Just Friends

***It's my birthday! Enjoy this super long post and cliffhanger and check back for another post Friday!***




"Just friends, lovers no more
Just friends but not like before
To think of what we've been
And not to kiss again
Seems like pretending
It isn't the ending
Two friends drifting apart
Two friends but one broken heart
We loved, we laughed, we cried
Suddenly love died
The story ended
But we're just friends
Two friends drifting apart
Two friends but one broken heart
We loved, we laughed, we cried
Suddenly love died
The story ended
But we're just friends" Just Friends

At work on my break Friday, I saw that Megan posted a status on Facebook about EJ's excellent report card. I liked the status and sent a text to Ethan, asking if he had EJ the upcoming weekend so I could take him go-karting like I promised. I was checking the weather when Ethan responded he would take EJ. I thought about his response before calling him as I updated the huddle board at the end of the day.

"I promised EJ if his conduct improved I would take him." I reminded him.

"I figured with everything going on with you, I would honor it and take him myself." Ethan said.

"Part of the reward is that I take him. I'm sure he rather go with me." I said, reasonably calm considering he thought there was a lot going on in my life. Did he mean Trevor?

"I'm sure he rather go with his friend than either one of us-"

"Ok, I'll take them both."

"Ok, we'll go together."

"Why? Cause you can't trust me? I can handle two kids. What do you think is going to happen?" I snapped, irritable.

"No... I trust you with EJ. Jayden's parents don't really know you. I can't say the same for them." Ethan explained.

I flushed, embarrassed. "Oh. Right. You can tag along, but it's still my thing."

"The weather looks good for Sunday afternoon."

"A school night?" I asked, not wanting to miss my weekly Skype chat with Trevor.

We texted during the week daily and we would call each other if we had news to share. We got in a habit of face-timing on Sundays too. I pretty much begged him to the first Sunday after his last round of chemo. He said he was doing ok but I wanted to see so for myself. He looked exhausted, but my heart melted when I saw he was wearing the t-shirt and beanie cap I gave him. He kept up the tradition every Sunday night- it was nice because Sunday night was always our chill time before the week started.

"No. The kids are out of school all next week for Thanksgiving. We can try for Saturday, there's just a chance for rain."

"No, Sunday is perfect. Just early afternoon. I have plans that night."

"Can I pick you up? Or do you wanna drive?" Ethan asked.

"You can drive. I'll see you then."

"See you."

"Dr. Harris?" I looked up to see Dr. Charles hanging in the doorway. "Last patient just left."

"Ok. Go ahead and start shutting down the equipment." I instructed him.

"Yes ma'am." He saluted me.

I smiled at him politely before he left. At least I could keep my emotions in check with Dr. Charles. An athletic trainer named Monica came to me, breathing fire, asking to speak to Dr. Clayton. I told her he was gone for the day, but I was the team lead. She looked me over critically before explaining she had been trying to change a player's injury status with the team doctor for a week now. I apologize even though I had no idea what she was talking about.

I pulled up the client's chart and saw Dr. Charles was working with the player exclusively. I sent in the request for the change, gave Monica my personal number if she had anymore request and called Dr. Charles in for a meeting as soon as she left. Anyone else I would have chalked it up as an innocent mistake. There was no doubt in my mind he purposely didn't follow the chain of command and tell me about the change. He was constantly testing my limits so I calmly informed him I was coaching him and the next time I had to talk to him would be a written notice.

He had been "no ma'am" and "yes ma'am" since I gave him a verbal warning. When Monica called to thank me and apologize, she mentioned he was being passive aggressive with her now too. I dealt with him with a smile on my face and a "fuck you" in my head. If I could have that control in my personal life as I did professionally, I would be set. Maybe it was because my relationships outside of work didn't effect my paycheck- which was spent on therapy so I could learn how to control myself. I made a mental note to mention that connection  to Dr. Pereira.



Saturday morning, I went to my house and looked at the new appliances in the kitchen. The kitchen was the last major area I was remodeling and now that the appliances were here I could start making changes.

I checked to make sure everything was clear before I let Justine off her leash to explore. As I walked through, I noticed a lot of my things that were in the garage were now placed around the house- like my washer and dryer in the laundry room, or my table in dining room. The red living room set that Sammy and I picked out for our apartment together was set up in the living room. My items in my storage unit were the only things I moved to the house. I figured there was no point of paying for storage when I had an empty 2 car garage. The house just looked vacant before, now with the merger furnishing and appliances, it looked kinda sad.

