Simple Kind of Life (Intro)

"For a long time I was in love
Not only in love, I was obsessed
With a friendship that no one else could touch
It didn't work out, I'm covered in shells
And all I wanted was the simple things
A simple kind of life
And all I needed was a simple man
So I could be a wife
I'm so ashamed, I've been so mean
I don't know how it got to this point
I always was the one with all the love
You came along, I'm hunting you down
Like a sick domestic abuser looking for a fight
And all I wanted was the simple things
A simple kind of life" A Simple Kind Of Life by No Doubt


"Wake up! We got boot camp! Hoorah hoe!" Sammy yelled as she burst into my room.

"Hoe, if you don't get outta here..." I said, putting my phone down to glare at her.

"That's Sergeant Save A Hoe to you. Now c'mon on! Imma do your hair so you don't look a hot mess like you normally do when you work out." She scolded me.

"I don't dress up to work out. I'm not trying to impress anyone." I rolled my eyes.

"That physical trainer we met before the pole dancing class is the instructor for the boot camp. I call dibs by the way. " Sammy added in.

"If you're calling dibs you should be fine with however I look. Less competition." I argued.

"Please." Sammy scoffed like I said the stupidest thing ever. "I don't need you making me look sloppy." She said waiting for me to get out of bed.

"You can get out now. I can get ready by myself." I pointed to the door.

"You got 30 minutes or we're leaving without you." She turned away.

"Don't tempt me." I called after her.

When she was gone, I picked up my phone.

"Pretend like you didn't hear any of that." I told Christian.

"Not going to lie to you- I'm gonna be thinking of you on a pole all day." He grinned.

"Christian!" I smiled at him.

"Seriously... What's your stripper name?"  Christian asked.

"Bye Christian! I have a boot camp to get ready for."

"Watch your 6, over."

I stuck my tongue out at him before hanging up as he laughed. I sighed, relieved Sammy didn't see me on the phone with him. I knew she said she was cool with us talking now, but I still didn't wanna hear her opinions or criticism. At least not while I was still figuring it out on my own.

I got up, went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth and got dressed. I pulled my hair up into a neat top knot before putting on my grey and blue Sketches. They matched great with my blue hooded workout shirt with the phase "Strong is the new Pretty" and grey running tights. It was the most thought I ever put into working out attire and it was all Sammy was getting from me.

After setting food out for Justine, I went upstairs to see if Sammy and Jordan were ready. They were both in the mirror, finishing up their hair. Jordan had her still dyed blonde hair up in a ponytail with a head band while Sammy fixed her grey hair into two French braids. Jordan was dressed in running shorts and a razorback tank while Sammy was in spandex shorts and a tight tank that cut low over her breast.

 "Where is your sports bra?" I asked Sammy, eyeing her overexposed cleavage.

"The bra is built in." She replied, cupping her breasts.

"Your boobs are gonna be all over the place in that." Jordan pointed out.

"That's the point." Sammy smiled.

Sammy put on a hoodie before we left for the gym, thank God. Something about people who went to the gym looking to hook up really irked me, and I didn't want to look guilty by association. Unfortunately, the hoodie came right off as soon as we got to the fitness center.

Mitch, the physical trainer we met earlier in the week, clearly enjoyed Sammy's outfit choice. After the tough routine of biceps curls, jumping squats, shoulder presses, standing skull crushers, rear delt fly, crunches, pushups, upright rows, and pile squats; he made sure to make his way over to us to talk to Sammy.

Sammy flirted hardcore, making me annoyed until I remembered my talk with Dr. Pereira and the need to validate ourselves. Jordan and I stood aside, making faces at each other until I heard Sammy invite the instructor to the day party we were going to on Sunday.

"What happened to it being a girls weekend Sammy?" I reminded her, pointedly.

"It's a big restaurant- We can't control who's going to be there." Sammy gave me brief smile before turning back to Mitch.

After Sammy exchanged numbers with Mitch, we went to Snappy Salads for lunch. I tried to bring up Corey to Sammy, hoping to see where her head was at and dissuade her from hooking up with random guys, but she shut me down. She claimed she was getting back to doing her thing with the unnecessary complications of relationships. It made me disappointed to see that's what she took from her relationship with Corey, but I left it alone.

After lunch, we went back to my house to shower and change. When I went into the kitchen and saw Justine picked at her food again, I immediately hopped on my tablet to see of if I could figure out what was going on with her.

