Sunday, December 7, 2014

Like I Love You

"Ain't nobody love you like I love you
You're a good girl and that's what makes me trust ya
Late at night, I talk to you
You will know the difference when I touch you
Yeah, you know I can make ya happy
I could change your life
If you give me that chance
To be your man
I won't let you down baby
If you give me that chance
To be your man" Like I Love You by Justin Timberlake

I woke up before Trevor on Saturday and raided his refrigerator. Or I tried to. He had nothing of substance. I finally found instant coffee, but there was no creamer. I should have known better. I made sure my kitchen was stocked with the basics for my house guests. I should have gone shopping for Trevor too.

I groaned and closed the refrigerator. My stomach ignored, I took a shower and set up my make-up and hair supplies on the counter of the sink and got ready for our day.

We were going out to shop for party supplies. We stayed up the night before approving the final guest list and sending out the e-vites. Trevor didn't bat an eye when I said Jake. I didn't say a thing when he invited Amber. He did ask about Sammy when I told him to invite her. I told him about the talk we had. He nodded and said, "About time."

"You knew?" I asked, surprised. He nodded.

"How?"

"I asked." Trevor said, smugly.

I kicked him.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked, over his groan.

"It wouldn't have mattered. You're stubborn, you have to do everything your way, even if it means the hard way." Trevor said.

I had no rebuttal for that, so I said nothing.

 I didn't realize how much work Trevor already put into the party until I saw the invitations. They were cute, 30 second videos featuring us as bobble heads inviting everyone to our party over what was the opening theme to MTV's show Super Sweet Sixteen. It was so funny and basically informed me that the party was gonna be like all the previous parties I had with Trevor: over the top and childish.

I finished brushing out my hair when I heard Trevor finally thumping around in his room. I already started my make-up when he finally appeared in the doorway of the bathroom.

"Good morning." He said, tiredly.

"Is it a good morning? Without coffee or eggs or freaking cereal?" I said, sarcastically, looking him over briefly. He looked cute all wrinkled and sleepily in boxer shorts and a t-shirt.

"If you can wait, I'll treat you to breakfast." He said, moving past me to turn on the shower.

"No I can't. You break the fast for a reason. Can you drive without fuel? No. I need energy: food or coffee." I explained to him.

He gave me a lopsided grin. "Conserve some of your energy. You don't need all that make-up and hair crap. Go natural."

"It takes more hair and make-up crap to look natural, but you wouldn't understand that-" I began to educate him. I got distracted when he removed his shirt. Trevor does not work out, but he's naturally lean. No bulging muscles, but he has a nice, toned body. I got distracted studying him. He grinned before jumping in the shower.

"Fine… Save energy and be quiet!" He called out, before throwing out his boxers.

I bit my lip and concentrated on my make-up. I was conserving my energy by not jumping in the shower with him. I wasn't sure what I would do after getting in the shower too... Attack him or attack him.

After quickly finishing my make-up and pulling my hair back, I returned to Trevor's room and threw on jeans and a long-sleeved white shirt. I knew I would be trying on outfits, so I kept it simple. I literally had no idea what I wanted to wear to my party. Besides it being at the Night Hotel in Dallas on December 13th, I had no idea what all Trevor planned. I waited in the living room to avoid any more run-ins with a half-dressed Trevor.

I checked my messages and saw I had a text from Jake.

Jake: So you're having your party on the same night my dad is getting married?

Oh fuck. I completely forgot about that.

Me: OMG. That's a huge coincidence. My birthday is the 3rd, Trevor's is the 10th. It just worked out that way...

Jake: Ok. I'll try to make it. What are you doing on your actual birthday?

Me: I don't know... Maybe dinner?..

Jake: Maybe let me know?...

Me: Of course :-)

When Trevor finally emerged, dressed in jeans and a vintage shirt under a button down, we hit the road. True to his words, the first place we stopped was IHOP for breakfast. We both had omelets, holiday pancakes, and coffee before heading to mall.

We went into Spencer's first and brought a few adult party games. We got Dirty minds, fool around dice, and Who's The Biggest Pervert Drinking Game. When Trevor informed me he planned to have Truth or Dare and Musical chairs too, I finally saw Trevor's vision for our party: A kid birthday party with an adult twist!

It was perfect! I was getting more excited for the party! I even brought myself and Trevor party hats. Mine was a tiara that read: Birthday Bitch. His was a trucker hat that said: It’s My Mother Fucking Birthday!

