Love Runs Out

Love Runs Out- One Republic 

"T-Rev! Are you leading a tour of the place? You barged in here like it's your room. " I asked Trevor, calmly from my bed.

Trevor finally looked at me instead of glaring at Ethan. Ethan just returned his stare, unaffected.

"Is that what this is? Seems like a pretty in depth, detailed tour." He said, narrowing his eyes at me, before sending Ethan a dirty look.

"Nope. Just wanted Ethan to check out the handiwork of the bed. You did an awesome job." I said, standing, hoping a mixture of flattery and jokes would get him to chill the hell out.

He relaxed a little and gave me a long hug. "Of course I did. Was there any doubt? C'mon. Your first party ever and you're slacking on your hostess duties."

He had a point there. I turned to look at Ethan. "Pause that thought. Apparently, I'm being a shitty hostess. We'll definitely talk later."

Ethan didn't look happy, but he nodded and stood and followed us out of the room. I, on the other hand, was thrilled. First, I got to throw that "we'll talk later" line back at him. Second, Trevor arrived in the nick of time. I was *this* close to allowing myself to be vulnerable again.

 I said everything I wanted to say. I handled myself the way I wanted to. I didn't need whatever was coming out of Ethan's mouth next to jeopardize it. I did plan on finishing our conversation. But I was glad I had time to build up my outer defense again.

When I arrived downstairs, I saw Cam and Jenna talking to Rocky. Becca just stood off to the side.

"Really? You left Becca down here to introduce herself? You should worry less about me being a bad hostess and more about you being a bad boyfriend." I said to him, rolling my eyes.

Ethan smirked before leaving us to join Brandon. Trevor had the decency to look embarrassed before he waved Becca over. I smiled at her and she gave me a confused look. When she approached us, her eyes widened.

"Lily! I almost didn't recognize you! Your hair looks so good." She gushed. I smiled and gave her a hug.

"Thank you. Trevor told me y'all made it official. Congratulations... and good luck!" I joked with her.

Becca laughed. "Thank you."

"Excuse me for a minute." I said to them, before heading to my brother.

"Hey Cam! Hey Jenna!" I said, excitedly, hugging them both.

"Who are you? And what have you done to my brunette little sister?" Cam asked, surprised.

"Oh hush." Jenna laughed, "You look beautiful Lily."

I smiled. "Thank you. And thank you so much for coming."

"Think I was going to miss an opportunity to flex my big brother muscles?" Cam grinned.

I laughed. "Of course not." I don't know why Trevor felt the need to be watch dog. Even all cured and anger free and in love, Cam was like a freaking lion, ready to pounce.

I took Cam and Jenna around the living room and den, introducing them to everyone. I had to admit, when I got to Ethan and Brandon, I was expecting it to be tense. But it wasn't.

I was planning to do a "hi and bye" type greeting, but Cam surprised me by asking about EJ. Ethan handled it coolly, like always. He was informing Cam that EJ was spending some time with his grandparents while school was out. I left the conversation to retrieve drinks for them.

When I returned with beers for the guys, and a soda for Jenna, they were talking about the best areas to live in.

"The part of Plano you're living in is trying to cater more to the live, work, and play crowd. But there are some really nice residential communities too. And the school district is decent. So private schools are not always a given." Ethan paused to take the beer I handed to him. He smiled and said thanks before turning to talk to my brother. "I don't know if that's a factor..."

"Yes. Not anytime soon, but if we're going to buy a house, it would be." Cam replied.

"Plano doesn't have an ocean. He's always talking about raising his kids near the ocean." Jenna smiled at my brother.

"I said it would be nice." Cam corrected her, putting his arm around her waist.

"Wait a minute. This has to be said." I cut in. I looked at Jenna. "Cam was a monster growing up."

Jenna laughed. "Therapist remember? I know."

"No. You obviously don't. If you did, you would seriously be reconsidering this whole kid thing. And you said kids. Think about it. Mini Cam spawns." I shivered for dramatic effect.

"Hey." Cam said, as Ethan and Jenna laughed at me. "I promise, I will be across an ocean if you ever decide to reproduce."

I flinched as they all laughed. I forced a laugh too. I totally set myself up for that.

"Be right back. I'm going to go make y'all some plates." I said, turning to escape to the kitchen. I have 5 plates out, ready to fill with food. The warm foods are heating up in the microwave as I take a shot of tequila. Jenna came into the kitchen as I set down the shot glass.

