Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Don't Kill the Magic


"If you want space (you could have it)

If you want change (you could have it)

Sleep on your bed (you could have it)

Bullet to my head (you could have it)

If you want love! (you could have it)

The way that you love (you could have it)

If you want time (you could have it)

I'll tell you no lie (you could have it)

Just don't kill, don't kill the magic (ohhh) (x2)

I'm not ready to give up just yet

We could stay until we both forget

So baby, don't kill, (don't kill) don't kill the magic" Don't Kill The Magic by Magic!

"Hey bro!" I said excitedly as Cam, Jenna, Carly and Amanda joined us at the table. Trevor did too, but I ignored him. I got up from the tacos I was devouring and gave Cam a hug.

"Sisters!" I gave Jenna, Carly and Amanda a group hug. "I'm so glad y'all came! It's going to be the best weekend ever!" I cheered.

Trevor eyed me suspiciously. "Are you drinking?" He asked.

"No T-Rev! This is the best aguas frescas. No alcohol. Do you wanna try it?" I offered him, flashing a fake smile. He shook his head no.

"I'll try whatever you're high on." Cam stated.

"I'm high of life. It's wonderful and amazing and rainbows and butterflies and positivity all the time." I recited, casting a glance at Trevor when I said positivity. He frowned at me.

"Are you ok Lily?" Jenna asked me.

I nodded. "Of course. What's next on the itinerary?"

Bilal and Noorie left. Maybe to fight, make up, talk, who knew? All the talking in the world would not make me forgive Bilal. Noorie was all pissed at Rocky, but Bilal broke up with Noorie, not Rocky. Whatever happened before or after that is on him. Noorie chose to get back with him; why be mad at Rocky?

In fact, Noorie should take Trevor's advice and never be mad or upset or sad. Ever! That's what I was doing now, no matter how fucked up the situation was. I wasn't going to be mad at Rocky, Bilal or Trevor. #Team positive!

Since Noorie and Bilal left, Christian suggested skipping the weird, alternative band they wanted to check out. Ian agreed, and since I was now going with the flow, we abandoned our itinerary. We walked aimlessly around, people watching and listening to random bands, DJs, and singers. Ian led us to a folk blues singer that had a crowd jamming out as he sang.

"Oh wow." Amanda said excitedly as she looked at a sign for a gamer expo.

"Oh no. Not another geek convention. Don't you get enough of that at work?" Carly said, snootily to her sister.

Amanda blushed, embarrassed.

"I love games. Let's check it out." I said, latching onto Amanda's arm.

"Why don't we go together after the show?" Jenna suggested.

"Because Carly doesn't want to go. We'll meet back up." I said.

"I'll take y'all." Trevor offered.

"No, don't be rude and abandon our guest that you invited! We'll go. Show Carly a good time. I got Amanda." I declined his offer.

"Lily, y'all can get lost-" Trevor started.

I cut him off. "T-Rev! That's negative thinking! We'll just find each other." I said, in a whimsical voice.

"Lily, be serious. There are too many people out here to be stupid." Cam lectured me.

"It's not stupid. Don't you believe in magic and fairytales and happy endings?" I laughed.

Trevor looked at Cam, then me. "We don't need to split up."

"How bout we just stick to the plan and meet at the Flatstock at 7pm? I'll take the girls to the gaming expo." Christian offered.

"Yes!" I exclaimed. I turned to Trevor. "Y'all come out here every year right? Christian can get us there like planned." I smiled brilliantly. "It's perfect!"

Trevor didn't look happy, but we split up anyway. Besides, he should take his own advice! Be positive. Jordan decided to stay and listen to music, but Cam and Jenna joined us. Christian got a phone call, and answered it as he led us to the gaming expo.

Jenna walked behind with Amanda. I eavesdropped as Jenna told Amanda not to let Carly talk down to her.

"What's wrong with you and Trevor?" Cam asked me, interrupting my noisiness.

