Shake it Out

"And I've been a fool and I've been blind

I can never leave the past behind

I can see no way, I can see no way

I'm always dragging that horse around

All of his questions, such a mournful sound

Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground

Cause I like to keep my issues drawn

But it's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out

Shake it out, shake it out, ooh whoa

Shake it out, shake it out

Shake it out, shake it out, ooh whoa

And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back

So shake him off, oh whoa" Shake it Out by Florence and the Machine

"Are you sure you don't want to come?" Ethan asked as he got ready to go to EJ's basketball game.

"Yeah, I need to call my dad and tell him about...everything. I want to get it over with before EJ's birthday party." I was dreading telling anyone else about the woman who gave birth to me. I knew I had to tell my dad- he been asking about it since I told him I wrote her.

"You know you can skip the party?" He stood up after tying his shoes, looking effortlessly handsome with a little stubble on his face, black cargo pants and his team penguin shirt.

"Why would I skip the party?" I asked, after I was done checking him out.

"To take time for yourself." He responded.

"I had time to myself all week, this party is the highlight of my week. I'm going." I told him, gathering up my confidence.

"Ok." He said, moving in to give me a hug. I stepped into his arms, tilting my head back to give him a kiss. He kissed me tenderly, but I deepened the kiss as he held me close. My body molded against his and I ached with desire. I pulled away, abruptly, afraid I was using our attraction to each other to make myself feel better.

He let me pull away, but studied me carefully, before his phone rang. He looked down at it. "It's Megan." He said, apologetically as he turned away to answer the phone.

"Hello... Everything is fine...I'm on the way to his game right now... I'll check in after the game... Text me how many more we need... Ok." He hung up and turned to me. "Do you want me to pick you up after the game so we can ride to his party together?" He asked.

"No, I have a few errands I need to take care so I'll meet you there." I declined, walking him to the door.

"Call me if you change your mind or need anything." He told me as he stopped in front of the door.

"I will." I nodded.

"Seriously. You said you didn't want to be excluded last weekend, I feel the same way. Keep me informed." Ethan said.

I smiled, sincerely. "I promise, I will." I leaned in for a quick peck, pulling away before it developed into anything else. "See you later.

"Later Lily." He said before leaving.

After I watched him leave, I fed Justine and let her outside before I checked my phone. I had texts from Amber, Staci, Rocky, and Forrest. I decided to respond to them before I called my dad.

Amber: I'll be at the birthday party so we can deal with that bitch!

I didn't know who she was talking about until I read Staci's reply.

Staci: Mia lives off attention. Positive or negative. Ignore her... And Christian too. They both ain't shit.

Amber: I can't see her at work and not say anything. She's foul and needs to be called out!

Me: Staci is right- don't give her any attention.

Forrest: Rocky told me what you said to her. That was harsh Lily. She's going through a lot right now. You should be supporting her, not criticizing her.

Me: Wow, so your phone does work!  I think the best support I can give her is telling her the truth. Maybe the delivery was wrong, but the message wasn't. And it got her to talk to you, so you're welcome!

Rocky: I'm sorry and I promise I'm going to do better.

I held off on responding to her, planning to talk to her in person. I decided to text Cam, Bianca, and Benjamin the news about the woman who gave birth to me and her refusal to tall to me. Cam and Bianca both called me back, but I told them that I still needed to call Dad and I really didn't want to talk about it. Cam understood and told me he and Jenna were a phone call away if I needed anything. Bianca made me promise to come out for her birthday to celebrate how great our lives were without our mothers. 

After I talked to her, I gathered all my strength to call my dad. He answered on the 2nd ring.

"Good morning dad." I started.

"Good morning Lily. How are you? Is everything ok?" He asked.

"Uh, yeah. Everything's ok. Work's good. I'm good." I said, stalling. I took a deep breath before I revealed why I called. "I heard back from my- the woman who gave birth to me. She said she made the decision not to be a part of my life and sticks by it. She doesn't want to talk to me or me to reach out to her again."

My dad was uncharacteristically silent before he finally responded. "Damn her!" It was my turn to be silent. Any show of emotion was rare for him, but cursing out of anger was a big never in his book. "The best decision she made was staying out of your life." He proclaimed.

I blanched. "I was hoping to get some clarity about why that was. Or is."

"She's selfish Lilian. Always been. I know you wish there was more to it than that, but she incompatible of caring about anyone but herself." He said with vitriol.