I took a selfie of us wearing our hats and posing with rock star faces, tongues sticking out and all and posted it on Facebook with the caption:

Let the countdown begin…

Now that I saw the vision for the party, I knew what look I wanted for my party. I wanted long, Kim Kardashian waves in my hair, full makeup, and a feminine, but sexy poofy, pink dress.

“Pink?” Trevor groaned, dramatically, as we walked into a department store.

“Yes! Come on! It would look so cute!” I said, excitedly. "And it fits the theme!"

“Yeah, for a GIRL.”

“Bruno Mars wore pink on SNL.” I told him.

“I don’t wanna look like Bruno Mars.”

“You couldn’t pull it off anyway.”

“I know. I’m too good looking.”

I snickered at him. “Right…”

“Bruno Mars is not that great looking.”

“When did you become the judge of good looking guys?” I said in mock horror.

“Shut up Lily. I’m straight enough to acknowledge another man’s attractiveness.”

“Keep telling yourself that.” I teased him. “Besides, Bruno Mars has swag. He doesn’t have to be great looking.”

“You keep telling yourself that.” Trevor threw back at me.

I stuck my tongue out at him before making my way through the racks of dresses. Trevor was absolutely no help. If anything, he hindered my search with his distracting commentary and his repeated questioning if I was ready. He moaned and groaned when I didn’t find anything at the first store, so I sent him away to the food court as I kept searching.

I was in the dressing room at my 4th shop when I got a call from Trevor.

“Where are you?” he asked.

“Dressing room.”

“What store?”

“Some boutique by the ice rink.”

"Wanna go ice skating?" He asked me.

"No! I wanna find my dress!" I exclaimed.

I got off the phone and removed the last disaster of a dress. I sighed, frustrated. Maybe pink wasn’t working for me…

I put the dresses away and walked out. Trevor was waiting with a pretzel for me.

"Cinnamon sugar or salt?"

"Salt." I said, snatching the salted pretzel from him. I took a bite before groaning.

"No dress?"

I shook my head, defeated.

"One more store then we'll call it a day?" He compromised.

I nodded.

We went into DEB. This time, Trevor picked out every pink dress in my size. I vetoed a lot of them, but I saw a few I would at least try on. I tried two pink dresses before I found the dress I wanted. I came out the dressing room and modeled it for Trevor. He just stood there, staring at me, an unreadable expression on his face.

"I know it's extra poofy and promy, but I love it! It's short, but I could do stockings or boots for my bad ankle. And it's not really a true pink, so you could wear peach or tan and still match-"

"Lily." He stopped me.

"Yeah?" I said, looking him in the eye.

"I would wear pepto pink if it meant you wearing that dress."

I grinned. "Well, I guess it's a good thing you picked out this one and not a pepto pink."

Trevor smiled back at me. "I picked that out?"

I rolled my eyes and went back into the dressing room.

Trevor was over shopping, but he promised he'd pick up something appropriate for himself. After calling Rocky and her texting that she and her family were at the movies, we planned to go back to Trevor's apartment. I made him go grocery shopping first. We talked as we made broccoli beef and rice together.

"I'm thinking of having a dinner on my actual birthday, maybe a happy hour somewhere. Hopefully after a few drinks I'd be open to talking to Amber." I said, over the sounds of sizzling steak in the skillet and classic rock playing from Trevor's phone.

"No. Talk to her before your b-day. Rocky has something planned for Wednesday." Trevor said.

I turned to him. "What? Who's all included?" I asked.

"It's a surprise, but just y'all girls." Trevor told me, as he cut up some broccoli. "What?" He asked, when he looked up and saw me frowning.

"Nothing." I said, walking over to him. I made him curl up his fingers up so he didn't chop his fingers off.

"Our party is on the same night Jake's dad is getting married. I'll doubt he'll make it, but he was wondering if I was doing anything Wednesday." I explained.

"Believe me, you don't wanna miss what Rocky has planned for him." Trevor said.

I mixed brown sugar, soy sauce, water, ginger and flour together in a bowl before I responded to him.

"Jake is a good person. You shouldn't make him out to be a bad guy and me as a victim. It wasn't like that."

"Agree to disagree on that one." Trevor said, stiffly. "Ready for this?" He asked, motioning to the vegetables. I nodded, and he dumped them in the skillet.