"Nothing! We're great! Can't you tell?" I said, trying my hardest to keep the sarcasm out my voice.

"Lily, don't play games with me." Cam ordered me. I rolled my eyes.

"If you didn't wanna play games, you shouldn't have come with us to a gaming convention." I smiled again, and sped up to walk with Christian. When I caught up with him, he got off the phone.

"You good?" He asked simply, looking over at me.

"I'm great!" I emphasized with a little skip as we walked. He chuckled at me.

"Great."

We finally got to the building hosting the convention. The expo had a little of everything; from Old school arcade, board, card and fantasy games, to ping pong and video games. It was a gamer’s heaven. Amanda and I loved it! As we played and watched demos, Amanda informed me she worked at a retro game store and was learning game design from her boyfriend.

"I grew up loving fantasy board games, then computer games and video games. My boyfriend does too, but now he works making horrible apps. He hates it." Amanda said.

"They make fantasy apps now don't they? Kate Upton is in a commercial for one. Trevor's world stops every time it comes on." I commented.

Amanda snorted. "Yeah, but he doesn't."

"Well you should, after he teaches you." I told her.

We played around and took pictures. We could have stayed for hours, but we had to meet the rest of them at the art exhibit. We walked to the convention center. Trevor, Jordan, Carly and Ian were waiting for us outside the hall. While we filed in, Trevor walked beside me.

"I'm sorry for calling you negative. Can we just forget all that and have a good time?" He asked, hopefully.

I took a deep breath and relaxed my face. That's exactly what I was doing: not "ruining" the weekend. "Aren't you having a good time? I am! Look at all this art!"

"Lily-"

"I like that one." I said, pointing at a concert poster. It was some band called the Assholes. "That would look great in your living room. Or bedroom. I heard that's your thing." I gushed.

Trevor shook his head. "I'm just gonna give you space."

"Aww, you don't wanna have fun with me?" I pouted.

"I don't wanna argue. "

"How am I arguing with you?"

"By acting like that."

I glared at him. I hated that he was treating me like I was unstable or crazy. I was giving him exactly what he wanted: I was being positive.

"You don't want me to be negative so I'm trying to be positive. You need to make up your mind what you want." I said, losing the fake cheerfulness and leaving him.

I got a call from Serena finally and she told me she was done for the day. I told her where we were and she joined us. We looked at the art together with Jordan. Carly was really into the different pieces. She was an interior designer for a hotel brand. She chatted with artist and got business cards. I had no idea what hotel would have this kind of art, but I kept my opinion to myself.

I used every opportunity to bring up Ethan with Serena, hoping she would flat out ask me about our history. I wasn't going to tell her, but I wouldn't lie either. Jordan gave me a weird look, but I ignored her.

"I get it Lily." Serena stopped me.

"Get what?" I asked.

Maybe she knew...

"I was wrong about all guys sucking and the cleanse and all the bitterness. I like Ethan. He's a great guy. I'm gonna give it a real try." Serena smiled.

I nodded, feeling like a complete bitch. Why would I interfere with that? If she doesn't want to be my friend because of our history, that was fine with me. It wasn't fine if I ruined their chance.

"That's what I want to hear." I said with a smile.

We left the art exhibit and headed to the Eco Light Garden. It was truly majestic. It was LED based art installations that were interactive with the public. It was really spectacular. We walked on circular pods that lit up as we stepped on them.

The displays captured all of my attention, allowing me to feel peace. I didn't even realize Trevor was standing next to me and Serena until he said, "Look at that."

I looked where he was pointing. It was a wave wall with LED lights.

"That's so amazing." I gasped.

"Makes you wanna believe in magic and fairytales and happy endings, huh?"

I looked up at him, trying to gauge his mood. He had a playful little smile as I watched the lights dance across his face.

"Kinda." I agreed.

Trevor turned to me then, and pushed the hair out of my face.