Part of me believed that too, but another part of me understood there was a reason she turned out that way. "Ok. I didn't want you to be upset. I just wanted to let you know what happened. " I said, exhausted by the conversation already.

"I'm not upset. If anything, I'm glad she showed her true colors so this can be over and done."

"Right. I gotta get going. Tell Beatrice I said hello."

"Sure."

As soon as I got off the phone, I saw I had a message from Benjamin.

Benjamin: I know something happened Lily. At the very least you deserve answers. Now that you know her information, don't give her a choice about talking to you.

The thought of confronting her about her past never crossed my mind. I let it go for the time being to get ready for the party.  I chose my bikini with a tankini top and boyshort bottoms with my tank cover up and jean cutoffs to wear to the party. When I was done getting dressed, I called Rocky as I put EJ's present and a change of clothes in my car. She told me she was dropping by the party to give EJ his gift and pick up Ace from Brandon. I asked if we could meet up before the party and she invited me over. When I arrived at her house, she let me in with a nervous smile on her face.

I immediately gave her a huge hug. "I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry for lashing out at you." She said, hugging me back.

"I was lashing out at you too. I was 50% frustrated with you and 50% upset about other shit that had nothing to do with you." I said as I pulled back.

"But you were 100% right. Kids don't cause messes, they're born into them. I'm cleaning my mess up." She said as we sat on the couch.

"Does cleaning up mean a reconciliation with Forrest? Because he tried to scold me via text about what I said to you." I questioned.

She shook her head. "I apologized and told him that you going off made me realize how badly I handled everything."

I smiled. "I told him that too! I literally texted him that me going off got him a phone call from you."

We both laughed before she asked. "What other shit is going on with you?"

I waved it off. "I'll tell you another time. I don't want to get into it right now."

"Ok. Let's go to the party." Rocky stood up.

"You don't plan on swimming?" I eyed her black capris and blue blouse.

"No. Ace is too young for all that."

"I don't have a kid and I plan on going down at least one slide."

"You don't need a kid- you are one." She snorted at me, good humoredly.

I laughed. "Whatever mami."

I ended up riding with her, figuring Ethan or Amber could drop me off to get my car. I caught up with her about Forrest, Ace and Brandon on the drive. She and Forrest both decided the timing wasn't right but left the possibility open for trying again in the future. Brandon applied to and got an executive position at a new Target in the Colony. It was a little far from his and Rocky's places, but he would have a set schedule. He also proposed taking care of Ace's childcare when Rocky went back to work and told her to pick whatever she was the most comfortable with- daycare, nanny- whatever she wanted.

"I don't know if I'm team Forrest or team Brandon now..." I teased.

"Neither! Team Racqelle. I am figuring out what I want and all I want right now is to find a good daycare, lose this baby weight, and get back to killing it at work."

"Amber and Staci know good daycares. I can help with the baby weight. We can work out together until you go back to work. And you need to let me know what date you plan to go back so we can turn up before you do!"

We were planning times to work out together when we arrived at Great Wolf Lodge. We found the closest parking spot, which was still a good hike to the entrance. On the way, I text Ethan to let him know Rocky and I made it. He texted me back his room number. We welcomed the cool ac when we finally made it into the lodge theme resort. We dodge the kids and adults, scrambling around in swimwear and street clothes as we made our way the to the elevators. We walked to Ethan's extra room and were let in by Brandon.

Deborah was sitting on the couch, feeding Ace. "Hey ladies. How are you two?"

"Good. Thank you for asking. How are you?" I smiled, brightly. I was expecting to feel nervous or uncomfortable, knowing she knew I was dating her son, but she never made me feel anything but comfortable.

"Good for now. Ask me in about half an hour when the party starts and we're dealing with 12 boys all hyped up in a water park." She smiled, patting the couch for us to sit down by her.

"I hope Ace didn't give you any trouble." Rocky said, as Deborah burped him.

"No. He is such a good baby. He's perfectly content as long as he's sitting up and able to move his head around."

"Yeah, momma's little busy body." Rocky cooed at him, taking him from Deborah's arms.

"I wonder who he gets that from?" I teased Rocky and Brandon.

"His daddy."

"His momma." They accused each other, simultaneously. Deborah and I laughed at them while they gave each other a smile. It was so touching seeing them bond over Ace.