"Can I help?" She asked.

"Sure." I said. I pointed out spoons and food to her.

"Is everything ok?" She asked me.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"I noticed things got a little tense back there."

"Sure. It did." I responded. "It's not weird they're being all buddy buddy now?"

"I don't think so. I know Cam feels like it's necessary to get along with the people you care about because he cares about you. I'm sure Ethan realizes the same thing." Jenna stated.

"It's not like that between me and Ethan. We're just friends. So tell Cam he doesn't have to, okay?" I said, ending the conversation and focusing on the food.

After a couple moments of silence, Jenna asked. "Liberating? Isn't it?"

I looked up at her. "What?"

"The makeover. It's something we women do when we're going through a major change. Cam mentioned you started caring more about your appearance when you moved to California. Now that you're back, you went blonde." Jenna commented.

"Not really." I shrugged. "It was just a housewarming gift." I left the kitchen to deliever plates to Trevor and Becca. When I noticed Jenna took the plates to Ethan and Cam, I headed outside for some air.

"So you're over your own party?" I looked up in surprise to see Jake.

"Hey, are you leaving?"

"Nah. Just walked my sister out."

"Aww. We didn't even open gifts yet." I pouted.

"Her boyfriend had a show. He's a dj. Besides, hate to break it to you, but she didn't bring a gift."

I flipped my hair, like I was in a shampoo commercial. "This was my gift."

He laughed. "So you didn't answer my question... done with your own party?"

"Nah...I needed some air. I'm pretty sure my brother's girlfriend just tried to shrink me."

"Oh wow. Shit just got real." Jake said.

I giggled. "Too real."

After a moment of silence, I asked, "So why is Sammy treacherous?"

"I guess I should have said potentially treacherous. She lies, all the time. About really small or dumb things."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't aware you we're so honorable." I scoffed, sarcastically.

He frowned. "Think what you want about me, but I tell the truth. If you lie about small things, you'll lie about the big things."

"So what don't you like about Rocky? Or why are they a losing team?" I asked again.

"I actually like Rocky. She's a ball buster, but I respect that. Still funny to press her buttons. If anyone's the reason they're a losing team, it's Brandon." Jake answered.

I felt my blood boil. "Is he cheating on her? That fucking bastard!"

Jake laughed. "No. Chill. He's not cheating on her. He adores her. It's just... I know that Brandon hasn't figured out what he wants out of life. Do you think Rocky is going to be the type to wait around while he does?"

Of course not. Bilal knew what he wanted. When it didn't match up with what Rocky wanted, she dumped him. Rocky molded Brandon into exactly what she wanted. Anything other than that, she would drop him too.

I don't tell Jake that though. "For a commitment-phobe, you sure know a lot about relationships."

 "I'm not afraid of commitment. I'm just waiting for the right one."

"Awww, you're a romantic manwhore."

Jake laughed. "I'm not anything. I can't help it that the more I hang out with a girl, the less I like her. I'm just waiting for someone that makes all the negatives worth it."

"See, I think I'm the complete opposite. I put guys up on a pedestal. And convince myself I'm not worthy."

"That's fucked up."

"That's not even the worst part. When I discover their flaws, it doesn't make me feel any more worthy." I admitted.

"Theirs or his?" Jake asked, knowingly. I ignored that question.

"I'm 25 and I've never had a boyfriend. I'm so fucked up."

"Don't be so hard on yourself." Jake said. "Just relax a little. Nothing wrong with dating and enjoying being single. He is not going to be perfect. No one is. Just make sure your first boyfriend is worthy of that honor."

I smiled at him. "You really are a romantic, aren't you?"

"Like I said, I'm not anything." He shrugged.

"So how do you have casual sex?" I asked him.

"What?!? I thought that was what you and Ethan started out doing."

"I thought so too, but here I am."

"I don't know." He said, running his fingers through his hair. "That doesn't have to be a part of being single."

"It is for you."

"So?"

"So teach me."

He grinned, wickedly. "Teach you casual sex?"

"Not like that. Eww. Just how to go about it without things getting messy."

"Honesty really. About what you want from the start."Jake said simply.

Honesty. Huh. A foreign concept to me recently.



We go back inside before anyone missed me. Sammy decided it was time to start opening gifts. We received a cool painting, some scented candles, lots of alcohol and gift cards. Sammy thanked Jake for his gift. It wasn't wrapped because it was a tower speaker that had a docking stations for a phone.