I connected my phone to my speaker and turned on my girl power playlist. Rihanna, Beyonce, Old school Fergie and Pink blasted through the speaker and thoughout the house, improving my mood and drowning out the lonely quietness. I got started on the cabinets in the kitchen. Richard introduced me to the paint kits in the bathrooms. It transformed the look without having to replace the sturdy but outdated cabinets.

I was working on a bottom cabinet when I heard the garage go up. I recognized Richard's voice and continued working. I dropped my paint brush when I heard the voice with him.

"What the hell are y'all doing here?" I asked, barely holding back my contempt as I stood. Richard stopped in his tracks, struggling with a counter high table.

"What are you hiding, jumping out of corners for?" Richard asked me.

"It's my house. What are you doing here?" I repeated.

"I got you a get deal on a table." Richard told me.

"I have a table- you moved it from the garage, remember?"

"This is going to be in the kitchen." Richard informed me. They continued to the kitchen, placing it in the open area that leads to the backyard.

"The house looks great so far. When are you moving in?" Jake asked me. I was hoping if I ignored him, he would disappear. Didn't work.

Richard made a stupid sound with his lips and I glared at him. He told me all the time I could move in, I just hadn't gotten around to it yet.

"I haven't set a date yet." I answered, plainly.

"Are you seeing it? We shave down the legs, make it the same height as the counter. The top will match the counter tops. The legs match the dining room table and the cabinets if you're doing them right." Richard said, quite pleased with himself as he looked over my work.

I saw it, and I loved it, but I didn't tell him that. "I am, thank you very much."

"You're supposed to be thanking me."

"Don't hold your breath."

Jake looked between us, before heading for the door. "I'm going to get the chairs."

When he left, Richard narrowed his eyes at me. "This is a substitute nook and island you don't have space for. What's up with the attitude?"

"I would have appreciated a phone call. Especially if you're going to have my ex deliver it." I hissed at him.

"I needed trunk space. He volunteered."

"Doesn't your roommate work part time at a moving company his brother owns?"

"Key word- work. As in gets paid. I arranged free labor for you. The guy that sold it to me knocked off $500 to pick it up today. You're  welcome." He said.

Jake came back with two cushioned barchairs. I had no rebuttal, so I muttered, "Thank you."

Richard gave me a smile. "I got lighting for the laundry room too. Go look. It's my present to you. Happy birthmas."

I walked into the laundry room and sitting to the side was a beautiful chandelier. I smiled at it. My moment was ruined when Jake followed me.

"Have you decided what you're doing outside? You remember my stepdad owns a nursery?" He said.

"Um, that's going to wait until next spring. Unless you can get me a friends and family discount." I said, dryly.

"We're friends right?"

"You tell me. I thought we were cool until you started blowing me off. I heard an interesting theory on what changed." I said, crossing my arms.

"Oh great. What Sammy have to say about it?" Jake asked, amused.

I ignored his correct assumption. "You have no interest in being my friend if you don't want to sleep with me."

"She was partially right." Jake shrugged.

I looked at him, disgusted. "You have a girlfriend! Even if you didn't, I wouldn't sleep with you!"

"I said, she was partially right.  When we first broke up, the only reason I agreed to be your friend is because I thought there was a chance of us getting back together. I don't normally stay friends with women I dated." Jake admitted.

"So don't. I'm fine with that." I bristled.

"Let me finish. When Brandon and Rocky broke up, I didn't think there was a reason for us to even be around each other. Until I found out I was dating one of your friends."

I shook my head. "Dino and I are not friends. We're more like acquaintances."

"Regardless, it was weird for me."

"Because you made it weird. I was cool about it."

"Remember Jordan calling y'all dick sisters? That was your friend." He reminded me.

I snickered. "Ex-friend. It's kinda funny when you think about it."

"It wasn't to me. At least, not at the time." Jake paused. "Look, we're gonna be around each other for at least 18 years. I know I'm going to be God Father or an uncle. You're going to be God Mother or an aunt too. That makes us family."

I shook my head. "No. I'm a second mom"

Jake smiled. "Ok. Whatever you wanna be, it would be cool if we could be friends or at least distant relatives. You know, the one's you acknowledge but don't hang out with?"

I thought about it. "Fine. I want a family discount on my backyard then."

Jake grinned. "Done. What all do you want back there?"

"A pool, an outdoor kitchen, maybe a fire pit. I haven't decided yet." I threw out there.

