stopped at my job. I grabbed my bag, pausing to give him an opportunity to say anything else. He didn't, so I got out the car. Hopefully he got whatever he needed to move on.

The next morning, I called Amber to let her know I talked to Christian. She apologized and I told her we were good.

"Are we good Lily? Because I didn't even know about Uriel until Staci told me. The same goes for Christian when you first started dating him. You didn't even tell me you're not speaking to Sammy.  If I did something or something is wrong between us, let me know so I can fix it."

"Amber, we are fine. The only reason Staci knew about Uriel is because she saw me with him just like you did. I didn't tell you about the Sammy thing because I didn't want you in the middle of another fight between us. I'm just trying to figure things out on my own and stop being so damn needy all the time." I assured her.

"It's not needy. It's called support. I love you. I'm here whenever you need me."

"I know. I love you too Amber."

I texted Uriel that night that everything was handled, with a smiley face emoji. He responded congratulations. When I asked about seeing him, he said he was busy but would be in touch. I didn't hear from him the rest of the week.

I had my doctor's appointment with Dr. Pereira on Friday. It turned into a full on bitch fit from me. I complained about Christian's visit, Uriel blowing me off and Amber being insecure about our friendship. I was 30 minutes into my rant when Dr. Pereira stopped me.

"Remember the conversation we had about perception?"

"That it can alert reality. I don't think that's it. I tell myself affirmations all the time and try to stay positive. Even then, people are fucked up. Christian feels like he's vindicated because I slept with someone else. We weren't even together but he's playing the victim to make me the bad guy. Amber is all upset because I don't tell her everything about my life. Seriously, I used to run to my friends with a hang nail and I'm trying not to be that weak insecure person anymore. And Uriel... It was just sex so it's not a big deal but I don't get why he's so butt hurt and wants to end things."

"You've already decided you no longer wish to see Christian, why does it matter if he feels vindicated? You know your truth; he will deal with his own truth. You had years of a co-dependent relationship with Amber, you cannot expect it to change overnight- just keep setting your boundaries. You left Uriel to figure out what happen with Christian. Maybe he needs time to reflect on you two's relationship or maybe he really is busy. You won't know unless you talk to him."

"I know. I know. I'm just saying I'm tried of trying with people. It's exhausting. Why is it always this hard?"

Dr. Pereira looked at me. "You're constantly battling with feelings of abandonment." She answered, bluntly.

I frowned up at her. "Abandonment? We already dealt with that. It's just like you said; my mom leaving had nothing to do with me. I had no control over her."

"I've said it, but do you believe it? If you still are feeling deserted or left out or unworthy, it can cultivate abandonment issues. That would explain you jumping to the worst conclusions, your struggle with codependency, and the string of brief relationships you find yourself in."

Tears of frustration welled up in my eyes. "So how do I deal with that? I've been working on knowing my worth; loving myself and my traits, my appearance, my life, changing my perception, all this bullshit. What else am I supposed to do now?" I blurted.

"I know it's difficult, but life demands us to move on and deal with our issues the best we can. You have to believe that you never drove anyone away: They either had no choice or were too weak to stay, but that has nothing to do with you. If you want to maintain long lasting relationships with anyone, this is something you're going to have to acknowledge and accept. If you don't, you will have a tough time finding others who will stick around as you push them away." Dr. Pereira counseled me.

I nodded and opted to end our appointment early. For the first time ever, I called in sick from work and spent Friday in bed with Justine, Dr. Pereira's words repeating in my head.