Ethan and his dad Albert joined us in the hotel room, and after greetings and hugs we sat down together and caught up.

"I have a beautiful family. We need to take a picture together." Albert announced, smiling widely at Brandon, Rocky and Ace before turning to Ethan and I sitting together.

"Stop Al." Deborah chided him in a playful tone.

"Stop what? When's the next time we're all going to be together?" Al smiled.

"Hopefully 4th of July." Deborah responded

"Am I invited?" I asked Ethan with a smile.

"I don't know. You know what happen last time you came..." Brandon joked while they laughed.

"He has a point." Ethan smiled too.

"Whatever. I have to work anyway." I laughed.

"You do?" Ethan asked me.

"Yeah, I told Dr. Clayton he could get 4th of July if I got Memorial Day. We just alternate." I explained.

"What time do you get off?" Deborah asked me.

"5pm."

"That's plenty of time! Swing by when you get off." Albert invited me.

"I will... If Ethan wants me there." I nudged him. He wrapped his arm around me as his mom replied.

"You're always welcomed whether he invites you or not. You're family: come over anytime you want." She stated, sincerely.

I nodded, wanting to thank her, but suddenly choked up. I warmed at the fact that she meant every word but the part that complete strangers were willing to embrace and accept me while the woman who gave birth to me wanted nothing to do with me hurt. That hurt brought tears to my eyes, and I stood up before anyone could notice.

"Excuse me." I said, heading to the bathroom. I ran the water, willing myself not to cry. I was in the bathroom for a few minutes when there was a knock on the door before it opened. I didn't have to look up to know it was Ethan. I felt him in the silence. I hid my eyes from him when he stood behind me. He held me by the waist, gently.

"I'm sorry. You were right. I shouldn't have come." I said on a shaky breath.

"I'd rather you be here with me." He said, rubbing my back in calming circle. "You can stay in the room and relax or I will drive you home. Whatever you want."

"No. I'm ok. I just need to say my affirmations and get myself together."

"Affirmations?"

"It's a stupid thing from therapy but it makes me feel better." I explained, looking up in the mirror at him.

"Say them." He instructed me, still rubbing my back.

I forced myself to look at my reflection, took a deep breath and recited. "I am strong. I am confident. I am worthy. My feelings may be hurt, my emotions will change, but it doesn't change who I am."

I said it a few more times until I felt strong, confident and worthy. When I looked back at Ethan in the mirror, he was watching me, looking deep in thought.

"I'm ok now." I nodded.

"Ok." He said, pulling away to grab my hand. We went back into the room and everyone was gone.

"They headed to the Megan's room before the party starts." Ethan explained.

I sighed. "This is the first time I hung out with your parents as your girlfriend. They probably think I'm a crazy person who cries at birthday parties now. I bet your mom is regretting that family comment." I lamented.

"No. Even before we started dating, my parents viewed you as family. Because of your connection with EJ, that is never going to change. You can view them as your family too, if you want." Ethan said, simply.

The sweetness of his genuine statement had tears threaten to fall again, but I blinked them back and gave him a quick kiss instead.

We joined everyone in the bear den suite that Megan rented for the weekend. It was massive and EJ immediately took me upstairs to the loft bedroom him and the few friends he invited to send the night with him were sleeping. His excitement was infectious and soon I was smiling, joking and laughing along with him.

On the way to the party room, Rocky walked beside me, asking if I was ok.

"My mom finally reached out and she doesn't want to be a part of my life so I'm dealing with it." I said, going with the rip the bandaid off approach. Strangely, it didn't hurt as much as when I told my dad.

"I'm sorry Lily." She said, sympathetically. "But it's like you said, kids don't cause messes- they are born into them. There's nothing you can do if she refuses to fix it herself."

"I'm finally understanding that. That I might have been born into her mess, but I don't have to be a part of it."

Rocky nodded in agreement. "That's right. You deserve better."

We arrived at the party room which Megan had decked out in birthday decor. Kids dropped off presents and got their wristbands to go into the water park. Amber and Will were waiting in the room chatting with a few of the other parents. Most of the parents were fully dressed, planning to stay in the party room while their kids played.

I was trying to secure Will's wristband under the guise of helping Amber with her kids when Ethan approached me with a electronic band. "It's the room key too. You don't have to scheme for one." Ethan smirked at me, putting the band on my wrist.