"Lilypad-"

"Lily! There you are!" Jordan called to me. I turned around to see her heading my way. "Ian and Christian got us wristband passes to a private show tonight." She said, excitedly.

"So you want to go to that? Not the movie screening?" I asked.

"Yeah! We can watch movies at home." Jordan said.

I looked back at Trevor. "It's up to you. I'm still going to the movie." Trevor said.

"I'm gonna go to the show with Jordan." I said.

Jordan cheered and Trevor pulled me in close to him. He gave me a kiss on the lips.

"Give me a call after the show."

I nodded before pulling away. I asked Serena to join us, but she begged off, saying she had events in the morning. She walked with us to the convention center across from her hotel. I gave her a hug and wished her a goodnight.

I then joined Ian, Jordan and Christian and headed to the concert. A friend of Christian was waiting for us with Platinum Badges.

"These badges will get you in anywhere, anytime." The guy bragged.

"Wow! This is amazing. Thank you." Jordan exhaled, eating it up.

"No one man should have all that power." I sang to myself.

"The clocks ticking, I just count the hours." Christian continued.

"Stop tripping, I'm tripping off the power." I smiled.

"21st century Schizoid Man" We sang together.

We both started laughing while Jordan and Ian just stared at us.

"Kanye West? “Power”?" I questioned them. "No?"

"No!" Jordan laughed at me.

After the first concert ended, Christian told us about another new artist he worked with. After grabbing a few drinks, we went to that show afterwards. We basically concert hopped and drank. I stopped myself after a third drink, but still had a blast. We mostly attended EDM and a few hip-hop artists.

We danced along and discovered new songs and artist. We heard a song about swinging your hips like a Hula-Hoop. Jordan and I playfully argued about the correct way to do that. Or at least, I was playful. In her drunken state, she actually was getting aggressive. It was fun to egg her on. She wasn't the only one getting stupid drunk. Some girls in front of us were arguing over a wristband for the film screening.

That made me remember I was supposed to call Trevor. I pulled out my phone, only to realize it was dead.

"What time is it?" I asked Ian. He looked at his watch.

"2 am."

"Fuck, the movie should be over. I need to call Trevor." I declared.

Christian let me borrow his phone and followed me as I stepped to a quieter area to call him.

"Where are y'all?" Trevor snapped, angrily in lieu of hello.

I winced. "We're still at the concert." I said, plainly.

"Ok. Do you need a ride to the hotel?" He asked, a lot calmer.

"I'll drive y'all." Christian offered.

"Christian gonna drive us. We'll be there soon." I said.

"Alright. Be safe." He said, shortly.

"I will."

I gave Christian back his phone and we went to retrieve Jordan and Ian. There were dancing way too closely for Jordan's taste. I remembered how she scolded me for twerking on a guy after the Bitter Ball. I went and grabbed Jordan, realizing the alcohol was lowering her inhibitions.

"Ready to go?" I asked.

"No!" She protested, drunkenly.

"I am, let's go."

Christian drove us to the hotel and Jordan passed out on the ride. After I checked in for her, Christian helped me take her to her room.

Once we got her settled, Christian turned to me.

"Is your and Trevor's room close? I'll walk you?"

"That's ok." I said, remembering Trevor harsh tone over the phone. I didn't even know where our room was. I put my phone on the charger and was just going to call and let him know I would stay with Jordan.

"No, come on. There were some shady looking people hanging around. Let me walk you."

"I'm gonna stay here. Make sure she's sleep and doesn't try to leave or something."

"She and Ian seemed to be hitting it off." Christian commented as I walked him out.

"She has a boyfriend." I told him.

"Oh... didn't act like it."

"I know. Must be something in the water." I muttered, thinking about Rocky.

"It's about that season." Christian nodded as I opened the door.

"Spring?" I asked as he walked out.

"That too. It's break up season. Gets hotter, less clothes..."

I smirked. "Weather doesn't determine behavior."