Justine rested her head in my lap and I petted her as I researched dogs not eating. There were so many different reason why a dog's eating habits would change. With no other symptoms, it was impossible to narrow it down. I read dogs wouldn't go a few days without eating and Justine wasn't at that point yet. Another thread suggested changing the dog food and seeing if that made a difference, so I decided to try that first. If it didn't work, I was taking her to a vet, more symptoms or not.

While I was online, I saw that Benjamin sent me an email. It contained the contact information for my mom. My stomach churned nervously when I saw a possible phone number, email and mailing address. She had the maiden name Harris, meaning she never got married or maybe she just never changed her name. The address was in Virginia Beach, Virginia. I knew nothing about Virginia. I wondered how'd she end up there, if she had a family, or if she ever thought about reaching out to me. The only way I was going to find out was to ask. I was contemplating whether I should call, email or write when Jordan joined me in the living room.

"I just talked to Blake..." she began sitting next to me on the couch.

"And? What did he say about Serena?" I asked, exiting from my email.

"Nothing. I didn't ask and he didn't offer any details. I told him I would see him tomorrow and we'd talk then."

"What? Why? Aren't you anxious to know what they talked about?"

"Duh! I don't want him to know that. I want him to think I trust him and I'm cool with him talking to his ex, alone, on a Friday night."

"You are?" I asked, admirably.

"No way! It's killing me. I wanted to tell him not to meet with her, but I have to trust him." She sighed deeply. "I'm not gonna worry about it until tomorrow. What are we seeing tonight?" Jordan asked.

I turned back on my tablet so we could pick out a movie. Sammy had a gig she had to check on, so we picked a late night showing of Sisters. After Sammy left, Jordan and I went to Petco and I picked out a new brand of dog food. I got wet and dry and a few new treats for Justine to try. We then met up with Rocky, Jackie and her daughter Ressa to get our nails done.

"What did y'all do last night?" Rocky asked us as we sat down.

Jordan and I grinned at each other, before we shook our heads and replied, "Nothing."

"Just went to one of Sammy's event, got home, drank a little-" I started.

"A lot." Jordan chimed in.

I smiled. "Then fell asleep. What about you?"

"I told Brandon I was dating last night." Rocky announced.

"What? How'd he take it?" Jackie asked her.

"I don't know. He didn't react at all." Rocky said, frowning up.

"How'd you tell him?" I asked, picking out a nude nail color with ombre gold glitter on both ring fingers.

"He came over, we finished Ace's room and I told him I was seeing someone. He said he had to go and left." Rocky recounted.

"Much better than him crying like last time you told him you didn't wanna be with him. Be glad you dodged that bullet" Jackie snorted. Ressa snickered too, but I could tell Rocky didn't find it funny. She stiffened up in her chair.

"I mean, that sounds like the mature way to handle it. He probably needed to sort out his feelings, that's all." I suggested, simply.

"What's the new guy like? How long have you been dating?" Jordan asked.

"It's Forrest. We've been seeing each other since November." Rocky said, visibly relaxing in her chair.

"Really?" Jordan looked at me, gauging my reaction.

I smiled. "Forrest has liked her for awhile. I'm glad they finally figured it out."

 Jordan smiled too. "Aww, wow. That's really sweet."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Jackie demanded, fixing a harsh look at Rocky.

"Like Lily said, we were figuring things out. Make sure you lose his number now." Rocky said, shooting a look at Jackie too.

Rocky and Jackie were having some type of nonverbal communication with looks. It was painfully awkward for the rest of the time as I pretended not to notice. Obviously it didn't end well because as soon as we finished our nails, Jackie flaked out on the movie plans and she and Ressa left. I wasn't disappointed she was gone-well, maybe for Ressa's sake, but she was probably too young for the movie anyway.

I desperately wanted to know what was up with the Jackie losing Forrest's number comment, but I stopped myself from asking. If Rocky wanted to share, that was one thing. I wasn't going to meddle in whatever was going on between the two (or three?) of them.

We went back to my place to get ready for the movie. I took Justine for a run before feeding her. Normally, it was the other way around, but I wanted to see if I could work up an appetite with her first. When we got back home, I fixed her dog bowl with wet food and water. She sniffed at the bowl before digging in. I smiled watching her as she ate with enthusiasm, something I hadn't seen in a long time. I patted her head before I went to shower and change.