"Damn. I was thinking a palm tree or two."

"I'll take those too."

I spent the remainder of the day planning the kitchen and ordering supplies with Richard after Jake left. I went home and thought about picking a moving date, but I decided to put it off until after the holidays.

Sunday afternoon, Ethan arrived right on time to pick me up.

"Hey EJ! Hi Jayden!" I said, hopping in the passenger seat of Ethan's truck. I gave Ethan a smile and he nodded in return.

"Hi Lily." EJ said, excitedly.

"Hi Miss Lily. Thanks for inviting me." Jayden said politely.

"Thank EJ. He's the one that earned a great report card. Now that I know you can do it, I want the same or better on your next progress report." I smiled at him after I put on my seat belt.

"Can we got to Holiday in the Park if do?" EJ asked.

"If you don't, you can hang up going anyway besides school and back." Ethan responded.

His friend Jayden chuckled.

"Did you get all 3's too Jayden?" I put him on the spot as well.

"I'm in 4th grade. I got A's and B's." Jayden bragged.

"You got a C." EJ was quick to point out.

"In drama. It doesn't count." Jayden argued.

"Does too." EJ argued back.

"Nuh-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"What was Serena up to this weekend? Working?" I asked Ethan, trying to make conversation while the boys went back and forth.

"No, she was off." Ethan answered.

"She didn't want to join us?"

"No, she's not a go-kart fan."

"She's boring." EJ complained.

"I can turn the car around." Ethan warned him.

"Sorry." He grumbled unconvincingly.

The rest of the car ride was quiet. When we arrived at the amusement park, the boys jumped out the car. I already purchased passes for them so Ethan wouldn't try to pay for it. There were just tall enough to drive alone. They headed straight for the line at the first race track and Ethan and I found a spot along the railing. We spent the afternoon following them around, watching them race and have a blast. We kept things casual, mostly talking about how much EJ has grown.

Ethan bought them game cards so they could play in the arcade behind my back when I went to the restroom. I decided against playing with them and I found a table by the snack bar to talk to Ethan.

"I'm sorry if I was short with you the other day-" I started when we were alone.

"It's no problem. I know you have a lot on your plate." Ethan brushed it off

"It's no excuse so don't excuse my behavior." I told him.

"Fine...You're not forgiven?" Ethan said, questioningly.

"You can forgive me. Just wait until I apologize properly."

"Ok."

"I'm overly sensitive to the idea that I can't handle myself and I snapped at you which just proves I can't handle myself but I'm trying to change that. Anyway, I'm sorry." I finished.

"Apology accepted. For the record, I think you're doing the best you can considering everything you're handling." Ethan replied.

I smiled. "Thanks. I'm working on it."

Eventually the boys got hungry and we got ready to go. They wanted nachos so we headed over to Fuzzy's. On the drive over, Ethan turned on the radio. After hearing the slow jazz, I turned to Ethan.

"Elevator music? But we're not in a elevator..." I said, cheekily.

"It's the only thing we listen to in the car." EJ complained.

"Why?" I asked, feigning outrage.

"Tell Lily what song you were singing in the car the other day."

"Trap Queen." EJ responded.

"Hey! I like that song."

"I bet you do. Do you know what it means because he didn't." Ethan asked me.

I cleared my throat "Of course. It's a lady who likes to cook in the kitchen."

"Cook what exactly?" Ethan challenged me.

"Why, cakes and pies for Thanksgiving of course. What were you thinking?" I interrogated him.

He shoot me a look as we pulled into a parking spot at Fuzzy's. "Not Thanksgiving. That's why we listen to jazz. Nothing to misunderstand."

"There's nothing to understand at all." I argued as we made our way to the door.

"Exactly, it's all about how it makes you feel." Ethan said as he held the door open for us. I thanked him and went inside.

After dinner of huge plates of nachos and suicide sodas, we got back in the truck. On the way back to my apartment, the boys and I freestyled over the jazz music rhyming about what we're gonna eat on Thanksgiving. Even Ethan had to laugh at EJ's rhyme "to eat pie till I die."

"Thank you." The boys chorus as I got out the car.

"My pleasure! Y'all be good. Enjoy your break from school!" I told them. "Bye Ethan. Thank you for the introduction to Jazz. I really felt it- it's inspiring."

Ethan smiled "Bye Lily. Thank you for inspiring me to listen to the news on the way home."