"I have no idea what you're taking about. I'm just trying to help." I smiled as he snapped it on me.

"Sure you are-" he started before Megan called him away to help with something.

I was pulling off my cover up when Amber pushed her phone in my face.

"Look at this!" Amber demanded. I squinted to make out Mia in a darkened room with Christian sleep beside her. I didn't even read the caption.

"Amber, I don't care." I said, putting her arm down.

"How can you not care? She's purposely went after him knowing y'alls history. You can't let her get away with it." Amber said heatedly.

"Get away with what? Dating a guy I don't like? I don't like her either. Maybe they'll be perfect for each other!"

"Did you read the caption? She's subbing you!" Amber continued.

"Amber. I. Do. Not. Care." I reiterated sternly. "I can't see her post because I never friended her and I blocked Christian. If it upsets you this much, you need to do the same."

She reluctantly put her phone away and we followed the kids into the water park. Krista ran off with the boys to the water slide and I followed her. We chatted as we waited in line before sliding down the huge slide. We slid a few times before we rejoined Amber, April and Robbie playing in the wave pool.

Robbie kept running away from Amber and I eventually gave Amber a break and ran after Robbie for awhile. We ended up in the kiddie splash area with Tatiana, Alex's mom and another woman I didn't recognize. I gave Tatiana a nod of recognition.

"Lily right? Ethan's girlfriend?" Tatiana asked me.

"Just Lily." I replied with a small smile since Ethan hadn't told EJ yet.

"Hi just Lily. I'm Alyssa. Tommy's mom." The woman next to her held out her hand with a smile.

Tommy, the coach's son.

"Nice to meet you." I shook her hand, taking my eyes of Robbie to greet her. She was looking over my swimsuit critically and I had to look away from her to keep from rolling my eyes.

Alyssa pointed out Robbie. "How old is your son?"

"5 in a few months and he's not my son." I said as Robbie headed for the outside door. I let him out and he headed straight for the wade pool with a giant wolf sculpture in the middle. It occasionally howled as Robbie splashed at it, asking me a million questions about wolves. I sat with my feet in the water as I tried to answer his questions.

"How fast can wolves run?" Robbie asked me.

"Umm-" I thought about it, wishing I had my phone.

"It depends on the type of wolf." Will answered, joining him in the water. Ethan was with him and sat by my side.

Satisfied with his dad's answer, he continued playing.

"Good answer. Why didn't I think of that?" I asked Will.

"A lot of his questions I answer with it depends. Sooner or later, he's going to realize I don't know anything but electronics."

"That's better than me. If it's not reality tv or food, or reality tv about food, I'm out." I kidded.

"I hear you. Gordon Ramsey is my guilty pleasure." Will admitted.

"Who's Gordon Ramsey?" Ethan asked.

"British chef? Hell's kitchen? Master Chef? Kitchen Nightmare?" When Ethan didn't recognize any show, I imitated Ramsey. "It's raw, you donkey! Shut it down!!!"

Will smiled while Ethan just shook his head.

"I have so much to teach you." I sighed, mockingly.

"About food, reality t.v. and reality t.v. about food?" Ethan commented.

"Yes!"

"No thanks."

"Donkey!" I called him.

"What sounds do donkies make?" Robbie asked.

He proceeded to ask me a million and one questions about donkeys. When his dad took him to the basketball hoop, Ethan looked at me with a satisfied smile."You feel like a donkey, don't you?"

"Shut up." I laughed, pushing at his chest. He smirked and grabbed my wrist. His light touch sent sparks up my arm as he stared into my eyes.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, circling my wrist.

"Better now. How bout you?" I breathed huskily.

He gave me a full smile. "Good."

I smiled at him, and was about to ask if the offer of spending the night with him was still on the table, when Megan joined us.

"We need to set up the room." She said, no preamble.

"They don't do that?" Ethan asked.

"No, but never mind. I'll do it by myself." She said, turning to leave.

"Let me go help her."

"I can help too."

"No. Relax. I'll find you in a bit."

"Ok."

I went inside and found Amber, Krista, April, Will and Robbie drifting through the lazy river. Not wanting to interrupt their family time, I went up to my room to change into a sundress so I could help set up the room. When I came back down, the room was set up and the kids in swimsuits and towels filed into the room.