I was super excited to get a text from Staci saying she would make it to the movie after all. When I invited her, she told me she had a date and wouldn't be able to join us. I sent her what movie theatre we would be at and she said she would see us there.

Sammy, Peyton, Jordan, Rocky and I got our tickets and found Staci at the beer, nursing a margarita. She launched into her story about a bad set-up one of her friends at work sent her on.

"He was so boring. No personality at all. I have no idea why Sean though we might hit it off. I wanted to hit him by the end of the date." Staci complained, dramatically.

"That's why I don't do blind dates or set ups. It never works out well." Sammy commented before ordering a drink.

"You're right. I don't have enough free time. I can't waste it on guys I could rule out in one conversation. I'm trying online dating." Staci declared.

"Because people are so honest online." Rocky said, sarcastically.

"I met my boyfriend Chris online. We've been together for 5 years." Peyton informed us.

"And still no ring?" Jordan asked, shocked.

"We don't want to get married. We're happy the way things are." Peyton replied.

"But why?" Jordan continued, horrified.

"'Cause she likes her freedom. No bullshit ring holding her back, she can drop him whenever she wants- No drama." Sammy answered for her.

"That's not why-" Peyton began before Sammy cut her off.

"I met a guy today. Personal trainer. He and his friends are coming thru the day party tomorrow." Sammy said hintingly.

"Don't get too excited. He's super young and lame so I bet his friends are too." I smirked.

"I'll take lame if he's cute." Staci piped up, interested.

"Da fuck?" I asked Staci. "What about ruling guys out?"

"I haven't seriously dated since high school and I don't think that even counts." Staci admitted.

"It doesn't." Rocky quipped from her seat. We all laughed.

"See? Now I know, boring guys are out. Who knows about lames. I need to date a little to figure out what I want." Staci answered.

"You might wanna try it before dating fucking Christian." Sammy called me out.

Everyone looked at me when I choked on the coke I was sipping. "No one is dating Christian."

"Can you slide his number to me then?" Staci requested which I ignored.

"Jordan told me all about your drunken dial and I got into your phone last night." Sammy declared.

"I'm changing my password you bitch." I exclaimed.

"Yeah, you really should change it from anything related to Trevor, especially now that you know Christian likes you too." She said, quoting his text.

"Whateva." I bristled, ready to change the subject.

"Not whatever. If you start something with Christian, your basically closing the door on you and Trevor forever. Consider that while you're seeing what happens." Sammy stated.

"Trevor and I aren't together. It doesn't matter who I date." I argued.

"You think? What if tomorrow Trevor decides to date Jordan-"

"Hey, keep me out of it!" Jordan shook her head.

"No, you're the perfect example Jordan. You're friendship ended because Lily was uncomfortable with your behavior around him." Sammy turned back to me. "Even though Trevor assured you not to worry, they're just friends, there's nothing going on, trust him... Then out of nowhere, they start seeing each other. How would that make you feel?" Sammy questioned me.

"Homicidal." I confessed, rubbing my temples.

"Exactly how Trevor felt when he thought you and Christian were dating. You can't do that to him and hope you still have a shot at getting back together. I don't see it happening."

I was quiet as I thought it over.

"You don't need to figure it out tonight." Rocky said gently, patting my hand.

"Just before you try anything with Christian. Don't do it if you still love Trevor." Sammy ended.

All of a sudden, I needed something stronger than a coke.

"You should just give me Christian's number. Problem solved." Staci joked.

"If you don't shut up..." I trailed off before I forced a smile.

Even the comedy duo of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler couldn't get my mind off of everything. I didn't know why relationships were always so hard for me. As much as I loved Trevor, everything was just- hard now. No matter how much I liked Christian, it was too messy. At the end of all my questioning, conflicting feelings and self doubt, I came to one conclusion. I decided what I deserved and what I wanted-I didn't want hard or messy anymore. I was tried of everything being so complicated. I wanted and deserved simplicity so that's what I was going for.

When I got home, I stayed up late writing and rewriting a letter to my mom. I decided to just mail her my contact information and let her get in touch with me. I wanted it to be simple and easy, but unfortunately neither one of those things came natural to me. I set it aside to try again later.


*Sorry It's late. I fell asleep while editing last night. I'm halfway done with the 2nd part of this post and I have an author's note coming today too.