The boys groaned and I laughed. "Hey, take it easy tonight." Ethan told me.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"You have plans with Amber right? Will mentioned she had been staying out late with you. Just... take care of yourself. Don't drink too much." Ethan said.

After my first therapy session, nothing sounded better than a bottle of wine to stop my rampant thoughts and numb everything out but I refrained from drinking. I hadn't been drinking nor had I been going out with Amber. Why would Will even say something like that? I wanted to correct him immediately and deny it!

I just nodded instead, promising myself I would figure out what he was talking about later. I had just enough time to shower and change before Trevor Skyped me. I picked up in a great mood...

...Until Trevor's face popped up. I froze and he broke out in a huge grin at my reaction.

"You like it?" He asked me.

"I don't even know what to say. I'm speechless." I said, moving in closer to examine his jet black hair. Clearly a wig, but it made him look so freaking different.

"Hold on a sec." He said before he disappeared. He came back a few moments later with a gray, spiky wig.

I shook my head. "No gray."

"Alright, last one." He said, going away again. He came back with a wig that was closest to his natural color, but it was in the style of a mullet.

"That's awful." I said, holding back a laugh.

"You gotta pick one."

"None."

"Which one do you hate the least?" He smiled, brightly.

I bit my lip to stop from smiling."I hate them all equally."

"You're no help Lily. I need a look for Thanksgiving." He tsked me.

"Sorry." I shrugged.

"Do you know what you're doing yet?" He asked.

"I don't know. Still working out my schedule for work." I lied. I needed more time to think about what Dr. Pereira said before I made a decision.

"Ok... we'll let me know as soon as you know. I'll get J-Mike to make you a turkey from the store."

"I wouldn't trust J-Mike to make me a glass of water."

Trevor laughed at me before Justine curled up at my feet.

"Did your doctor's tell you if they wanna do another round of chemo?" I asked.

"I have an appointment Tuesday to go over the test results, but they don't sound optimistic." He said, forlornly.

"They never do. That way they look even better when their treatments work. I do it all the time." I said trying to keep him positive.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yep. Someone comes in with a broken arm, I tell them they might never walk again. Can you imagine how I look when they walk out that day?" I teased.

"I can imagine..." he said amazed and we both laughed. It felt really good to just talk and laugh with him again. It had been uneasy between us until this conversation.

"I have something I wanted to talk to you about." Trevor started when he stopped laughing.

"I'm listening." I smiled.

"I was taking to Amanda the other day and she still having trouble with her friend she's staying with."

I sighed. Amanda got in contact with her friend who lived in Dallas and spent the last few weeks putting in job interviews. I got her to open up to me a little, but she was still painfully shy. I told her to let me know if she needed a ride or even if she needed to borrow my car but I never heard from her unless I reached out to her.

"I was thinking about letting her sublet the apartment. Once you move into your house." Trevor said.

I know, it was completely pointless to hold out hope for us, he was so fucking stubborn, but a small part of me still did. A part of me hoped he would see the changes I was making and how I was being independent and doing things on my own. Maybe then he'd realize he did see a future with us together- it fucking hit me hard that he still didn't. I thought I sensed a change in his demeanor when I told him I bought a house, even though he said he was happy for me. Not only was he ok with me moving out but he wanted someone else in the space we shared. I recover quickly, hoping he didn't see the hurt, disappointment and tinge of anger I was feeling on my face.

"That's funny because I was just looking at dates to move. I could be packed up by next weekend." I said, forcing a smile on my face.

"It's no rush. Just an idea-" He said quickly.

"It's actually a great idea. Really. Um, let me call around for movers and I'll let you know."

"Lily-"

"I'll call you back." I lied, hanging up the phone. I laid on the couch and thought about how my doctor asked me if I ever told Trevor how I was feeling.

When my phone rang, I answered it- deciding to take Dr. Pereira and let him know how I felt- at least the pain and disappointment. I didn't even look at the caller. I should have.

"Lily, I really need to speak to you. It's important." A familiar voice told me over the phone.

I had to look at the number to recognize who it was. "Christian?"

"Yeah."

I took a deep breath and counted to 10, then 20. He didn't say anything, so I started. "Look, I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you the last time we talked, but my feelings are the same. I don't want anything to do with you-"

"I get that." He cut me off sharply. "Just make sure this information gets to your cousin alright?"

"What about my cousin?" I asked, my interest peaked.

"Noelle's phone was hacked. Everything has been leaked online." Christian said.

"Ok... what does that have to do with Bianca?"

"She'll know." He hung up on me before I could say another word.