Megan threatened them with no pizza if they didn't put on the wolf ears for one picture. They all begrudgingly complied and I took a few pictures of EJ with his birthday themed wolf ears. I sat down with Rocky, Amber, Krista, April and Robbie. Krista chatted about what she wanted to do at the hotel. Amber reminded her they were only staying for the party but Krista just planned their next trip there. Amber looked exasperated, but eventually ignored her as I talked to her about everything she wanted to do for the summer. She talked until the food was served.

The kids devoured the pizza, leaving little for the adults. Megan offered to order more, but the other parents politely declined. I leaned to Rocky and asked if she wanted me to get her anything from the various food stands.

"No. Ace is getting sleepy. I'm going to head out with him."

"Before the cake is cut?" I clutched my invisible pearls. 

Rocky laughed at me. "Girl! I told you I'm trying to lose the baby weight. You're supposed to be my trainer."

"I am! First rule, you can't deprive yourself. When you deprive yourself, it becomes a craving. Then you crave it until you finally give in and you overeat. If you want it, eat it- in moderation!"

"Fine. Bring me back a slice. Two if it's kid size."

I laughed. "Sure. Come on. I'll walk you out."

We got up and Rocky said good bye to everyone. I didn't need to walk her out as Brandon did. After everyone ate, we sang happy birthday and cut the cake. Then, EJ opened his presents. His friends got him video games, basketball gear, a selfie stick and gift cards. His best friend Jayden got him a 24 pack of Takis, mountain dews and a new headset for his xbox. EJ loved it.

EJ also loved the Jordan's basketball shoes Ethan got him. He had been asking for them forever, but Ethan wasn't one to overspend for a brand because an athlete endorsed them or because Tommy had them. I understood Ethan's position, but they were awesome shoes and matched his teams colors and I kinda wanted a pair for myself. He loved the hoover board I gifted him too, but nothing could compare to the new laptop Megan and Dave got him. He and his friends flipped out about it. I could tell Ethan wasn't pleased as his lips tightened. I stood up and walked over to him.

"She didn't tell you she was getting him a laptop?" I asked him quietly.

"She mentioned it. I thought we decided he was too young and didn't need one right now." Ethan muttered.

I looked at Megan as EJ gave her and Dave a big hug. I grabbed Ethan's hand behind his back and squeeze it reassuringly.

"I'm going to sneak out and get a burger from the bar and grill. Do you want something? Burger? Beer? Bourbon neat?"

He smiled at me. "No but if you can hold off an hour, after the party we can go out to eat."

"Really? Aren't some of the kids spending the night? Is Megan going to need help?" I asked, intrigued.

"That was Megan's deal with EJ to let them stay after the party. She can handle them."

I smiled at his reasoning. "Ok, sounds good but invite your parents too so I can redeem myself."

"You don't need to, but I will." He agreed.

The party broke up at the designated time. A group of 5 kids were spending the night. Once all the other kids were picked up and EJ's gifts were put up in his room, Ethan and I went out to dinner with his parents.

"Some of the other moms refer to me as your girlfriend. When are we going to tell EJ about us?" I asked Ethan as we drove to the restaurant.

"Soon. Let's talk about it after dinner." 

We went out to a seafood place near the hotel. It was a great dinner, with Deborah being her normally sweet self and Albert mildly teasing us about how long it took us to get together. When we got back to the hotel, we decided to stop by Megan's room to stay goodnight to EJ. We waited after he knocked on the door. There was no answer.

Ethan called Megan and learned they were at the arcade. We went down and found EJ playing with his friends and Megan watching, looking exhausted. When Ethan mentioned calling it a night, she glared at him. "Are you going to tell the birthday boy he has to go to bed?"

"His party is over. Tell him it's time to go back to the room and play with his new gifts." Ethan suggested.

"Or you can hang out with him, especially since you bailed last night and again today as soon as the party was over." She said smartly.

"You can't bail on something that wasn't part of the plan." Ethan corrected her.

"Why don't I take them on the magic quest?" I offered. "I kinda want to do that; explore the hotel a little more. Then afterward, they can go to bed."

"That's a great idea. Is that ok Ethan? Can that be a part of the plan?" Megan said, chirpy.

"Fine." He said, in a monotone voice.

"Of course it's fine. Thanks Lily." Megan said, in the same tone.

"They'll be up in an hour or so." Ethan told her. She shot him the peace sign before heading towards the elevator.