"Just stir it." I instructed him. When he did, I started again. "Jake is just-"

"Lily, I get that you wanna be his friend but you're not going to get me to change my opinion on him." Trevor cut me off.

I sighed. "Fine. I just don't want any more issues between you two. Jake wasn't comfortable with our friendship, but he never talked negatively about you-"

Trevor chuckled. "No, he just made you feel bad about being yourself."

"Even you have made comments about the way I act with guys. Don't act like it was completely unwarranted because it was towards you." I argued.

Trevor took a break from stirring to look at me.

"The way you act was never the problem. Anyone who really knows you knows how loyal you are. I just hate how you're loyal to guys who don't deserve it; That don't deserve you." Trevor told me.

I mulled that over as I added the sauce. Trevor started stirring again and we finished cooking without anything else said between us.

Trevor turned off his music and we sat down with our plates and water and ate in front of the TV.

"You know what my greatest fear is?" I asked Trevor when we finished eating.

Trevor grinned. "Karaoke?"

"I'm serious!" I smiled.

"Me too!" He laughed. I laughed with him.

"Ok, my second biggest fear?"

"What is it?" Trevor asked.

"That you have this perfect view of me and if we get together you're gonna be so disappointed." I admitted.

"Lily, I know you're not perfect. I can list the things wrong with you, if you want..." He teased.

"No, I got it..." I smirked.

"I also know how you deserved to be treated. Even if we never get together, I'm not gonna be ok with anyone who treats you less than what you deserve. " Trevor finished.

"Do you feel like you deserved my loyalty?" I asked him after a beat.

"Maybe not the whole time, but I do now. You already have my loyalty. My greatest fear is that you'll never give me a chance to show you."

I smiled at him. "I already see it T-Rev."

The rest of the evening was much lighter. We spent it on cleaning up the kitchen before returning to Trevor's bedroom. We laid together, both playing on Facebook, looking at the people who said they were coming to the party and finalizing plans.

I put my phone away and laid against Trevor's chest. "Did I thank you for the birthday party?" I yawned.

"Don't thank me yet." Trevor smiled.

"I already know it's gonna be amazing." I said, dreamily, closing my eyes.

I fell asleep before he replied.

--------

Sunday we got dressed and headed over to Rocky's house. On the drive over, I got a call from my dad. He was asking if Cam told me the news about the engagement. I said yes, excitedly, leaving out the point that I helped him propose.

"Cameron said you wanted to host an engagement party. Let's plan it for when you all come home for the holidays."

I made a face. "Sounds great dad." I lied. It sounded awful. 'Let's' meant him planning an engagement party filled with Cam's old classmates or dad's business associates. Not how I would plan it at all, but whatever. He could have it. I was picking my battles.

I got off the phone a little after that. Trevor smiled at me. "What sounds 'great'?" He asked, knowingly as we pulled into Rocky's driveway.

"Planning Cam's engagement party with my dad." I said, sarcastically.

Trevor laughed as we made our way into the house. Rocky's family was gathered, getting ready to hit the road.

"Don't be a stranger, ya hear?" Mama Smith said, bringing me in a hug.

"I won't." I said, hugging her back.

"Remember, you are a grown woman." She emphasized, looking over a Trevor. "Make smart decisions or I will come back up here!" She threatened.

I nodded. "I will, I promise."

After saying goodbye to everyone, Trevor drove me home.

"What are you going to do for the rest of the day?" Trevor asked me.

"Make smart decisions." I smiled, hugging him before hopping out the car.

When I went inside, I pulled out my phone. I waited for the phone to pick up before I said, "Hey, wanna work out together?"



15 comments:

Anonymous said...

I feel like I can't figure out where this is going at all, because Trevor and Lily have such an amazing connection and a good time together but she's always defending Jake, and I'm sure she's calling him to workout. She's at least gotta be clear about where she stands with Jake if she wants to see where it goes with Trevor. Plus, the physical side with him could be the best she's ever had because of the emotional aspect....

Anonymous said...

I agree with you but I think (hope) she called Amber to work out

Anonymous said...