"It's really for Lily..." Jake said. Irritation flashed on Sammy's face. I looked over from my place at the dining room table at him in the living room.

"I heard her singing. This way, she can blast her music so loud no one else will ever have to!" Jake finished.

Everyone laughed at him. "Don't hate. You know I sounded good." I laughed too.

Sammy continues to go through presents. She gave Ethan a fake smile. "Thanks a lot Ethan." She pulled out a monopoly game, a Bop-it, a deck of cards, and dominoes too. I hopped up excitedly, and go through the rest of the bag. Battle of the Sexes, Password, and Yahtzee too.

"Ohmigosh Ethan! Thank you! You have no idea. I've been plotting slowly stealing all the games from Rocky's house, now I don't have too." I said, cheerfully.

"You're welcome." Ethan smiled at me.

"Yeah, thanks Ethan. You just saved her an ass kicking and me jail time." Rocky quipped.

I laughed. "Whatever. By not opening this sooner, I just saved y'all an ass kicking. Next party is going to be a game night!" I declared.

Sammy opened Cam's and Jenna's present next. It was a triple slow cooker with a crock pot recipe book. I was super excited about that.

"Hey, my gift goes with that. Great minds..." Trevor said, pointing at Cam.

Sammy found his gift and opened it. I'm expecting it to be a recipe book or kitchen supplies, but it was neither. It was a blue bedazzled fire extinguisher.

"Fuck you Trevor!" I exclaimed, over the laughter and 'Ohhhhs.'

"I'm guessing this is for Lily too, considering it's customized in her favorite color." Sammy said, slyly.

"If my memory serves me correctly, neither one of y'all can cook. So it's for you both" Trevor added, with a grin.

"Why not leave it the original red then? If memory serves me correctly, you know that's my favorite color..." Sammy questioned. Trevor noticeably flinched, and I stepped in to change the subject.

"I've learned since then. You know that!" I argued.

"Have I seen you prepare a meal and then tasted it? No, I haven't. So I don't know that." Trevor countered.

"Don't you have a girlfriend for that now?" Sammy said. Trevor just glared at her.

Urgh, here we go with this again.

"Becca, if he ever gives you shit about cooking, just give me a call. I'll be happy to list all the disgusting things he put in his mouth in college." I joked. The tension is broken as everyone laughed.



After that, the night started to wind down. Most of the guests were leaving. I made sure to pull Ethan aside before he left. We walked outside and around to the swimming pool.

"So, before you say anything, I need to say I wasn't honest before." I started. "I wasn't okay with how things happened at the bbq. I felt embarrassed. And belittled. And I didn't, I don't, understand how you didn't defend me."

"Lily..." He sighed. "I feel like I was trying to make the best of a bad situation. What should I have done? Asked her to leave? Regardless of the situation, she's one of EJ's friends' moms. I would have rather just ended things cordially to not make an awkward situation for the kids."

"Even if it meant my feelings were spared?"

"I guess so. At the time, I wasn't thinking like that." He replied, honestly.

"That's where we different. Cause I would never let anyone talk disrespectfully about you."

"I am sorry. It won't happen again." He promised.

"I hope not." I said. We were both quiet. I know we're at a turning point in our relationship. I just don't know what way it will go.

"I've never heard you sing." Ethan said, out of the blue.

"What?"

"What Jake said, about the speaker. I've never even heard you sing."

"Believe me. Jake was telling the truth." I confessed.

"I didn't even know your favorite color was blue." Ethan added.

I just stood there, not knowing where this was going.

"I'm realizing there's such much I don't know about you." Ethan commented.

"You know enough. We've been through a lot. There's a lot of history between us. That's more important than superficial things like favorites."

"I disagree. We have been through a lot. But its never been just us. It was you and EJ. And us and EJ. And then us hiding from your brother." Ethan said, shaking his head. "Even now, I would have never known how you felt about me if it wasn't for Karen interfering."

"So what are you saying?"

"I'm saying I agree with you. I think you're right. We should be friends. Just us." He suggested.

I looked away, but nodded. "Ok."

He put his arms around me in a hug. It took a couple of seconds, but I hugged him back. When he pulled away, he kissed me on the check.

"Goodnight Lily."

"Goodnight."

I watched him walk away from me, numb. I understood what he said. I agreed with him. But I felt like he just took a piece of my heart that I could never get back again. And I had no idea how I was going to live without it.