While we waited for the kids to run out of money, I asked Ethan, "Are we at the point of our relationship where we can ask about past relationships?"

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything! Like how did you and Megan meet? What about her were you attracted to? Did she change...a lot?" I asked, somewhat confused by their dynamic. They co-parent EJ fine for the most part, but they didn't really seem like friends. I was having trouble even imagining them in a relationship.

"We met the beginning of my senior year. We had a few classes together. She was smart and sarcastic, not silly like most girls were at her age. We got along well and we decided to be in a relationship. It never progressed past that. We actually broke up when I went to college, but we still talked when I was back home. When my grandfather died, she was there for me and we got back together. Then EJ happened. I wasn't there for her like she wanted and it caused friction between us. We didn't get along anymore."

"That's it?" I said, hoping to hear why she cheated and why it seemed like she carried some resent now.

"You were there when we broke up. You know how that happened." He mentioned.

"Oh." I was still curious but I didn't get the chance to ask anymore questions as the boys one by one began to join us. Once everyone was out of money, we went to buy magic wands and go on the quest. Majority of the boys thought it was lame at first, but once we made it a competition, we all got into it. Even Ethan was enjoying himself as we battled dragons, saved pixies and found jewels. After awhile we started working together instead of competing.

Instead of going to bed, we went to the howl dance party afterwards. We danced around and I recorded the boys dance off before forcing Ethan to dance with me. It was more of him standing while I danced around him but it was still fun. We had a great time and when the dance was over, Ethan rallied the boys up to go to the room.

He told them they didn't have to go to sleep, but keep the noise down as Megan was sleeping. We said goodnight and went back to Ethan's room. When we got back to the room, Ethan let me shower first and after I did, I stretched out on the bed, exhausted. I was dozing off when Ethan joined me freshly showered in a t-shirt and gym shorts.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, running his fingers over my hair.

"Tired." I exhaled. "But good. Very good."

"How did talking to your dad go?" He asked me.

"Um... I think he's relieve she didn't want to talk to me but that's not shocking. He's never thought me reaching out to her was a good idea." I revealed.

"Did he ever mention why?"

"Because she's a selfish, horrible person." I sighed. "I don't know. My cousin Benjamin thinks I should confront her with the little I do know."

"Do you want to do that?"

"No. I think I have to let it go. I tried, now I should move on." I explained.

"Whatever you decide to do, I'm here for you." He wrapped an arm around me.

"I know." I snuggled against him before we fell asleep.

We woke up the next morning and got dressed for the character breakfast buffet. Woodland characters walked around, waving and taking pictures with kids as we ate breakfast. The boys weren't into the characters, but they enjoyed the massive quantities of food. Everything tasted pretty much average, but they loved the waffles, french toast, bacon and donuts. They had a donut eating contest that would have put Homer Simpson to shame.

After breakfast, the boys went back to the water park. Ethan went to supervisor them outside while Megan and I found a table to sit at inside with everyone's belongings. I tried to make small talk with Megan, showing her the videos of the boys the night before dancing. She didn't seem interested in small talk or the videos and when Dave arrived, she ignored me completely.

The other parents came to pick up their children around noon and after we packed Ethan's truck with EJ's presents, we said goodbye to Megan and left with EJ. Ethan dropped me off at Rocky's so I could get my car. I waved at them goodbye before they left. When I got home, I took Justine to the dog park. When I got home, I took a shower and started a load of clothes. I was letting my hair dry as I vacuumed my living room when my phone rang. It was Ethan.

"I wanted to let you know I talked to EJ about us dating." He informed me.

"I thought you wanted us to talk about it."

"We are."

"I meant before you told him. I kinda wanted to be there so we could tell him together."

"He wouldn't have been honest because he doesn't want to hurt your feelings."

I didn't believe that, but I decided to follow his lead when it came to EJ. 

"Ok. How did he take it?"

"He was ok with it. He did ask if you were moving in with us."

I gasped. "What did you tell him?"

"I told him no one would live with us unless we were married and you and I haven't been dating long enough to know if we want to get married." He explained.

"Ok. Did he have any other questions?"

"Only if we would all have to hang out now and go on dates together. I told him no."

"That's why I wanted to be there so I could tell him that the friendship between him and I will never change."

"I told him that the only thing changing is that you and I will be spending more time together because we are dating."