Am I just a weirdo hard headed? Because I don't get what was so awful about jake's behavior while they were dating. I don't think he was trying to change her. But she wasn't the greatest girlfriend anyway, always flirting with others.
How is it that is not ok for Jake to act jealous while they were dating, but people forget how Trevor acted when she was hooking up with Ethan. He was so jealous he even told Cam about it, and got her in trouble, and they were not even dating! And then how he acted when he found out she was dating Jake? He was so rude to her and even hooked up with sammy to get back at her probably. I still like Trevor, just saying neither guy is perfect specially when jealousy is involved.
I get that lily is very confused and doesn't know what to do, but I feel that she's giving them both hope. I wish she would just let Jake go, if she wanted to be with him, she could've made it work a long time ago. If you really love someone you make things work and you forgive their mistakes. Maybe try this new relationship with Trevor see where things go, they obviously have chemistry and they have fun together. You can "find yourself" while being in a relationship also. It's not fair to use that excuse to not be with Trevor.
Luita
Happy belated birthday Janay! I'm so jealous you went to see JT, I hear he puts on an awesome show.

Anonymous said...

I think it was Amber.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you, I don't think Jake was bad when they were together. He had his issues for sure, but he's made it clear he's working on it. If you love someone, and they wanna work on themselves, why not give it another go?? I really don't know how her and Trevor would be together, but they're not as exciting as Jake and Lily were together...

Anonymous said...

I dont think she called Jake, at all. She's making a smart decision by deciding to workout. She may have called Amber or Sammy, most probably Amber.

I dont agree with Trevor's opinion on Jake. Trevor was also a jerk at first. He got a million chances to make it right and finally he's good now. Jake was like that with lily because of Cara and now hr wants to make it right. Trevor makkng Lily the victim here is looking at it too much in black/white. I like Trevor and I love their friendship. Dont think it should be more than that.
Dahlia

Shann Mack said...

Agreed. Jake wasn't that bad. They had issues but everyone does. And I think Lily is completely stringing poor Trevor along. Sleeping in his bed and flirting.... Rude. If you don't know what you want from him back off. He can't find happiness if he's attached to you day and night.

Also, adults who make this big of a deal out of anything but their 30th birthday are lame so I really hope lily is turning 30

Janay333 said...

Thank you Luita! This was my first time seeing him in concert. I didn't think I could love him more... I do! Its an amazing show. 3 hours straight of him singing and dancing. I normally don't do big arena concerts, only cause I'm not a huge crowd person, but everyone was up on their feet, singing and dancing along. It was so fun!

All of you made great points... The number one reason Lily doesn't want to be in a relationship is because she doesn't know what she wants. Hopefully she'll figure it out. She's youngish. 25, so she's turning 26. And apparently lame! Me and my friends are too. We celebrate like this over any and all birthdays lol

Anonymous said...

I disagree with dahlia, Trevor may have said a couple rude comments but he was never a jerk. Jake was more then just a jerk at times and you can't blame his controlling and jealousy issues all on Cara it's like saying the devil made him do it. They were together a month and he had a real hard time saying sorry he usually just threw a fit, Trevor at least said sorry for how he acted then didn't act like that anymore

Anonymous said...

Wow I don't know how anyone can say Jake wasn't bad during their one month relationship or that he was working on it because he wasn't, he didn't even acknowledge anything until he finally realized he lost her. Come on don't you remember the fit her threw about Corey and demanding her phone then demanding she leave, or all the times he ran off and made her come groveling. Seriously red flags in such a short relationship and reading about her and Trevor is exciting and I don't cringe when I read about them together like I did with her and jake. But I understand not everyone always agrees. JJ

Anonymous said...

No he for sure had issues but I don't think he was as bad as everyone makes him out to be. I would think him realizing his mistakes and working on them is HUGE. A lot of people don't own up to their actions. There's nothing wrong with a second chance when a person is willing to change and work on their insecurities. The whole Corey thing was way out of line, I agree, but those situations aren't always a deal breaker.

Lee said...

I completely agree with all the team Jake comments. I couldn't have expressed it better myself. Luita you really hit the nail on the head! & happy belated bday Janay! Really crossing my fingers for Jake & Lily.

Anonymous said...

Man hope she doesn't go back with jake, for all those who like jake why can't she be friends with him. They didn't love each other enough to make it work

Anonymous said...

Can Lilly and Trevor please get together already!!!!!!!! ugh!! This is my favorite blog!! I check everyday to see if there is a new post!! Thank you!

Anonymous said...

I agree w the above commenters. Jake did some crappy things but it's not like Lily was an amazing gf. She also did crappy things. And Trevor was douchey for a while tho, so I'm not sure why everyone wants to act like Trevor has never wronged Lily. She just needs to make a choice, bc right now all 3 of them are just in limbo and that's not fair to anyone.