"That's just a factor. Think about it. Spring: The winter killed off the old so the new can blosom." Christian added.

"You know I hate that poetic junk."

"It's not junk, it's real. Like they say, we'll be safe till St. Patrick's Day. When is that? Next Tuesday?"

I smiled. "Yeah, but John Mayer is the only one who said that. Room for Squares."

"Ah, that album got me so much action. Body is a Wonderland." He remembered with a smile.

"I listened to it every night, wishing I had a boyfriend as sweet as John Mayer... before he became a douche." I joked.

"Like they say, be careful what you wish for." Christian smiled.

"Goodnight." I said, closing the door.

"Goodnight" He said before it closed.

I texted Trevor that I made it before hopping in bed with Jordan.

I woke up the next morning to my phone ringing. It was Cam. I answered and he asked what room I was in. I told him and he told me he was heading my way.

I groaned but pulled myself out of bed. I barely put on a clean dress before there was knocking on the door. I looked over at Jordan who was fast asleep. I grabbed the hotel key and went outside.

"Hey! What's up? You're gonna wake the dead." I said, closing the door.

"I'm trying to figure out why you'd be out so late and not contact anyone." Cam said, crossing his arms.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm an adult. I can do that."

"It's not about you being an adult. It's about me and Trevor being worried about you." Cam said.

"Trevor knew where I was." I pointed out.

"He didn't know if you had a ride to the hotel or a designated driver. I don't care how mad or how much of an adult you think you are, you need to stop acting childish." He lectured me.

I shut my mouth and nodded.

"We are going to SXCreate. Are you coming?" He asked. I shook head.

"If you leave, call me and let me know." Cam finished.

I nodded again before he left.

I thought over everything while waiting for Jordan to wake up. I tried to call Trevor. I saw he texted me back from that morning, but he didn't answer my call.

When Jordan finally got up, she got dressed and we went downstairs for breakfast. I stopped myself from asking about Ian. If she wanted to talk, I would listen. All she wanted was coffee and Advil.

Christian called and offered to take us to the festival. I declined when Jordan moaned at the sun shining in the room. She was in physical pain and I had mental turmoil. The magic was gone.

Jordan was feeling better after we ate. We were back in the room, packing, when there was a knock on the door. I hopped up to answer it. I was surprised, and a little disappointed, to see Christian holding two hula-hoops.

"Look what I found..." he smiled.

Jordan laughed and we put on shoes and went outside the hotel. Jordan insisted I went first. I did, and couldn't keep the hula hoop up.

"Watch and learn." Jordan taunted. She started hula hooping. I watched her as she keep the hoop swinging on her waist.

"If it makes you feel better, the song said to swing your hips like a hula hoop, not like you're hula hooping." Christian tried to make me feel better.

"No Christian! Don't comfort her. She was wrong!" Jordan called out.

I nodded, "She's right. I was wrong."

Completely and totally wrong.




15 comments:

  1. Let's hope that Lily saying she was wrong is her having a moment of clarity about acting like a petulant child. She really needs to grow up and stop being so passive aggressive with those around her.

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  2. Is there no cell phone reception at sxsw? Why did Trevor think it was a bad idea to get separated? I'm telling you, he treats her like a child!
    And them getting so angry she didn't answer the phone? Trevor knew she was with Christian, he could've called him if he was worried something happened to her. I feel like they treat her like a child do that's why she acts like one.
    Luita

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    1. She acted like a child she deserves to be treated like one the way she acted. Oh man all I could think the whole time is little brat haha. Act your age and people will treat you like that not saying they should but they will and glad she got off her high horse about the Serena thing.
      I'm sorry but if more boyfriend went with other girls and didn't call and was out all night I would have been posses too and it's clear Christian is a jerk with all this flirting and stupid comments about getting rid of old relationships.
      I wish I didn't read this tonight this post just made me mad. shows good writing though provokes emotion.