"Still, maybe we should plan a weekend or something were it's just me and him like we used to."  I suggested.

"We can do that." Ethan agreed.

Once I got off the phone with Ethan, I saw I had a text message from Trevor.

Trevor: Booked my flight to L.A. Any suggestions to where I should go?

Me: My brother's house. He'll take care of you.

He didn't respond right away so I went to blow dry my hair. I was almost done when Trevor responded.

Trevor: I'm trying Lily. I really wish you wouldn't make me try so hard. Maybe you don't need me, but I need you in my life.

He completely misinterpreted the tone of my text. I video called him right back to explain. Besides, he was the only person that didn't know about Ethan and me. I needed to tell him.

"I was kidding. Like, hahaha, I made a funny." I said when he answered.

"I didn't know. Last time we talked you were not joking." He said, a half smile on his face.

"That's why I video called you so you can see my face expressions and hand gestures." I said, waving my hands, dramatically, knocking over my opened hair product in the process. "Shit." I exclaimed, quickly picking it up.

"What was that?" He laughed.

"My hair mask. This shit is like $50 an ounce. Stop laughing." I giggled too.

"You overpaid."

"Oh, so it's not working?" I cut my eyes at him, in mock anger.

"Your hair looks good, but I'll need to see it in person. Speaking of which, you wanna watch Thor while I'm in L.A.?" He asked.

"Send me the dates. If I don't have plans with my boyfriend, absolutely." I said, trying the bandaid approach again.

He gave me a crooked smile. "It's about time you told me about him."

I gasped, then close my mouth before responding. "Who told you? Amanda or Sammy?"

"No one did. You're brother eluded to you dating someone, but he didn't tell me." He answered. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was going to. It's just the last few times we talked it was awkward, and I didn't want to make it more uncomfortable by telling you about him."

"Why would you telling me about your boyfriend be uncomfortable?" He crossed his arms over his chest.

"It was uncomfortable for me when you brought your new girlfriend to my best friend's birthday party. But maybe that was because you rubbed her in my face, and sang our song with her..." I said, matter of factly.

"Savage Garden was our song?" He smiled, avoiding everything else I said.

"Don't change the subject. I just didn't want it to be awkward and uncomfortable so I was waiting for the right time."

He uncrossed his arms to rest them on his legs. "Honestly, I kinda already knew. You wouldn't have gone to a formal event and take pictures like that if you're not together."

I shook my head as I thought about the pictures with Uriel at the Mavs Ball he was referring to. "I'm not dating him. That was a bad date. My work friend Monica posed us like that. I don't even talk to him anymore." I explained.

Trevor's brow furrowed with confusion. "So who is your boyfriend?"

"Ethan." I said, watching his reaction closely.

His brow furrowed deeper, he opened his mouth to respond, then stopped before trying again. "I wasn't expecting that." He shook his head, his hair falling over his forehead.

"Awkward and uncomfortable huh?" I joked, slightly.

He pushed his hair off of his face. "Y'alll being together is."

"What? How?"

"How y'all met, everything that happened between you two, EJ. None of that is awkward?" He questioned me.

"I mean, we addressed all of it before we committed so no, it's not."

"Ok. If you say so." He said, doubtfully.

I changed the subject. "So your girlfriend can't watch Thor for you?"

"She's not my girlfriend. Just someone I was dating."

"Was?"

"Was." He confirmed with a head nod. "If Ethan is not ok with you watching Thor-"

"He won't care." When he raised an eyebrow at me, I continued. "Really. He's always trying to train Justine and get her to calm down. He'll probably like Thor more than Justine." I smiled at Ethan's wasted attempts on my hyper dog.

"That doesn't shock me. He's pretty stern. Disciplined. Grim." He listed.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Grim?"

"Just... Not easy going like you. Honesty, the complete opposite of you."

"Sure." I replied, flatly.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way."

"Grim? Complete opposite? How is that not a bad thing Trevor?"

He grinned. "I don't know. Opposite Attraction?"

"You needed suggestions right?" I changed the subject.

"Suggestions?"

"Places to go while you're in California."

"Right. Shoot."

We talked a little bit more about the places I liked to go, places Cam would take him and places Cam wouldn't take him but he should still go. We hung up and Trevor's comment of Ethan and I being complete opposites lingered in my mind. When I couldn't shake them, I turned on my music to tune out my thoughts and finished cleaning.