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    2. Correction *if MY boyfriend went....
      and *I would have been PISSED

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  3. Trevor answered angrily when she called at 2am, but...she used Christian's phone to call him so he probably thought Christian was calling and he's a dude and the flirty guy is with his girlfriend so I can see answering his call like that. Plus it said when she spoke after his abrupt answer that he was a lot calmer so I don't think he was wanting to yell at her.
    I would be a lot happier if you had them talk and make up because you could tell when they were at the LED wave wall they were having a moment. I want to hear about a great time in Japan :)

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  4. If my boyfriend treated me like that my inner child might come out too....cam has very right to play the role of protective big brother because he is. Trevor on the other hand....he needs to decide what he wants to be. Boyfriend or controlling brother.

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    1. Treated you like what, not tell you someone else's secret then try very hard not to fight in public even though you did and acted like a child then he never pushed you to stay with him nor came to your room to yell at her. I'm trying to find other then when he asked her to call him where he acted like a controlling brother

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    2. It wasnt his secret to tell so i get why he didnt tell her but the problem is that he didnt say that that was the reason he didnt tell her. He said its because shes so negative/that she'll think its her fault. It wasnt wrong for her to walk away from that argument, nor was it wrong that she got offended.
      For the call, he could have called if he was so worried. I dont know if he has Jordan's number but he does have Christian's.
      I really find Trevor annoying. She knows him so maybe its why she's okay with all that but seriously I wouldnt like it if my bf didnt trust me enough to invite me to an event he goes every yr and then treats me like a child when we go, and then doesnt even trust me to get to the hotel safe, thinking that ill just get drunk, be irresponsible and then going and telling my brother all that.

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  5. I can't really judge or blame Lily for some of her behavior, I think hindsite is 20/20 and she knows she made a mistake by being so passive-aggressive. But, really, we ALL do things we would normally not do under "normal" circumstances that come out when we get upset/hurt/overwhelmed/etc. We all lash out. We are all brats sometimes.

    I am actually surprised she didn't just freak out and ruin the whole trip by leaving and causing a scene. I think both Lily AND Trevor need to grow up and mature or their relationship is doomed. lol Just my opinion. Don't hate. haha

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    Replies
    1. Every relationship has to work on things because humans aren't perfect if you looked at any couple and only focused on their faults you could say every relationship is doomed haha

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    2. Oh absolutely! You're definitely right! Nobody is perfect.

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  6. She's such a brat. Seriously she needs to start acting like a woman

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  7. Maybe she wouldn't act like a brat or child if everyone around her stopped treating her like she needs constant supervision, constant parenting. Everyone is anyways telling her how to act, how to thin, what to do. I've been here, the more you're treated that way the more you act like you need it. Trevor treats her like she can't act right, cam acts like her frigging father. Chill the hell out leave her the hell alone. Everyone of her friends are so bloody judgemental of her yet they can do no wrong. I don't care that rocky did wrong, she's been taking it out on lily and Trevor knew why. He had no right to tell her what was up, but he had the right to tell rocky off which is what he should have done. Defend lily but no. Lily is just supposed to take what everyone else tosses at her and that's that. No wonder she fucking acts out. She's not allowed to to or say or be anything but what others allow her.

    Yep. Little angry lol. Sorry.

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    Replies
    1. THANK YOU. Exactly what I've been thinking

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    2. She needs to change her actions in order to be treated the way she wants, examples (not saying her) sluts get treated like sluts,overreactors people don't tell things, brats get treated like brats etc. Everyone including Sammy doesn't tell her things because she reacts unstable, come on she spied and accused Sammy of protitution. Maybe people baby her a little much but people bring on there own outcomes. she needs to start with Communicating, tell them how she feels and let them know or show she will not do what she did this time and every time. Then actually work on it.
      Now I don't know how everyone else was raised and I know some families and relationships are different, but there is nothing wrong with checking in on someone if it's past 2am and they never called and it was a huge event.

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